Tigers X - Number one Source to Talk Auburn Tigers Sports

Kaos' way behind movie reviews

Kaos

  • *
  • 29535
  • It's GO time
    • No, YOU Move!
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1760 on: January 05, 2015, 01:44:07 PM »
Into the Wind
I liked this movie better when it was called Twister.

Lori from Walking Dead was in it. Spent most of the movie wishing she would die.

friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

GH2001

  • *
  • 23848
  • I'm a Miller guy. Always been. Since I was like, 8
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1761 on: January 05, 2015, 01:45:24 PM »
Unbroken. See it.

He ^^ speaks for all of us.

Absolutely awesome. Zamperini = balls of titanium. Best part is that it really happened.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
WDE

Kaos

  • *
  • 29535
  • It's GO time
    • No, YOU Move!
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1762 on: January 05, 2015, 01:47:30 PM »
Sanatorium
Typical horror movie. People walk TOWARD strange sounds in a deserted mental hospital going "hello?"

You do that, you deserve to die.

This movie was harmed by the abrupt clip POV that kept cutting from scene to scene. Just glad it didn't have the obligatory "cat jumps out and scares people" gag.

Kind of a B- horror film.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

Snaggletiger

  • *
  • 44540
  • My Fighting Pearls
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1763 on: January 05, 2015, 01:51:49 PM »
Sanatorium
Typical horror movie. People walk TOWARD strange sounds in a deserted mental hospital going "hello?"

You do that, you deserve to die.

This movie was harmed by the abrupt clip POV that kept cutting from scene to scene. Just glad it didn't have the obligatory "cat jumps out and scares people" gag.

Kind of a B- horror film.

This made me think of another homerun Geico hit in 2014.  "Why can't we just get in the running car?"


friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Kaos

  • *
  • 29535
  • It's GO time
    • No, YOU Move!
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1764 on: January 05, 2015, 01:59:03 PM »
Tusk
I don't know what I expected from this movie but what I got wasn't at all what I thought I was going to get.

One of the weirdest movies I've ever seen.  If you know anything about it you know the basic idea: dude tried to turn somebody into a walrus. So there's that.

It was surprisingly funny. Well acted believe or not. Haley Joel something wasn't good but the rest was.

Michael Parks was absolutely fantastic.  So was Guy Lapointe as a sort of French Columbo. If you watched this and know who Guy was, don't spoil it. And don't go to IMDB to see. It's better to just let it happen when it does.

Even Justin Long was pretty damn good in his dual role. 

The use of Fleetwood Mac was priceless

I probably enjoyed this more than I should have. But any movie that had the capacity to surprise -- even if the surprise is goofy -- wins Kaos points.

Movie isn't for everybody.  But it's worth finding out whether or not it is. 
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

Saniflush

  • Pledge Master
  • ****
  • 21656
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1765 on: January 05, 2015, 02:13:40 PM »
You are not allowed to like Kevin Smith.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Kaos

  • *
  • 29535
  • It's GO time
    • No, YOU Move!
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1766 on: January 05, 2015, 02:15:52 PM »
You are not allowed to like Kevin Smith.

Who?
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

GH2001

  • *
  • 23848
  • I'm a Miller guy. Always been. Since I was like, 8
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1767 on: January 05, 2015, 02:16:41 PM »
The use of Fleetwood Mac was priceless

Good catch.

Funny story - FM jokes about that album at their concerts.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
WDE

Saniflush

  • Pledge Master
  • ****
  • 21656
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1768 on: January 05, 2015, 02:21:01 PM »
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1769 on: January 05, 2015, 07:07:33 PM »
Lunchbox.

Is it true that chicks fart if you blast 'em in the ass?
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions

wesfau2

  • ***
  • 13850
  • I love it when you call me Big Poppa
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1770 on: January 05, 2015, 10:42:01 PM »
You are not allowed to like Kevin Smith.

Me and Silent Bob modeled our whole lives off Morris Day and Jerome.

I'm a smooooooth pimp who loves the pussy and Tubby here is my black man-servant.

WHAT!?!?!
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Kaos

  • *
  • 29535
  • It's GO time
    • No, YOU Move!
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1771 on: January 11, 2015, 09:38:01 PM »
Taken 3

Same same.  Liam is the baddest ass on the planet.  Ridiculously invincible.  One man kills dozens.  The first of several denouments was particularly silly with a goon unloading a massive machine gun at him while he ran in circles and somehow nothing ever even scratched Neeson. 

He looked old and achy when he walked.  Speaking of walking, this film was at least better than that one where he walked, walked, walked and walked. 

Movie was exactly what you'd expect.  It was really long on exposition -- longer than you'd think, want or care really. 

There was one scene where he was running from the cops and for whatever reason the yodeling song from Raising Arizona started playing in my head.  That sort of made it hard for me to take the rest of the movie seriously.  If you watch it, try that.  Just hear it in your head while he runs and they chase. 
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

wesfau2

  • ***
  • 13850
  • I love it when you call me Big Poppa
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1772 on: January 16, 2015, 02:55:16 PM »
Tusk
I don't know what I expected from this movie but what I got wasn't at all what I thought I was going to get.

One of the weirdest movies I've ever seen.  If you know anything about it you know the basic idea: dude tried to turn somebody into a walrus. So there's that.

It was surprisingly funny. Well acted believe or not. Haley Joel something wasn't good but the rest was.

Michael Parks was absolutely fantastic.  So was Guy Lapointe as a sort of French Columbo. If you watched this and know who Guy was, don't spoil it. And don't go to IMDB to see. It's better to just let it happen when it does.

Even Justin Long was pretty damn good in his dual role. 

The use of Fleetwood Mac was priceless

I probably enjoyed this more than I should have. But any movie that had the capacity to surprise -- even if the surprise is goofy -- wins Kaos points.

Movie isn't for everybody.  But it's worth finding out whether or not it is.

The shock/schlock of the walrus monster was part comical and part horrifying if you tried to imagine Wallace trapped in there.

As usual, Smith is subtle as a jackhammer with the emotional aspects.  The flashback in the last scene re: tears was cringe-worthy.

The parallels between the dehumanizing of "Old Wallace" to "New Wallace" and "New Wallace" to "Mr. Tusk" deserved some more exploration, but I guess Smith was going for a funny/odd tale and not a hard-hitting introspective piece.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Kaos

  • *
  • 29535
  • It's GO time
    • No, YOU Move!
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1773 on: January 18, 2015, 12:56:36 AM »
American Sniper

Bradley Cooper was good and about 88% believable as the Legend.  The rest of the movie was typical Clint Eastwood fare. Clumsily and woodenly poking at heartstrings with a gnarled finger. Awkward pacing. Threads left dangling for no reason. Auxiliary topics opened but never explored. Gaps in reason and logic.

Where the movie lost me:  Very badly done fake baby scene.  Back at home, trying to deal with his second child and the thing passed from mom to dad was VERY obviously a doll. It was so bad, there are already countless posts about it.  It's featured prominently in reviews.  It was horrifically bad.

Cooper's performance aside, the film was just painfully flat and lifeless. I wanted to be moved. I wanted to be inspired. I wanted to feel the tension and be for good guys but Clint's direction sucked every bit of that out of me.  I was never really given a reason to like Chris Kyle other than he was a twangy Texas boy who could aim a gun.  It felt like every potential emotional mark was completely missed.

There were numerous throwaway sidebars... his brother, for one.  "Fuck this place."  Ok. Why?  What was the natural exposition of that scene? 

I was emotionally invested in Lone Survivor. I had a stake in each of the main characters. I got their pain and felt the rage and helplessness. That movie (whether or not it was 100% historically accurate) reached me on several levels.   American Sniper kept me at arm's length for the most part.  At times I felt like Eastwood was even a little conflicted, not really sure what story he wanted to tell.

---- SPOILER -----

If you know the story, you know that Chris was killed during the filming by a veteran he was trying to help. The damn fool shot him with his own gun at a shooting range and then stole his truck.

Without that coda?  Without that sobering reality -- which, remember, was not even a part of the original story that was filmed?  This would have been a substantially less powerful movie and one that would (to me, at least) barely resonate. 

---- END SPOILER -----

It's not Black Hawk Down. It's not Lone Survivor.  It's not Saving Private Ryan, Full Metal Jacket or even Hurt Locker.  It doesn't reach those heights. 


Fake Baby:

friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1774 on: January 18, 2015, 09:07:17 AM »
I can't bring myself to see that movie knowing how much of a liar the guy was.  Why should I trust anything shown on film?   
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
The Guy That Knows Nothing of Hyperbole

Kaos

  • *
  • 29535
  • It's GO time
    • No, YOU Move!
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1775 on: January 18, 2015, 11:10:42 AM »
I can't bring myself to see that movie knowing how much of a liar the guy was.  Why should I trust anything shown on film?   

Explain.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1776 on: January 18, 2015, 01:04:03 PM »
Here's a big write up on him:

http://mpmacting.com/blog/2014/7/19/truth-justice-and-the-curious-case-of-chris-kyle

The biggest two for me are the Jesse Ventura case and the claim that he sniped 30 people from atop the Superdome during the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. 
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
The Guy That Knows Nothing of Hyperbole

Kaos

  • *
  • 29535
  • It's GO time
    • No, YOU Move!
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1777 on: January 19, 2015, 12:25:09 AM »
Life After Beth
Weird little movie.  And I like weird little movies.  Lots of people you'd know including:  Aubrey Plaza, Paul Reiser, John C. Reilly, the skinny dude from Criminal Minds, Anna Kendrick, Molly Shannon and Cheryl Hines. 

Girl dies, girl comes back but doesn't know she's a zombie. Parents don't want her to know. Boy loves girl. Boy fucks scarf. Boy at first overjoyed when zombie girlfriend returns from the dead, but is later less pleased. 

Just sort of meandered around, never really hitting on all cylinders. Not a bad movie, but not a good one either. 
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

Kaos

  • *
  • 29535
  • It's GO time
    • No, YOU Move!
Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1778 on: January 19, 2015, 12:40:41 AM »
A Beautiful Mind
What if none of you were really here?  What if I wasn't?

Never watched this because I just never much liked Russell Crowe.  Turned out it was a much better movie than I expected. 

I'm glad I knew nothing about it going in because it made the reveals that much more powerful. Halfway through I honestly thought I was watching a spy movie and the guy was going to turn out to be the one who saved the world from a Communist plot.  Thought the good guys were the bad guys and vice versa.

Was interesting to me to see Mike and Tony from Dazed and Confused paired up again.  Nobody else got that reference or was as intrigued by it as I was. 



I kept hoping Cynthia or Slater would pop up somewhere, but they didn't. 

I always thought schizophrenia was more of a person having two personalities themselves, not somebody who sees visions or apparitions.  After watching the movie and then hitting the googled chrome, I realize now that's not the case. 

I still don't much like Russell Crowe, but he was pretty good here.  I liked him in this and in Gladiator and not much else.  Oddly enough I watched both of those movies this weekend. As well as Godzilla (already reviewed), Planet of the Apes (Wahlberg version) and To Kill a Mockingbird (one of the finest movies of all time and no review necessary).  About to watch Grand Budapest. Played 36 holes of golf, went shopping with my best friend and her daughter, had a fantastic meal at a newly discovered Cajun restaurant with them and had carrots at Cracker Barrel. 

So anyway, good movie. Better than I expected and not at all what I anticipated. 
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #1779 on: January 19, 2015, 06:16:53 AM »
Here's a big write up on him:

http://mpmacting.com/blog/2014/7/19/truth-justice-and-the-curious-case-of-chris-kyle

The biggest two for me are the Jesse Ventura case and the claim that he sniped 30 people from atop the Superdome during the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina.

meh. Read the whole thing, the articles he linked and a great deal of the comments. Even if the poster's assertions are all correct it doesn't take away from the guy doing some amazing shit. I'm sure he did embellish some things in his book.

The poster, as someone who seemed more than a little sympathetic to 9/11 truthers, put an awful lot of faith in an inherently corruptible government ran civil trial, ignored that major media including communist news network confirmed the presence of some WMD in the form of bio/nerve agents were present in Iraq and lent an awful lot of credence to two people's account of a drunken story told by Kyle.

Was the trial horseshit? Did Kyle find WMD personally? Did the two people who related the story lie? Fuck, I don't know. I guess I should blog about it with a lengthy self righteous long winded rant about the stupid sheeple believing everything they're told. In the end Kyle probably did most of the combat shit he said he did. At the very least the medals he recieved were certainty not for fictional exploits. Maybe he got the big head and as a result developed a big mouth and his family profited from it, but I still like him more than the petulant little know-it-all blogger.

Ending your blog with a pointed discussion of the righteous mind and cognitive dissonance provides a quick and easy way to marginalize any dissent. That's a pretty clever back door for an article about questioning what you've been told.   

Kyle names names and units in his book. Collectively, a couple thousand military personnel could call him on any of his combat exploits. None of that happened in a total vacuum, and if he was the asshole braggart he seems to be at times there would be plenty of reason aside from truth and justice for any of them to come out and call him on any of it, before or after he was killed. The only person who did was known asshole Jesse Ventura, who I wouldn't piss upon only if he were on fire.  In conclusion I don't know if he lied a little or a lot (we all get creative when we're measuring our dicks) but I'm not gonna let it get in the way of a good movie. I think you've probably earned the right to drink too much and tell a couple lies when you've earned two silver stars and five bronze stars in service to your country.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
totally unreasonable