Tigers X - Number one Source to Talk Auburn Tigers Sports

#relationshipgoals

Buzz Killington

  • *
  • 22899
  • Bofa
#relationshipgoals
« on: June 05, 2019, 10:22:36 AM »
I fully expect to read a real article like this about someone on this site in a few years

https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/elderly-couple-accidentally-burns-house-down-during-sex-game-involving-ww2-flamethrower/?fbclid=IwAR2rJ45yu3zLdJGOJKrF5xDPOnUd7v6XphPfRooHw60HUer5zNATPH6tBn0

Sand Springs, Oklahoma | A couple’s sexual game turned horribly wrong this morning, as they accidentally burned their house to the ground with a 75-year old flamethrower.
Firefighters were called on the site around 11:15 this morning after receiving an unusual phone call but could do nothing to save the 45-year old house from being a total loss.
Nancy Brown, the 911 operator who answered the call from 96-year old Maurice Fogerty, says she first thought she was dealing with pranksters when he told her he had “torched the house with napalm while having sex with his wife”.
Quote
“He told me he was penetrating his wife with his M1, as usual, but got too excited and activated the flamethrower.”
Ms. Brown says the explanation shocked her for a moment, and it took her almost a minute to realize it was actually true.
Quote
“He kept repeating that everything was burning and I could hear his wife screaming behind him, but I still couldn’t believe this could be real.”
Mr. Fogerty and his wife were transported to the hospital to be treated for the psychological shock caused by the event but are otherwise uninjured.
They shouldn’t face any criminal charges. but may have problems when it comes to claiming their insurance policies, as damage caused by the use of weapons during sex games is rarely covered.
A case involving a Gatling gun in 2004 and another involving a rocket launcher in 2011 have made their way to court, and in both cases the insurance company didn’t have to pay anything to the claimants.


friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

ssgaufan

  • ***
  • 4123
  • WDE!!!
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #1 on: June 05, 2019, 10:40:18 AM »
Not sure what shocks me the most.  The use of a flame thrower as a dildo, or the fact that a 96 year old is waaaaay kinkier than I am.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions

Godfather

  • Chapter
  • ****
  • 21263
  • He knows!
    • Tigers X
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #2 on: June 05, 2019, 11:50:52 AM »
Not sure what shocks me the most.  The use of a flame thrower as a dildo, or the fact that a 96 year old is waaaaay kinkier than I am.
It should be that it's a fake news site, Buzz continues to fool people on.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
Gus is gone, hooray!
                       -Auburn Fans


Auburn Forum

Buzz Killington

  • *
  • 22899
  • Bofa
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #3 on: June 05, 2019, 02:12:15 PM »
It should be that it's a fake news site, Buzz continues to fool people on.
It's just so much fun though.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

ssgaufan

  • ***
  • 4123
  • WDE!!!
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #4 on: June 05, 2019, 02:32:09 PM »
It should be that it's a fake news site, Buzz continues to fool people on.
Fuck Buzz, and fuck Georgia
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions

Saniflush

  • Pledge Master
  • ****
  • 21656
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #5 on: June 05, 2019, 02:47:17 PM »
Fuck Buzz, and fuck Georgia
With a flamethrower?
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

ssgaufan

  • ***
  • 4123
  • WDE!!!
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #6 on: June 05, 2019, 03:03:48 PM »
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions

Buzz Killington

  • *
  • 22899
  • Bofa
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #7 on: June 05, 2019, 04:15:16 PM »
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

bottomfeeder

  • ***
  • 4681
  • We're screwed.
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #8 on: June 06, 2019, 08:47:21 PM »
The police have released an artist rendering of the couple.

« Last Edit: June 07, 2019, 05:07:10 PM by bottomfeeder »
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions

AUTiger1

  • ****
  • 9872
  • Eat a Peach
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #9 on: June 07, 2019, 04:36:30 PM »
Kind of thought this thread would be about that guy at the site not mentioned.  Didn't she try to burn his house odwn or did burn his house down?
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

There are gonna be days when you lay your guts on the line and you come away empty handed, there ain't a damn thing you can do about it but go back out there and lay em on the line again...and again, and again! -- Coach Pat Dye

It isn't that liberals are ignorant. It's just they know so much that isn't so. --Ronald Reagan

Snaggletiger

  • *
  • 44623
  • My Fighting Pearls
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #10 on: June 07, 2019, 04:49:45 PM »
Kind of thought this thread would be about that guy at the site not mentioned.  Didn't she try to burn his house odwn or did burn his house down?
She's getting a new She-Shed

Image result for Watch it burn images
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Buzz Killington

  • *
  • 22899
  • Bofa
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #11 on: June 10, 2019, 09:23:46 AM »
Kind of thought this thread would be about that guy at the site not mentioned.  Didn't she try to burn his house odwn or did burn his house down?
Right after the S&M cruise too.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

AUTiger1

  • ****
  • 9872
  • Eat a Peach
Re: #relationshipgoals
« Reply #12 on: June 10, 2019, 05:40:06 PM »
Right after the S&M cruise too.

I need to take Ms. AUT1 on a cruise and get one of those kick ass glamour shots for the office. 
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

There are gonna be days when you lay your guts on the line and you come away empty handed, there ain't a damn thing you can do about it but go back out there and lay em on the line again...and again, and again! -- Coach Pat Dye

It isn't that liberals are ignorant. It's just they know so much that isn't so. --Ronald Reagan