Week 2 Knee Jerk Reactions

[Kaos]

Auburn:  Get this out of the way first.  Defense is quality.  Offense is still like a bag of monkeys fornicating with a rotten pineapple 90% of the time.  Offensive like is appallingly bad.  That's not likely to get better.  Nix is talented, but he's a freshman.  Fucking around with a Tulane team that's half decent, but not likely to threaten much of anybody, getting no push to power the running game (20 yards in the first half, Gus?  What the hell?), the same stale play calling that's shackled Auburn teams for years....  When it gets to SEC play, this team is going to get its anus lapsed, prolapsed, and relapsed.  Lost a couple of receivers tonight too. 

Alabama, Georgia, Ohio State, Oklahoma: Fuck all. Play somebody.

Texas A&M/Clemson:  Aggies talked shit, didn't back it up.  Looked a little salty at times, but didn't really impress.  Clemson will sleepwalk through an extremely pathetic ACC.  Other than maybe an overachieving North Carolina, there's not a quality team in the entire sordid bunch.  Must be nice to really only have to prep for the playoffs. 

LSU/Texas:  I don't think Texas is very good.  In fact, I think the Longwhores are vastly overrated.  Their overrated Texas status aside, LSU QB Joe Burrow is a cocky bitch and he does back it up.  I heard the ESPN jackoffs talking about moving LSU up to 1 or 2 because they beat this great Texas program.  Oh, horseshit.  Texas is a mediocre team.  But LSU still looked pretty good.Hard to see a weakness with this team.

Vandy: Bag of anchored turds

Tennessee:  The Penis strikes again.  How in the blazing orange hell do you lose when you're up by three, your opponent has the ball at their OWN EIGHT YARD LINE and there are just 47 seconds left?  Well, first you give up a 12-yard run.  Then you surrender a 64 yard pass with 31 seconds left. Then you let them get to the line and spike the ball with five seconds left in order to set up a tying 33 yard field goal.  Then after you swap TD possessions in OT, you gain two yards on three plays in the second OT, kick a field goal and then let them mow through your defense for a winning TD in three plays.  BYU 29, Tennessee 23.  This is the same BYU that got skull raped by Utah in the opener.  Tennessee is a terrible football team.  Too bad they don't play Michigan.

Outside the SEC:
Michigan: Warmed over wolverine vomit.  One of the most overhyped teams ever.  Harbaugh blows.  Should have lost to Army even before overtime.  This is a really bad team.

FSU:  Garbage. Should have lost.  Bury this team next to Tennessee.

Syracuse: Ranked donkey piss. Get out of the Top 25.

The Entire Pac12: Douche water.  Watered down douche water.  Except maybe Utah. They may just be plain douche water.  None of those teams would have a win in the SEC unless they played Tennessee or Vandy.

North Carolina:  Ha.  Screw you Miami.  You're 0-2.  Mack is Back. Get down with Brown. Not a great team, but Mack is enjoying his second life. Or third, however many it is. 

Oregon: Bounced back and scored 77 on some limp dick pus bag. No, wait.  They racked 77 on Nevada, who beat Purdue, who fist-raped Vanderbilt.  So maybe that wasn't terrible.  The Ducks are right back in the playoff race! 

Nebraska:  Should have lost to South Alabama.  Did lose to freaking Colorado.  Get out of the Top 25.  Didn't belong there to begin with.  Tom Osborne is dead and he's not coming back.  Or is he?  I don't know.  It doesn't matter. Nebraska sucks. 

This whole thing makes me tired.  I really don't enjoy it like I used to, want to, wish I did. 

The Firing Line:

Gus should be on it.  Don't guess he is.

Manny Diaz getting that warm ass already.

Scott Frost isn't feeling frosty.

Penis Pruitt might as well put his house on the market and have a yard sale. He's done.  I don't think he makes it to the end of the year.  Phil Fulmer makes his big return. 

Muschamp got a vote of confidence.  Bye!

Jim Harbaugh can pack his khakis. After his team gets punked by Penn State, gets its eye dotted by OSU and loses a couple of others?  He's out.

[jmar]

Total agreement. Makes me tired too.
Barely worth watching.

Offensive line plays one quarter of decent football due to fact that the guards started pulling which allowed for some positive outside yards. We can't run the ball between the tackles.
Everything on this team says contender except for this unit and no it's not going to improve. Sadly there's no way to hide this deficiency.

Yeah I'm happy with a win but this problem is going to bite us in the ass.

[The Six]

Anybody know how badly Seth Williams is hurt? Losing him would suck beyond the telling of it. Nix's only remaining options are white lightning concussion Hastings and hair metal band bassist, Cannella. 

[GH2001]

The oline regressed from the 2nd half last week. Badly. Against a more inferior team. Although Tulane isn’t as bad as some think. At least last week they got better as the game went on. That didn’t really happen last night. What worried me was that it was mostly run blocking that went south. Not good. Not in his conference. And even though he’s a baller, and I like the kid - you can tell Nix is still a freshman. Limp Dick wr core and all. Not sure what the deal is with Seth Williams. Schwartz should be back soon though. Right now we have no vertical threats. 


Tennessee , Florida state - hilarious. They are worse than we were in 2012. At least that year we pounded the cupcakes. Those two teams are struggling in that aspect. 

[wesfau2]

I take it all back.

[GH2001]

I take it all back.

I’d like to go back and rewatch not 12 beers deep. The play by play folks kept talking of Tulanes salty front 7. Are they? Maybe. More than Oregon? No. Maybe better conditioned to the heat moreso than Oregon.

But just to my naked eye, half drunk, first look last night - they looked like they were sleepwalking. I’m not sure if Tulane schematically took advantage of Auburn’s lack of vertical threat or what. But they didn’t look good. All game long. 

[jmar]

I’d like to go back and rewatch not 12 beers deep. The play by play folks kept talking of Tulanes salty front 7. Are they? Maybe. More than Oregon? No. Maybe better conditioned to the heat moreso than Oregon.

But just to my naked eye, half drunk, first look last night - they looked like they were sleepwalking. I’m not sure if Tulane schematically took advantage of Auburn’s lack of vertical threat or what. But they didn’t look good. All game long.

Wished I were half gassed. They can't block for shit and I bet every one of them grade out near 90. 

[Kaos]

The best part of yesterday? 

1) The Texas QB's mom (who looks really whorish) celebrating a dropped pass. 
https://twitter.com/i/status/1170492976759488513

2) McBonghay's 'Fuck' acceptance that the Wronghores lost.  
https://twitter.com/i/status/1170536929068236800

3. The crying, cursing Texas kid.  Lots of profanity.  They showed him twice and he laid it on both times. 

[Buzz Killington]

I'm not the best at the lip reading, but I thought little man was dropping the f bombs every time they showed him.  Stay weird, Austin.

[GH2001]

I'm not the best at the lip reading, but I thought little man was dropping the f bombs every time they showed him.  Stay weird, Austin.

I thought it was snags from last night. 

[jmar]

Somebody missed their naptime.

[djsimp]

I take it all back.

Feeling the same. The OL play was straight stupid....along with the play calling. 

[Snaggletiger]

As I said in my Two Lane thread, this would be no easy task.  The O-line sucks.  Yes.  And God forbid I make excuses.  But their entire front 7 returned, every one of them.  And they weren't half bad last year.  

Now...jmar made the point that we didnt start getting the running game going until we pulled the guards and went outside.  Great observation.  So why the fuck did we have 1st and 5 in the first half and run it up the middle....same play....for 4 yards and a turnover?  That's on Gus.  The ridiculous runs between the tackles in the first half were inexcusable.  Thank God he...or someone...saw the light.

Nix?  Love him.  As I've said many times, there will be bumps in the road.  But he's our long term answer.  He'll keep getting better and better with each start.  Patience.  Despite Gus, he's going to be damn good.

[jmar]

As I said in my Two Lane thread, this would be no easy task.  The O-line sucks.  Yes.  And God forbid I make excuses.  But their entire front 7 returned, every one of them.  And they weren't half bad last year. 

Now...jmar made the point that we didnt start getting the running game going until we pulled the guards and went outside.  Great observation.  So why the fuck did we have 1st and 5 in the first half and run it up the middle....same play....for 4 yards and a turnover?  That's on Gus.  The ridiculous runs between the tackles in the first half were inexcusable.  Thank God he...or someone...saw the light.

Nix?  Love him.  As I've said many times, there will be bumps in the road.  But he's our long term answer.  He'll keep getting better and better with each start.  Patience.  Despite Gus, he's going to be damn good.

Love Nix too. Hope to God he eventually ad libs to the down and distance as it suits him.
Can't Rick Trickett the offensive line, can't pull on every run play and nobody would dare run misdirection to disguise where we are running.
We don't even have a favorite side that most coaches have supreme confidence in when you have to get two yards.
The old backside read that Chip used was dynamite but it demands different reads and someone like Marshall to pull it off.
We've all heard that Kerryon stuck a foot down and picked a seam but our backs don't have that luxury. It collapses in front of them and most positive gains are generally the defender running himself out of the play, not playing disciplined...and truly that's all most teams have to do to force us to throw.

We can beat teams where we have a definite talent advantage because we have a really good defense.

[wesfau2]

I'm not giving up on the running game until DJ Williams gets a chance.

[bottomfeeder]

Defensive coordinators have figured out that if everyone stays home (except linebackers and defensive backs), they can beat Gus' offense.

Projections after week two.

https://www.saturdaydownsouth.com/auburn-football/espns-fpi-predicts-auburns-remaining-games/?fbclid=IwAR0x_W8XS-LYpFwMUGU2F57q6Flh_szp2hl6QHFwJSKU7Ud4bHqycIX4I-0

[Snaggletiger]

I'm not giving up on the running game until DJ Williams gets a chance.

This...fucking this.  Sometimes you need to give it to someone who knows how to hit the hole hard.  I'm too old to take hand offs.

[CCTAU]

And we've yet to see a back break it outside when the middle is clogged!
I had someone ask me today what was wrong with Boobee the first half. They said he looked like he wasn't running hard.

[jmar]

And we've yet to see a back break it outside when the middle is clogged!
I had someone ask me today what was wrong with Boobies the first half. They said he looked like he wasn't running hard.

Really trust Cadillac as opposed to the other offensive coaches. I still think Whitlow is our best bet. Martin's okay.
Shivers is a breakaway threat but is only good for a handful of carrys plus he whiffs too much in protection.
We could be in trouble without Boobee. 
Haven't seen DJ Williams although I don't know that Cadillac himself could be effective with these statues up front.
And this>
I hate the way Gus brings in personnel for certain plays which teams have to spot. 
So when Joiner comes in he's going to run a wheel route, Schenker...a tight end drag etc...very predictable. And opposing teams know Gus only tries something once. He's just too damn predictable.

[chinook]

i’m going on a limb (rotten Bradford pear) ...Gus is fucking up running back U.   

gus playbook doesn’t hit the hole fast and furious. it gives defenses time to set, push and clog any hole.  

i watched most of the game on playback today...another area of concern that doesn’t get mentioned is punt coverage.