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The Simplest Things Can Put You Down

Snaggletiger

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The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« on: September 21, 2018, 12:25:53 PM »
Monday, I'm going to have my first tooth pulled.  I've been lucky and always taken care of my choppers.  A few cavities here and there but never dealt with anything major.  The dentist I go to does more cosmetic work than anything else.  I go to him for check ups, cleanings etc.  A couple of years ago, I had him look at a tooth in the very back that I could tell was chipped.  It was my top, right wisdom tooth.  He looked and said it's actually cracked and should come out.  He doesn't do extractions so he referred me to an oral surgeon.  He looks at it and says no problem, just make an appointment when I'm ready.  BTW, it was giving me zero problems so I just let it rock on.  I'm talking almost a year's worth of rock on. 

Late last year, I'm sitting in my office and got tazed right in the jaw.  I mean a frickin' electric shock wave hit me like a ton of bricks out of the blue.  The shock waves and pain would last for about an hour before they would subside.  This would sometimes happen 2-3 times a day.  Sometimes once every few days.  My dentist thought it might be a sinus infection so I saw an ENT.  Nope.  I went to my regular doc and she said it sounded like "Trigeminal Neuralgia".  Oh dear God, no.  I had already done the obligatory Google search with my symptoms and was scared to death that that was what it was.  That's affectionately called the Suicide disease.  No cure for it and when it gets full blown, your life is sitting in a dark room, pounding pain killers dealing with constant shock waves ripping through your face.  Then, as fast as it jumped on me, the episodes stopped for months, until a few weeks ago. 

Long, cool story, bro short, after being seen by another doc, the cause/solution was simple.  Half of that cracked tooth had broken off and I have an exposed nerve. Hopefully, Monday will be the end of it, because it gets real old, real fast to have the wife walk in and see me clutching a pillow with tears rolling down, looking like a 6 year old who didn't get that bike for his birthday. 

Speaking of sinus infections, I've had one in my life.  I started having increasingly bad headaches every day to the point that I couldn't function at all.  Of course, I was certain I had a brain tumor.  Turns out IT'S NOT A TOOMAH.  It was a bad sinus infection.  Never really knew what they were until then.  People used to say, "I have a sinus infection". I'd think, oh go blow your nose you big baby.  Wrong!  
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

CCTAU

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #1 on: September 21, 2018, 12:38:03 PM »
Old people sometimes smell too. You might want to check....
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Five statements of WISDOM
1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the wealth out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friends, is the beginning of the end of any nation.

Saniflush

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #2 on: September 21, 2018, 01:04:08 PM »
Best talk I ever had with a dentist was with the one I have right now.  I despise dentists and always have.  (had a great uncle in the family who was a dentist and didn't believe in Novocaine)
I told the current one that if he hurt me when he was working on my teeth I was going to straight up punch him in the throat.   We have an understanding.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

CCTAU

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #3 on: September 21, 2018, 01:23:42 PM »
Best talk I ever had with a dentist was with the one I have right now.  I despise dentists and always have.  (had a great uncle in the family who was a dentist and didn't believe in Novocaine)
I told the current one that if he hurt me when he was working on my teeth I was going to straight up punch him in the throat.  We have an understanding.
I would laugh at you and tell you to go home. Come back when you need me. By then you'll be hurting so bad you won't even notice if I cause you pain!

"I used to offend my teeth, Then my teeth started to offend me back!"
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Five statements of WISDOM
1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the wealth out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friends, is the beginning of the end of any nation.

Snaggletiger

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #4 on: September 21, 2018, 02:31:01 PM »
I would laugh at you and tell you to go home. Come back when you need me. By then you'll be hurting so bad you won't even notice if I cause you pain!

"I used to offend my teeth, Then my teeth started to offend me back!"
Yeah, this was a situation where he said you might need a root canal. I said, "Start drilling".  I'm telling you when this nerve pain hits, I just want to be put down like a rabid, stray dog.

Best dentist I ever had was in Montgomery years ago.  When he had a cavity to fill, he would hand me a menu with all kinds of music to select from.  Once I made my selections, he gave me headphones and turned up the gas.  He'd finish and I'd say NOOOOOOOO.....you need to find some more shit wrong in my mouth.  Fix something.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

WiregrassTiger

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #5 on: September 21, 2018, 03:12:42 PM »
There are several people here that I’d love to help extract their teeth.
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CCTAU

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #6 on: September 21, 2018, 03:17:15 PM »
Bunch of damn sissies. I've had wooden teeth for years!
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Five statements of WISDOM
1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the wealth out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friends, is the beginning of the end of any nation.

Snaggletiger

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #7 on: September 21, 2018, 03:25:21 PM »
Bunch of damn sissies. I've had wooden teeth for years!
Image result for Wooden teeth images
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

WiregrassTiger

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #8 on: September 21, 2018, 07:19:35 PM »
Image result for Wooden teeth images
I never understood how Prowler got the nickname “splinterdick”. Now, we know.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #9 on: September 24, 2018, 04:29:22 PM »
Well now, that was fun.  Had that chopper yanked out of my skull about 90 minutes ago.  First tooth I've ever had pulled.  The procedure was pretty quick. A couple of minutes at most.  The worst part was despite the numbing gel, that shot on the inside of my jaw felt like a yellow jacket got loose in my mouth.  Now, I'm just posting on the X and spitting blood into a bottle every 3-4 minutes. 

Filled my pain killer Rx and stopped at the Lick Her store to get a little sumpn' for when the numbing shot wears off.  All I know is if it fixed that nerve pain, I'm gonna' be one happy Snags. 
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #10 on: September 24, 2018, 05:13:54 PM »
Snags, worst pain I ever had was when I needed a root canal.  Went into the dentist, and he told me he needed to push me back a day.  I told him to give me some good drugs, because I was about 10 minutes away from tying a bootlace to a doorknob and taking care of it myself.

They gave me the same shit they gave Mrs AUJ when she got a C-section.
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Godfather

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #11 on: September 24, 2018, 05:48:01 PM »
Snags, worst pain I ever had was when I needed a root canal.  Went into the dentist, and he told me he needed to push me back a day.  I told him to give me some good drugs, because I was about 10 minutes away from tying a bootlace to a doorknob and taking care of it myself.

They gave me the same shit they gave Mrs AUJ when she got a C-section.
Sperm?
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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #12 on: September 24, 2018, 06:33:12 PM »
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GH2001

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #13 on: September 24, 2018, 07:14:00 PM »
Snags, worst pain I ever had was when I needed a root canal.  Went into the dentist, and he told me he needed to push me back a day.  I told him to give me some good drugs, because I was about 10 minutes away from tying a bootlace to a doorknob and taking care of it myself.

They gave me the same shit they gave Mrs AUJ when she got a C-section.
Same here

never begged so hard for a root canal in my life. It’s almost instant relief. 
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WDE

Saniflush

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #14 on: September 25, 2018, 08:14:47 AM »
Well now, that was fun.  Had that chopper yanked out of my skull about 90 minutes ago.  First tooth I've ever had pulled.  The procedure was pretty quick. A couple of minutes at most.  The worst part was despite the numbing gel, that shot on the inside of my jaw felt like a yellow jacket got loose in my mouth.  Now, I'm just posting on the X and spitting blood into a bottle every 3-4 minutes.

Filled my pain killer Rx and stopped at the Lick Her store to get a little sumpn' for when the numbing shot wears off.  All I know is if it fixed that nerve pain, I'm gonna' be one happy Snags.
Your shitty teeth are probably due to drinking fucking Coke in your bourbon.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Snaggletiger

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #15 on: September 25, 2018, 09:26:03 AM »
Image result for Bourbon and coke images
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Godfather

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #16 on: September 25, 2018, 09:35:50 AM »
Image result for Bourbon and coke images
That's good bourbon why would you put that poison in it?  Like I might give you a pass on putting coke in Jack Daniels cause it's shitty, but COME ON MAN!  Do better.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #17 on: September 25, 2018, 09:45:53 AM »
See how the two look so cozy together?  They were meant for each other.  Just add a few ice cubes and you've got a party.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Saniflush

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Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #18 on: September 25, 2018, 10:45:50 AM »
Image result for Bourbon and coke images
The only bullet you should get should be from a weapon, because of your poor life choices.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Re: The Simplest Things Can Put You Down
« Reply #19 on: September 25, 2018, 10:51:32 AM »
The only bullet you should get should be from a weapon, because of your poor life choices.
I can't wait until Snags is nominated for SCOTUS, and the left digs into his past.

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