Things that are ass Week 4
1. The Cal Bears. Total ass. Currently trailing Washington 52-12 one series into the third quarter. I told some of ya'll Cal was ass.
2. Colorado. Those damn green racists spoiled their magical mystery tour. Colorado was always ass, but nobody wanted to consider it. We comin! My ass.
3. Lane Kiffin vs Saban, Ole Miss, and Jaxson Dart. It's like Kiffin's entire asshole puckers when his Rebels play Bama. I knew he would blow his last best chance to take down the elephant. The Rebels are ass anyway. Jaxson is overrated ass.
4. Texas A&M. Yep. That team is ass. Remember later that I told you this. I heard one of the idiots babbling that A&M were the clear front-runners in the SEC-W. That's a three or four loss team just like always.
5. Clemson. Ass.
6. Auburn offense and Hugh Freeze. I hate to tell you this because many of you haven't noticed but Bunyan Harrison is gone. This isn't his team. I watched enough of today's game to tell a couple of things. Ashford has regressed. I had no idea that was even possible, but he has. He's WORSE now than he was a year ago. The other guy, whatever his name is, has also regressed from what he was at Michigan State. That's on Freeze. It's not Hurlburg's fault, not after he's been gone a month short of a year and Freeze has had these guys since the summer. I honestly didn't think things could get worse offensively than the abortions I saw Gus trot out for several years. And then I absolutely knew there was no way it could get worse than the complete ineptitude Harkins brought forth. And then there was this. This is the worst offense I've ever seen at Auburn and it's not close. It doesn't do anything well or with confidence. The "gameplan" is double dirty dog ass, such as it is. I've refrained from saying much, but this is an abomination. It's a watered down version of the absolute worst of the pussified offenses we saw during the befuddled Gus years. It's Gus lite without the laminated play chart and late night Waffle House. And that is NOT on Haskell. Put that where it belongs, on Freeze.
7. RG3 - He's ass in the booth with his idiotic sayings and misguided bellowing. He's not as bad as Beth Mooings, but then again, what is? I'll give him some credit for his honesty "that was NOT a hold, I have no idea what they were looking at" but when he's just making up words? Ehhh. His "keys to the game?" 1. Wear lace. 2. Bippity, Boppity Boo! 3. Clementine shasta. WHAT the HELL are you talking about, son?
8. "It's personal." Deion started that shit. Now we've got Oregon's coach taking Deion personal and pissing off ESPN by (correctly) noting that the Cinderella story was over. There's also that Ohio State turd Ryan Day bug-eyed ranting about shit Lou Holtz (who I honestly thought was dead) said about his Buckeyes. He took that personally! Nobody talks about HIS team's toughness! Oh eat a butt nugget. Lighten up, Francis.