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Walker Kessler to Auburn

Buzz Killington

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Walker Kessler to Auburn
« on: April 13, 2021, 04:44:24 PM »
Since nobody else has mentioned this, I can only assume we are no longer a basketball school.
Well, in case you missed it (and judging by the attendance in here, you did), former 5 star recruit Walker Kessler, a 7'1" athletic center, has pledged his services to the Orange Pearls.  

https://247sports.com/college/auburn/LongFormArticle/auburn-basketball-walker-kessler-roster-depth-chart-scoot-henderson-desi-sills-bruce-pearl-164100310/
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

wesfau2

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #1 on: April 13, 2021, 04:50:22 PM »
Huge get.

Another brick in the wall Bruce is building around the state of GA.

Because....well, FUCK GEORGIA.
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And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

GH2001

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #2 on: April 13, 2021, 04:51:35 PM »
Front court may now be the best in the country - TWO 5 stars in 7'1 Kessler and 6'10 Smith (both shoot the 3 better than our departed NBA guard).....Green, Zep, Flanny handling things at the other positions and that's IF Thor (4*) doesn't come back which some are saying he may now.

NOTE - IF Thor comes back, I think Jaylin heads to Doc Brown's Time Confunctioner thing in record time.

Rounding out the rest of the team from that presumed starting 5 is a buffet of highly touted, mostly 4 star players as BACKUPS - Cardwell (4*), Trey (4*) , Akingbola (4*), Jaylin (4*), Moore (4*), Cambridge (3*). We have still 1, maybe 2 (depending on Thor) schollys left to give....one of these presumably aimed at Scoot Henderson (5*).....

Bruce just reloading y'all.....this could be fun. We are becoming that program in CBB.....a destination for top HS players to play if they have an NBA dream..never in a million years would I thought this would happen at Auburn.
« Last Edit: April 13, 2021, 04:55:55 PM by GH2001 »
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GH2001

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #3 on: April 13, 2021, 04:56:30 PM »
Huge get.

Another brick in the wall Bruce is building around the state of GA.

Because....well, FUCK GEORGIA.

Fuckin A weskie...say it again baby. Cock of the walk. 
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Buzz Killington

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #4 on: April 13, 2021, 05:03:04 PM »
Huge get.

Another brick in the wall Bruce is building around the state of GA.

Because....well, fudge GEORGIA.
You don't say much frien, but when you do it's to the point and I salute you for it.
FUCK GEORGIA!
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Snaggletiger

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #5 on: April 13, 2021, 05:03:29 PM »
Fuckin A weskie...say it again baby. Cock of the walk.
By the time we're done here, you'll all be wearing gold plated diapers.
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Buzz Killington

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #6 on: April 13, 2021, 05:04:01 PM »
Front court may now be the best in the country - TWO 5 stars in 7'1 Kessler and 6'10 Smith (both shoot the 3 better than our departed NBA guard).....Green, Zep, Flanny handling things at the other positions and that's IF Thor (4*) doesn't come back which some are saying he may now.

NOTE - IF Thor comes back, I think Jaylin heads to Doc Brown's Time Confunctioner thing in record time.

Rounding out the rest of the team from that presumed starting 5 is a buffet of highly touted, mostly 4 star players as BACKUPS - Cardwell (4*), Trey (4*) , Akingbola (4*), Jaylin (4*), Moore (4*), Cambridge (3*). We have still 1, maybe 2 (depending on Thor) schollys left to give....one of these presumably aimed at Scoot Henderson (5*).....

Bruce just reloading y'all.....this could be fun. We are becoming that program in CBB.....a destination for top HS players to play if they have an NBA dream..never in a million years would I thought this would happen at Auburn.
No, no, no...you got it all wrong.  Quaker is building a dynasty in Tuscalooser.  It's only a matter of time before he joins Sabbins on that golden throne.
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Snaggletiger

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #7 on: April 13, 2021, 05:08:19 PM »
I know GH was reading the same things I was on the bookfaces last night.  Carolina folks were going all Bama fan.  "He sucks.  Couldn't beat out ____ or ____.  He was just going to sit behind all our 6 star recruits.  No hands."

Then it was, "Pearl is a big fat liar cheater meanie and Auburn will be investigated for the next 30 years."

I loved Zag fan chiming in with, "You have to earn your spot on Few's club.  He didn't want to earn it.  It's the Zag way."
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Kaos

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #8 on: April 13, 2021, 09:48:57 PM »
Where does Frankie Sullivan fit into the lineup?
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wesfau2

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #9 on: April 13, 2021, 10:11:07 PM »
He's the sixth finger man.
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

jmar

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #10 on: April 14, 2021, 11:38:55 AM »
Where does Frankie Sullivan fit into the lineup?
Frankie Sullivan played basketball as a hobby and worked two jobs.
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jmar

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #11 on: April 14, 2021, 11:54:37 AM »
I know GH was reading the same things I was on the bookfaces last night.  Carolina folks were going all Bama fan.  "He sucks.  Couldn't beat out ____ or ____.  He was just going to sit behind all our 6 star recruits.  No hands."

Then it was, "Pearl is a big fat liar cheater meanie and Auburn will be investigated for the next 30 years."

I loved Zag fan chiming in with, "You have to earn your spot on Few's club.  He didn't want to earn it.  It's the Zag way."
We've never had this much athletic length on the floor together that can be rested. Not bad for an equestrian school.
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The Six

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #12 on: April 14, 2021, 01:09:09 PM »
Do y'all realize how good at cheating a place has to be that a guy would leave UNC Chapel Hill (where they literally make up classes for you to take) to come to Auburn?

Rubbing is racing in Lee County for sure!
« Last Edit: April 14, 2021, 01:13:23 PM by The Six »
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"I'm sick of following my dreams...I'm just going to ask them where they are going and hook up with 'em later." - Mitch Hedberg

Buzz Killington

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #13 on: April 14, 2021, 03:30:22 PM »
I'm just gonna say it.  I am not a fan of the Six 2.0
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Snaggletiger

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #14 on: April 14, 2021, 04:07:27 PM »
Do y'all realize how good at cheating a place has to be that a guy would leave UNC Chapel Hill (where they literally make up classes for you to take) to come to Auburn?

Rubbing is racing in Lee County for sure!
Don't know if sryus.  There are currently 1,293 players in the transfer portal.  I hope they're all wearing masks and showering regularly.  College basketball has quickly become a shell of what it was even 3-4 years ago.  It appears that if a player is even the slightest bit unhappy, they can just push the button and off they go.  Y'all know me and my Duke love.  That's pretty much faded into oblivion.  I couldn't name one player on that team the last two years because despite it being one of the blue bloods, it has become the proverbial revolving door.  One-and-dones and transfers have become the norm.  It's that way everywhere and getting worse by the day.

I made this observation before, but maybe a couple of months back, Auburn traveled to Baylor and held their own about as well as most did.  I believe the color commentator was Fran Frascilla (I just made that spelling up) and he said that if Shariffe comes back next year along with Justin Powell, and with the recruits they have coming in, Pearl's bunch would automatically be a favorite to go to the Final 4.  

Fast forward a few weeks.....uumm....NO!  Now who knows what this bunch will do next year, but since that statement was made, Cooper is gone, Powell is gone, Thor may be gone and 3 other players hit the portal.  Noiw, we have 2 new portal guards, two new recruits coming in, Kessler transported in and Thor is in limbo.  Again, I hate the state of college basketball.  


Maybe Kessler didn't like the campus.  Maybe he didn't like the coaches.  Maybe his girlfriend was sleeping with the equipment manager.  Maybe he ain't all that and a bag of Wavy Lays.  Who knows?

Oh, if you want another prime example of 52 card shuffle, look at Arkansas.  Don't know if they'll have one familiar face on the court next year from this Elite 8 club. 
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Buzz Killington

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #15 on: April 14, 2021, 04:21:44 PM »
Don't know if sryus.  There are currently 1,293 players in the transfer portal.  I hope they're all wearing masks and showering regularly.  College basketball has quickly become a shell of what it was even 3-4 years ago.  It appears that if a player is even the slightest bit unhappy, they can just push the button and off they go.  Y'all know me and my Duke love.  That's pretty much faded into oblivion.  I couldn't name one player on that team the last two years because despite it being one of the blue bloods, it has become the proverbial revolving door.  One-and-dones and transfers have become the norm.  It's that way everywhere and getting worse by the day.

I made this observation before, but maybe a couple of months back, Auburn traveled to Baylor and held their own about as well as most did.  I believe the color commentator was Fran Frascilla (I just made that spelling up) and he said that if Shariffe comes back next year along with Justin Powell, and with the recruits they have coming in, Pearl's bunch would automatically be a favorite to go to the Final 4. 

Fast forward a few weeks.....uumm....NO!  Now who knows what this bunch will do next year, but since that statement was made, Cooper is gone, Powell is gone, Thor may be gone and 3 other players hit the portal.  Noiw, we have 2 new portal guards, two new recruits coming in, Kessler transported in and Thor is in limbo.  Again, I hate the state of college basketball. 


Maybe Kessler didn't like the campus.  Maybe he didn't like the coaches.  Maybe his girlfriend was sleeping with the equipment manager.  Maybe he ain't all that and a bag of Wavy Lays.  Who knows?

Oh, if you want another prime example of 52 card shuffle, look at Arkansas.  Don't know if they'll have one familiar face on the court next year from this Elite 8 club.
Add Florida to that list.  They are picking up 3 from the portal and depositing 1 themselves.
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Kaos

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #16 on: April 14, 2021, 11:58:22 PM »
I'm just gonna say it.  I am not a fan of the Six 2.0
Just wait.  There's a version 2.4 with even shorter arms coming out in May.  
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Saniflush

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #17 on: April 15, 2021, 08:05:07 AM »
Just wait.  There's a version 2.4 with even shorter arms coming out in May. 
I don't think that folks come out any longer....I think that they are just ghey.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

The Six

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #18 on: April 15, 2021, 08:20:40 AM »
It's called a joke. A rib. A poking of the fun. Lighten up, Frances-es.
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Kaos

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Re: Walker Kessler to Auburn
« Reply #19 on: April 15, 2021, 08:31:15 AM »
It's called a joke. A rib. A poking of the fun. Lighten up, Frances-es.
He was a mule.  A mule who could talk.   

Can anybody give me an update on Scotty Pohlman?  
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