Kaos' way behind movie reviews

JR4AU · « **Reply #520 on:** March 28, 2011, 11:20:34 AM »

Quote from: Jumbo on March 28, 2011, 10:56:26 AM

I thought this movie was fucking horrible.

You thought wrong.

Jumbo · « **Reply #521 on:** March 28, 2011, 11:21:45 AM »

Quote from: JR4AU on March 28, 2011, 11:20:34 AM

You thought wrong.
[/quote

JR4AU · « **Reply #522 on:** March 28, 2011, 11:51:13 AM »

Quote function rulz

Jumbo · « **Reply #523 on:** March 28, 2011, 12:02:39 PM »

Quote from: JR4AU on March 28, 2011, 11:51:13 AM

Quote function rulz

That was funnier than Due Date.

Godfather · « **Reply #524 on:** March 28, 2011, 01:10:32 PM »

Quote from: Kaos on March 28, 2011, 02:36:04 AM

A Time to Kill
It's the middle of the night. I can't sleep. This movie is on TNT. It's an outstanding film, the To Kill a Mockingbird of this generation.

John Grisham's books are barely eighth grade level. They're fast-food literature. He tells essentially the same story every single time, he just changes a few of the names. I read his books and it's never taken me less than a day to chew through any of them.

Of all his books, A Time to Kill was easily the best. After its success, it seems to me that Grisham got lazy. It happens to the best. Stephen King has also fallen prey to the lazy gene. Instead of breaking new ground like he did with Salem's Lot and The Stand (a fantastic book) he churns out formulaic potboilers with little to no imagination.

Where many of King's novels have not translated well to the screen (curiously his short stories -- Green Mile, Stand By Me, Shawshank -- have been much more successful), Grisham's books do adapt well.

The film version of A Time to Kill is even better than the book. Far better, in fact. It's exceedingly well done. So many outstanding performances: Matthew McBongo, Samuel L, Donald Sutherland, Kevin Spacey, Sandra Bullock, Keifer, Ashley Judd and more.

Ridiculous that this movie wasn't nominated for an Academy Award and the shitty pile of gnu excrement The English Patient won that year.

Bullock was so much more amazingly hotter 15 years ago. So was sweaty Judd.

Hate the characterization of Mississippi as a Klan haven. I haven't seen that many klansmen in one place since I witnessed a march in the early 70s.

Still a very good movie and a story well told.

Side note: A girl I knew in high school was an extra during the riot scene.

I watched as well, this is one of my favorite flicks. Of course Matthew McConaughey is so dreamy.

Snaggletiger · « **Reply #525 on:** March 28, 2011, 01:14:50 PM »

Quote from: Godfather on March 28, 2011, 01:10:32 PM

I watched as well, this is one of my favorite flicks. Of course Matthew McConaughey is so dreamy.

Isn't he though? I mean his abs are so darn.....

Wait...

Godfather · « **Reply #526 on:** March 28, 2011, 01:15:30 PM »

Quote from: Kaos on March 26, 2011, 01:10:42 AM

Faster

Forgettable movie. For all involved.

This might be a first as well. Agree 100%

It was better the first three times I saw it.

Hard to Kill 1990
Payback 1999
Get Carter 2000

GH2001 · « **Reply #527 on:** March 28, 2011, 02:21:51 PM »

Pananormal Activity 2
Caught this Sat night on teh Netflix. Didn't realize it was a Prequel to the first one. The whole movie pretty much explains throughout HOW the first one came to being. The end of this one is the first 2-3 mins or so of the 1st one. AND this one also skips forward after that part to show you what happens after the first one as well where it left off. It was "ok". Had a few "shit your pants" moments but to me all these type of movies now are just cheap Blair Witch knockoffs.

Anyone else see it? Any opines?

I'm watching the Fourth Kind tonight so I'll post my thoughts on that one soon......

Also caught another classic this weekend as well:

Deerhunter
I've seen it 100 times but its still classic. A little long and slow moving but you get the point of the movie pretty quickly. Weird seeing Walken and DeNiro that young. Good but depressing IMHO.

Kaos · « **Reply #528 on:** April 01, 2011, 01:07:46 AM »

This Thing of Ours

Major fan of mob movies. Godfather, Godfather II, Casino, Goodfellas, Donnie Brasco, Once Upon a Time in America, The Departed... all among some of my favorite movies of all time. I've watched Godfather I and II probably 100 times each.

So when I saw This Thing of Ours on the Netflix list and saw the cast, i figured there was no way I could go wrong.

Phil Leotardo from The Sopranos AKA Frank Marino from Casino AKA Billy Batts from Goodfellas (Frank Vincent)
Big Pussy from The Sopranos (Vincent Pastore)
Sonny Corleone from The Godfather (James Caan)
Jimmy Patrille from The Sopranos -- AKA Artie Piscano from Casino (Vinnie Vella, Sr)
with
Joseph Rigano (one of the bosses from Casino)
and one other guy I know, but can't come up with the name of.

Gotta be a slam dunk, super fun mob movie, right?

Oh holy shit.. What a festering sack of garbage.

Imagine the worst porn movie you've ever seen. And by porn movie I mean one of the super bad shitty ones that tries to have a plot. Then take out all the sex. And leave only the bad acting. It was worse than that.

The story was stupid. The acting was horrific. It sucked balls the size of Maine.

This was quite possibly the worst movie I've ever seen. The. WORST.

GH2001 · « **Reply #529 on:** April 01, 2011, 08:59:42 AM »

Quote from: Kaos on April 01, 2011, 01:07:46 AM

This Thing of Ours

Major fan of mob movies. Godfather, Godfather II, Casino, Goodfellas, Donnie Brasco, Once Upon a Time in America, The Departed... all among some of my favorite movies of all time. I've watched Godfather I and II probably 100 times each.

So when I saw This Thing of Ours on the Netflix list and saw the cast, i figured there was no way I could go wrong.

Phil Leotardo from The Sopranos AKA Frank Marino from Casino AKA Billy Batts from Goodfellas (Frank Vincent)
Big Pussy from The Sopranos (Vincent Pastore)
Sonny Corleone from The Godfather (James Caan)
Jimmy Patrille from The Sopranos -- AKA Artie Piscano from Casino (Vinnie Vella, Sr)
with
Joseph Rigano (one of the bosses from Casino)
and one other guy I know, but can't come up with the name of.

Gotta be a slam dunk, super fun mob movie, right?

Oh holy shit.. What a festering sack of garbage.

Imagine the worst porn movie you've ever seen. And by porn movie I mean one of the super bad shitty ones that tries to have a plot. Then take out all the sex. And leave only the bad acting. It was worse than that.

The story was stupid. The acting was horrific. It sucked balls the size of Maine.

This was quite possibly the worst movie I've ever seen. The. WORST.

I never thought much of Pastore and Vincent in Sopranos anyway. We all know Sirico and Van Zandt stole the show there. Although I expect better out of Caan. I will try and catch this on the Netflix. Is it DVD or streaming available?

Watched The Fourth Kind last night.....

Fourth Kind
Oh ma Jesus....it doesn't even deserve a review. THAT bad. Horrid. Bad screenplay. Bad acting. Bad directing. I just hated it. I usually like Supernatural horror movies but this one was just awful. Jollovich - not her best. It wasn't even believable. Although it does show some real "actual" scenes of a dude killing people on film. Kinda weird.

Kaos · « **Reply #530 on:** April 02, 2011, 10:57:08 PM »

Hop

Packed theater. Mostly kids under 14 and parents. Maybe -- maybe -- two or three "full theater" laughs.

A couple of "over their heads" shots that got a smattering of small laughs from the grownups.

So it wasn't a comedy. Surely it could wring some drama from the premise, maybe give a tear-jerker moment (like The Santa Clause was able to do). Nope. All eyes dry.

So what was it. Cute. That's about it. It was just cute. It wasn't "awwww" cute. It wasn't "that's so" cute. It was just cute. Really had nothing to say.

What happened to Kaley Cuoco? She was sooooo hot in "Fuck You If You Want To Date My Daughter" or whatever that show was where John Ritter had his swan song (see below). She looked absolutely horrible here. Her hair was a shitty mess, her face looked puffy and swollen, and her clothes (except for the jogging outfit) didn't even fit well. She looked horrible and was a pretty bad actress, too.

Marsden? Goofy grinning bastard. Found him utterly annoying.

The thing I was most dreading -- Russell Brand as the bunny -- was actually tolerable. Apparently Russell is only an annoying fuck when you have to actually look at his goofy ass. He was much, much better as an animated character.

Animation was okay -- not nearly as good as Rango, but the job on the rabbit hair was very good. The movie just had a hard time drumming up any feeling for any of the cardboard cutout characters. And it really needed it.

Based on the enormous crowd I saw lining up for this one, it's going to make a shitload of cash and be number one for a week or so. Really a sad state of affairs.

Be glad when Kung Fu Panda 2 and Pirates 4 come out.

Saniflush · « **Reply #531 on:** April 04, 2011, 07:15:56 AM »

I have noticed that if the chick has a puffy or round face then she has no chance with you. Not critiquing just and observation.

Kaos · « **Reply #532 on:** April 04, 2011, 07:55:55 AM »

Quote from: Saniflush on April 04, 2011, 07:15:56 AM

I have noticed that if the chick has a puffy or round face then she has no chance with you. Not critiquing just and observation.

Round face, okay. Pie face not. kate winslet and Charlize Theron are said to have round faces. They are both pretty hot.

Puffy? No, I don't like swollen and misshapen. If they look like they've been boxing that day or just endured a bout of bee stings? Not a fan. Kaley looked like she boxed a swarm of bees in Hop.

Townhallsavoy · « **Reply #533 on:** April 04, 2011, 09:39:10 AM »

In another wife-decided movie choice:

The Bridges of Madison County

Jumbo · « **Reply #534 on:** April 04, 2011, 02:37:52 PM »

Quote from: Townhallsavoy on April 04, 2011, 09:39:10 AM

In another wife-decided movie choice:

The Bridges of Madison County

I raise you with my wife's movie choice last night....
Everybody's Fine
Notebook and Jersey Girl are comedies compared to this shit.

dallaswareagle · « **Reply #535 on:** April 04, 2011, 02:46:14 PM »

Quote from: Jumbo on April 04, 2011, 02:37:52 PM

I raise you with my wife's movie choice last night....
Everybody's Fine
Notebook and Jersey Girl are comedies compared to this shit.

I double raise with ANY movie on LMN. She gets to the remote before I get home-

AU_Tiger_2000 · « **Reply #536 on:** April 04, 2011, 02:52:18 PM »

Quote from: dallaswareagle on April 04, 2011, 02:46:14 PM

I double raise with ANY movie on LMN. She gets to the remote before I get home-

When I was at Auburn my roommate's parents were visiting. My roommate walked into the living room and saw his mom watching LMN. He said, "Hey! Isn't this the one with the asshole husband?" She said, "Yeah! How did you know that?" She never did understand what was so funny.

Townhallsavoy · « **Reply #537 on:** April 04, 2011, 02:54:51 PM »

Quote from: Jumbo on April 04, 2011, 02:37:52 PM

I raise you with my wife's movie choice last night....
Everybody's Fine
Notebook and Jersey Girl are comedies compared to this shit.

Kate Beckinsale vs. Meryl Streep?
Widower vs. Infidelity?
Did your wife enjoy Everybody's Fine? Because mine was pissed after watching Bridges of Madison County.

I'd take the recent non-old people chick flick over the liberal puke I watched last night.

Saniflush · « **Reply #538 on:** April 04, 2011, 02:58:14 PM »

Quote from: AU_Tiger_2000 on April 04, 2011, 02:52:18 PM

When I was at Auburn my roommate's parents were visiting. My roommate walked into the living room and saw his mom watching LMN. He said, "Hey! Isn't this the one with the asshole husband?" She said, "Yeah! How did you know that?" She never did understand what was so funny.

That's good shit right there. You also could have substituted "this is the one with Valerie Bertenelli" and been pretty safe.

Kaos · « **Reply #539 on:** April 04, 2011, 03:16:45 PM »

On a cold and rainy Saturday afternoon, I've been known to watch a Lifetime movie or two.