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Kaos' way behind movie reviews

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2860 on: February 27, 2019, 12:11:29 PM »
I reviewed it about 10 pages ago so respect my authoritie.  Actually, I enjoyed this one far more than the first.  I thought the first Equalizer was far too slow.  As I've said, I'm a big fan of the one-man demolition squad, if they're done right, which this one was IMO.  Just enough action and just enough quality Denzelness. 

If you want to see one-man demolition done WRONG, see Cold Pursuit, which I reviewed above.   
I liked the movie, I just don't buy where one badass could take out an army of badasses.  The first one to me at least made logical sense, here's a badass CIA/Spook against Russian Mob Guys.  Plausible he could take out 6 in a room.  But put 5 CIA/Spooks up against one, meh.

The guy on the tower had one entry point, and he didn't think to cover the ladder...OKay!

Like I said it was a decent watch but I liked the first one better.
« Last Edit: February 27, 2019, 12:13:02 PM by Godfather »
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2861 on: February 27, 2019, 12:46:49 PM »
I liked the movie, I just don't buy where one badass could take out an army of badasses.  The first one to me at least made logical sense, here's a badass CIA/Spook against Russian Mob Guys.  Plausible he could take out 6 in a room.  But put 5 CIA/Spooks up against one, meh.

The guy on the tower had one entry point, and he didn't think to cover the ladder...OKay!

Like I said it was a decent watch but I liked the first one better.
Well to be fair, 99% of the one-man flicks are total fantasy and hardly even remotely believable.  But I accept that going in.  I'm not a huge fan of the one guy taking on 15 baddies at one time, all of whom are packing heat and he wipes them all out with a long, lead pipe that just happened to be laying close by.  Jason Statham did too many of those.  But here's one of my favorite Statham scenes.  Calm, cool and reserved....until you push it too far. 

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2862 on: February 27, 2019, 01:35:20 PM »
Equalizer 2
I just got nothing out of it. 
So, it’s like sex with Wes?
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2863 on: February 27, 2019, 01:50:09 PM »
I liked these movies better when Steven Segal did them.  

It’s the same thing.  

Above the Law > Equalizer 1&2 > Death Wish (Willis version). 
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2864 on: February 27, 2019, 02:21:39 PM »
I liked these movies better when Steven Segal did them. 

It’s the same thing. 

Above the Law > Equalizer 1&2 > Death Wish (Willis version).
I'm still waiting on the list of movies you have seen in theatres with dates.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2865 on: March 03, 2019, 10:43:15 PM »
The Vanishing 

Remember A Simple Plan with Bill Paxton, Billy Joe Bob Thornton and Bridget Fonda?  

This is basically the same story except on a lighthouse island and without Bridget.  

Trio of lighthouse keepers who are on a six week on, six week off rotation run across a beached lifeboat, it's presumed-dead occupant and his little chest of mystery.  

Jacob Snell (Ozark), Gerard 'Stroke Face' Butler (any number of crappy movies +300) and some wispy kid are the three keepers of the light who speak in occasional accents that I assume are intended to be Scottish(?), Irish (?) but the accents disappear from time to time and sometimes change tenor so it's hard to keep track.  

The movie is based on a true story in a way.  There were three keepers named Donald, Thomas and James who vanished from Flannen Island (a tiny bit of rock about 20 miles off the coast of Scotland) in the early 1900s.  When the light was discovered to be unattended and people went to check, the lighthouse was abandoned. The gate and door were both closed, the lamps were cleaned and filled, the table was set for dinner, and a single chair overturned. The gear used by the three for inclement weather was still in building.  To this day, no one knows what truly happened to the three men.  

This movie offers one theory, one stolen almost directly from A Simple Plan.  Once the three decide to keep the mystery chest they found (and they break it open to see what's in there), they have to slide further and further into a personal abyss and end up paying the price for their decisions.  

The story really doesn't hold together well, partly because of Butler's goggle-eyed overacting, partly because the pieces just don't really fit.  

Turn the captions on if you watch it.  The accents are usually unintelligible.  
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2866 on: March 03, 2019, 11:56:40 PM »
The Possession of Hannah Grace.   

This one boasted some pretty good possessed-demon action that made me consider how more amazingly fantastic The Exorcist could have been with the luxury of today's special effects. 

The rest of the movie really just chummed out of the same well-worn bucket of exorcism tropes that have populated countless other movies of the same vein.  

Reasonably attractive young woman with a slowly-developed backstory takes a job as a mortuary attendant.  A twisted and charred corpse shows on her second night. Also appearing is the corpse's father who intends to incinerate his daughter's body and release her from the demon that controls it.  

Nobody wants the dad to immolate the remains, least of all the remains themselves (which are restored with each fresh kill).  

Hannah Grace does a good job as the animated corpse and the possessed demon.  That was the best part of the movie.  The gross crunching sounds as it twisted its joints, the creepy crawling on walls and ceilings all made for a reasonably horrific demon.  Too bad the rest was cookie cutter.  

The film earned an R rating, primarily due to an early exorcism/crucifixionish scene.  Production values were good. The movie clearly had a big enough budget to do a lot of things right.  

But in the end, despite the effectiveness of the demon gal, it left me flat.  
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2867 on: March 08, 2019, 03:16:14 PM »
Overlord 

I liked this movie.  I liked it a lot more than I expected to.  

A band of US soldiers drop in behind enemy lines ahead of D-Day with a mission that will help save the Allied effort.  

Their planes are hit with heavy artillery and few of the original crew make it to the ground or escape German soldiers once they do.  Those that survived continue with the original mission and work their way into a French village where they encounter a sympathetic young, attractive French villager girl.  For reasons that the movie explains, she ends up helping their attempt to complete the almost certainly suicidal mission.  

In the course of executing the mission they run afoul of a nasty SS officer and also encounter some top-secret Nazi experiments.  Experiments on humans.  

Kind of a cross between World War Z and Saving Private Ryan.  Some pretty interesting effects and well paced action sequences make the movie extremely watchable.  The little brother of the French gal was great.  

Thoroughly enjoyed the movie, liked the mix of two genres.  Liked the Frenchie.  

Recommend.  
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2868 on: March 09, 2019, 02:02:16 AM »
Captain Marvel

The Marvel team really understands how to do the superhero movie.  This isn't a great movie, say on the level of Iron Man, Guardians of the Galaxy or Thor Ragingcrock, but it is better by far than the massively overhyped Black Panther or Thor Dark World or even Dr. Strange. 

It's amazing to me how the entire Marvel Universe fits in bits and pieces in the wide expanse of movies.  This one, in particular, backfilled so many holes and gaps in the overall storyline and each mini reveal made perfect sense.  I was left to wonder if they truly sat down in 2006 or so and scripted this entire thing out to the end, figuring out which movies would contain the tidbits of exposition. My hat is off to whoever is orchestrating this. 

Captain Marvel started off in a ball of confusion that lasted a good 20 minutes, but all the things that didn't make initial sense were all tied together in the end.  And it was worth it. 

The story doesn't fit in the timeline of the current Marvel pantheon.  It's a throwback to the 1990s complete with a Blockbuster Video.  It's the origin story for the character and by the end it circles all the way back to the end of Avengers: Infinity War as it sets up the final Avengers showdown (coming in April). By the end you know where Captain Marvel came from, how she got her powers and how she and her story dovetail seamlessly into the overall story arc. 

There's not a whole lot I can tell you without giving away critical plot points.  Captain Marvel (aka Vers, aka Carol Danver) is part of a Cree team of warriors in pursuit of the shape-shifting Skrulls. Eventually captured, she struggles through a series of memories that may possibly be planted.  She escapes to 90s era earth. The Skrulls pursue with her Cree compatriots right behind.  As Cap/Carol/Vers sorts through her memories to figure out what's real and what's not, she discovers who she truly is, how she got there and the source of her own strength.

Definitely worth the journey. 

There were so many good things about this movie.  Agent Coulson for one. A young Nick Fury for another.  A cat named Goose.  Callbacks to a handful of characters from previous entries; guys like Ronan and Korath from Guardians. Like so many Marvel movies it struck a perfect balance between pathos, action, story and humor.  I'm truly in awe of how well the Marvel team typically finds that balance.

I got to admit when the obligatory Stan Lee cameo showed up, there must have suddenly been a lot of dust and smoke in the theater because my eyes started stinging.  I wasn't expecting it and it punched me in the feels.

Some have complained about the performance of Brie Larson in the title role.  She was a little bland and flat but I think that may have been on purpose.  For all the immediate magnetism her physical appearance generates, she struggles a bit to elevate the personality beyond a cardboard cutout -- but again that may have been a creative (director's) choice.   She doesn't have the glib grace of Tony Stark.  But then again, how many movies did it take for Thor to finally be anything other than a stiff and stilted meat suit?  Four?  Brie is already much more comfortable in her space than Thor was in his for several films.  Plus I really liked looking at her.  Like a lot.  A lot a lot.

If you're invested even a little bit in the Marvel pantheon Captain Marvel is an absolute must.  I enjoyed the shining blue crap out of it. 
« Last Edit: March 09, 2019, 03:18:35 AM by Kaos »
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2869 on: March 09, 2019, 08:00:16 PM »
Captain Marvel

The Marvel team really understands how to do the superhero movie.  This isn't a great movie, say on the level of Iron Man, Guardians of the Galaxy or Thor Ragingcrock, but it is better by far than the massively overhyped Black Panther or Thor Dark World or even Dr. Strange. 

It's amazing to me how the entire Marvel Universe fits in bits and pieces in the wide expanse of movies.  This one, in particular, backfilled so many holes and gaps in the overall storyline and each mini reveal made perfect sense.  I was left to wonder if they truly sat down in 2006 or so and scripted this entire thing out to the end, figuring out which movies would contain the tidbits of exposition. My hat is off to whoever is orchestrating this. 

Captain Marvel started off in a ball of confusion that lasted a good 20 minutes, but all the things that didn't make initial sense were all tied together in the end.  And it was worth it. 

The story doesn't fit in the timeline of the current Marvel pantheon.  It's a throwback to the 1990s complete with a Blockbuster Video.  It's the origin story for the character and by the end it circles all the way back to the end of Avengers: Infinity War as it sets up the final Avengers showdown (coming in April). By the end you know where Captain Marvel came from, how she got her powers and how she and her story dovetail seamlessly into the overall story arc. 

There's not a whole lot I can tell you without giving away critical plot points.  Captain Marvel (aka Vers, aka Carol Danver) is part of a Cree team of warriors in pursuit of the shape-shifting Skrulls. Eventually captured, she struggles through a series of memories that may possibly be planted.  She escapes to 90s era earth. The Skrulls pursue with her Cree compatriots right behind.  As Cap/Carol/Vers sorts through her memories to figure out what's real and what's not, she discovers who she truly is, how she got there and the source of her own strength.

Definitely worth the journey. 

There were so many good things about this movie.  Agent Coulson for one. A young Nick Fury for another.  A cat named Goose.  Callbacks to a handful of characters from previous entries; guys like Ronan and Korath from Guardians. Like so many Marvel movies it struck a perfect balance between pathos, action, story and humor.  I'm truly in awe of how well the Marvel team typically finds that balance.

I got to admit when the obligatory Stan Lee cameo showed up, there must have suddenly been a lot of dust and smoke in the theater because my eyes started stinging.  I wasn't expecting it and it punched me in the feels.

Some have complained about the performance of Brie Larson in the title role.  She was a little bland and flat but I think that may have been on purpose.  For all the immediate magnetism her physical appearance generates, she struggles a bit to elevate the personality beyond a cardboard cutout -- but again that may have been a creative (director's) choice.  She doesn't have the glib grace of Tony Stark.  But then again, how many movies did it take for Thor to finally be anything other than a stiff and stilted meat suit?  Four?  Brie is already much more comfortable in her space than Thor was in his for several films.  Plus I really liked looking at her.  Like a lot.  A lot a lot.

If you're invested even a little bit in the Marvel pantheon Captain Marvel is an absolute must.  I enjoyed the shining blue crap out of it.
I agree with pretty much all of this.

I'll add that I enjoyed the period-appropriate soundtrack.  The opening riff of "Just a Girl" drops at just the right time.

My only beef with the movie, and it is minor: the interior fight scenes were very poorly lit and the action indistinct.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2870 on: March 09, 2019, 08:25:41 PM »
I finally got around to watching Jonah Hill's mid90s and really enjoyed it.

The title seems a little off the mark, though, because most of the musical references skewed late 80s-early 90s, but that's a minor quibble.

There are some scenes that are a little uncomfortable to watch due to Stevie's very youthful appearance, but ultimately the story was relatable and earnestly told.  I enjoyed the "look" of the movie as well.  It captured an almost memory-like quality with SoCal bathed in a golden haze.  Plus you have to love a movie with a central character named "Fuckshit."

I think Hill has a bright future behind the camera if he sticks with it.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2871 on: March 09, 2019, 09:48:17 PM »

My only beef with the movie, and it is minor: the interior fight scenes were very poorly lit and the action indistinct.
Hint. She wins...even in the dark.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2872 on: March 10, 2019, 02:09:23 PM »
The Hole In the Ground

Irish horror film.  

Apparently the "color by numbers" horror palette exists across the Atlantic.  

Mother and son fleeing a (possibly?) bad relationship move into an enormous mansion in need of repair in a remote location.  Kid spooks mom when he runs out into the woods alone, kid encounters something unusual. Kid starts acting weird.  Is he possessed?  Is he a clone?  Oh no, he has to be stopped.  Yawn.  

Of course there's the obligatory creepy neighbor who knows what's up.  

Five major problems that plague all of these type of films: 

1) Mom and son flee in a crappy car that barely runs but somehow have money to buy an enormous mansion and the money to repair it?
2) When a parent sees a child doing something unusual, what parent retreats quietly in horror rather than slamming the door open and going "what the hell are you doing in there?" 
3) When a parent sees a child doing something unusual, why is the first inclination to suspect demonology? 
4) Why would the parent not report to somebody, anybody, the unusual thing they find in the woods?  In this case it's a gigantic tree-swallowing block-sized sinkhole in the property behind the house.  And she doesn't mention it to anybody.  
5) Why do they always, always go to some oddball little town in the middle of nowhere at the end of a deserted road?  

The mom in the movie was interesting.  Unable to decide if she was attractive or not.  It was like Erin from The Office had a baby with April from Parks and Rec who was cousins with Wendy from The Shining. Sometimes I'd think she looked reasonably attractive, sometimes I'd almost recoil.  She had a real affinity for wearing overalls which was sometimes hot and sometimes not.  Decent performance with what she was given to work with.  

The kid looked like a plainer version of Haley Joel Osment. 

There was absolutely nothing in this movie you haven't seen before.  There was nothing done in this movie that hasn't been done better in other films.  But that said, there have been worse efforts than this.  
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2873 on: March 11, 2019, 09:48:43 AM »
Captain Marvel

Definitely worth the journey. 
See, I thought it was the weakest of any MCU movie (and prior to this, I thought the weakest was either the Hulk or Strange movie).  And a lot had to do with her.  I think she's just bland.  When they played "Just A Girl" during her fight scene, my eyes rolled.  I thought her action scenes were boring.  Loved the cat, loved Fury and Coulson, loved the Skrulls.

But Captain Marvel?  Meh.  Didn't care one shit about her.

And yes, the Stan Lee cameo was awesome.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2874 on: March 11, 2019, 09:59:37 AM »
See, I thought it was the weakest of any MCU movie (and prior to this, I thought the weakest was either the Hulk or Strange movie).  And a lot had to do with her.  I think she's just bland.  When they played "Just A Girl" during her fight scene, my eyes rolled.  I thought her action scenes were boring.  Loved the cat, loved Fury and Coulson, loved the Skrulls.

But Captain Marvel?  Meh.  Didn't care one shit about her.

And yes, the Stan Lee cameo was awesome.
I don't disagree with the fact that she's probably the weakest of the characters (personality wise) with maybe the exception of that dude who has a bow and arrows.  She's also (in some ways) the least interesting. 

I'm hoping that's a creative choice, however.  Her only personality trait (that she remembered) from the beginning was to be an emotion-free warrior.  How many times did Jude Law (and I can't stand that guy) harp on the fact that she had to be emotionally flat?  Like 50 times?  So there was that blank wall that was created from the start that she was saddled with and struggled to get much past.  Kind of like the Dragnet "just the facts" guy.  

Thor had no personality at all in the first couple of movies, but he finally got to be entertaining.  My hope is that she will follow the same sort of path.  

I sort of like the way she looks.  She's not what you'd call smoking hot, but she's pretty pleasant to look at.  

And when I say "worth the journey" it's not necessarily because of her, but it's because of all the things from all the other movies that are tied up and/or illuminated by the stops along the way.  
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2875 on: March 11, 2019, 10:10:43 AM »
And when I say "worth the journey" it's not necessarily because of her, but it's because of all the things from all the other movies that are tied up and/or illuminated by the stops along the way. 
My biggest concern is that up until now, I think of these Marvel heroes as having some weakness, and they just introduced a character that is the most powerful in the MCU, and they are just going to lean on her to beat Thanos (which is also the reason I never really enjoyed Superman comics).

I hope I'm wrong, I'm really looking forward to Avengers Endgame.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2876 on: March 11, 2019, 01:18:32 PM »
My biggest concern is that up until now, I think of these Marvel heroes as having some weakness, and they just introduced a character that is the most powerful in the MCU, and they are just going to lean on her to beat Thanos (which is also the reason I never really enjoyed Superman comics).

I hope I'm wrong, I'm really looking forward to Avengers Endgame.
I don't think it will go that way.  Would be a cop out if they did.   

And yes, that's why I've always liked Batman best.  He has his weaknesses. If we're being honest, he probably needed a therapist more than he needed all that weight training.   And he's mortal.  
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2877 on: March 18, 2019, 08:12:05 AM »
I don't think it will go that way.  Would be a cop out if they did. 

And yes, that's why I've always liked Batman best.  He has his weaknesses. If we're being honest, he probably needed a therapist more than he needed all that weight training.  And he's mortal. 
Yeah, they gave him one in Batman Forever but they made that character some kind of kickboxing, sleeps in the nude, nymphomaniac instead of psychotherapist. 
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2878 on: March 18, 2019, 08:44:17 PM »
Inconceivable

Nick Cage, Gina Gershon, Faye Dunnaway, Nicki Whelan (the stripper from Wedding Ringer).

So some people were sitting around and one said "hey, you remember that movie The Hand that Rocks the Cradle?  What if we make that movie all over again."  And then some drunk hobo wandering by heard that conversation out the window and bellowed "Nick Cage is available!" 

And then it happened. 

Nicholas Cage is as good as any other actor in this movie.  Enough said. 

I like Gina.  Always have.  There's something sultry, smoky hot about her.  I even think it was sorta hot when she did it KFC style in Killer Joe. I'd bust one all over her and not think twice. And I think she's got a natural ease on camera.  She could have been a good actress. But she has a long history of abysmal career choices. Add this turd log to that fire. 
« Last Edit: March 18, 2019, 08:46:33 PM by Kaos »
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2879 on: March 24, 2019, 01:40:11 PM »
The Dirt 

Always liked Motley Crue.  Well, let me amend that.  I didn't care much for Motley Corabi, but that was a short-lived experiment.  It's not that it wasn't "good" music, but  it was missing that semi out of control vocal chaos that Vince lent to the sound.  The Corabi album was too bland, too pasteurized, too tame. He's a better vocalist than Vince, but so is Pavarotti. I don't really want to hear Pava singing Kickstart My Heart either.  

As far as the band goes, I always felt they borrowed heavily from KISS even down to the scene where Nikki tells the rest of the band he "wants to create something people have never seen before"  Well, that's the KISS mantra and has been for decades, well before Crue arrived in '81.  And everything -- literally everything -- Crue did, KISS did it or did a version of it first.  (That even applies to the groupie humping, hotel destroying excess). 

This movie?  Not really a fan.  At various points, starting from the very first scene, I felt it existed in some ways simply as a vehicle to display joyous debauchery with no real attached story.  And even at that it barely brushed the story that was the hedonistic rise and fall of Crue.  

It played more like a series of "can you believe we really probably did this shit" vignettes than it did as a cohesive story of the band.  The film was also extremely lacking in introspection.  

I wanted to know why Nikki was in so much emotional pain and see his addiction and recovery played out.  I wanted to get a deeper understanding of Vince's resentment of the band and how he dealt with the horrific tragedies (both self-inflicted and natural) that were part of his life.   

I didn't need to see Nikki snorting coke off a chick's ass to know that he did that.  Showing that (and numerous other scenes of over-the-top behavior) kept the film from reaching deep enough into who the members really were, what drove them, what fed their private demons (and how those demons guided the music).  Why not tell the story of Shout at the Devil being written because Nikki's drug-induced dabbling in Satanism took an allegedly bizarre turn (including levitating silverware) -- and how that spooked him out of continuing the satanic imagery.  

This movie only dealt with the consequences of their out-of-control behavior in a superficial manner.  It didn't give us the story behind the band, it just gave us snippets of glossed over stories from within the band.  The entire thing felt like it was just dabbing paint at various dots that had to be connected with no real sense of structure or cohesion.  

I didn't hate it.  The guys playing the band members -- with the exception of Ramsay Bolton as Mick Mars -- were decent enough.  I just didn't feel as if the film cut deep enough to give us the real story. It only gave us the broad brushstrokes of what those of us who know anything about the band already knew.  There were no revelations and no real reason to watch it unless you just like Crue music and want to see other people pretending to perform it. 

If (when) there is a KISS movie I hope whoever does it will be willing to probe deeper into the real story behind the rise, fall, rise, fall and rise again of my painted heroes.  Or maybe I'd really rather not know. 
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If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.