Fifty five years ago today, Jay Jacobs was spawned upon this earth. Happy Birthday, fuckhole.
The question that has to be asked as we "celebrate" your life thus far is this: Is Auburn better for having known you?
I don't know that it is.
It's not just football. It's everything.
When I was a kid we went to Auburn, found a place to park, cooked out, went to the game, played in the grass, went to J&M to buy some stuff. We sat in our seats in the bleachers, bought crappy hot dogs, cokes and peanuts and had fun in the stands. We heard the band play. It was crowded. It was chaotic. It was a family atmosphere. We were all one big family. Some of my best memories are of those games. When I think about those times it's the band, the grass, the sun that are the tableau.
That was what I took my kids to do. I still remember a friend of my daughters bursting into tears when he saw Carnell and Ronnie sitting in Applebees one night after an afternoon game. They were gracious and funny and engaging. Made that kid's day by talking to him.
Now? The last ten years or so? It's all been turned into a corporate experience. There are only certain places you can park. Big money boosters have reserved spaces. There's a parking deck. The stadium experience now includes shit like Dreamland (Tuscaloosa for fuck's sake) and that pro-footballesque ridiculous television. i haven't been, but I've seen countless people say it drowns out the band. Fuck that. Turn it off.
I hate Jay Jacobs -- that is documented -- but I swear to God, the difference between his smarmy nancy-pants attitude is so far removed from the "I love Auburn and her cherished traditions" attitude of David Housel that is makes me vomit every time I see his fucking cheese-eating face. He's the antithesis of Housel. David was a southern gentleman, an Auburn man who treated everybody from the cleanup crew to the COO of the Sugar Bowl with the same respect. He had humility, grace, dignity and personality. Jacobs is an asshole. He's a snobbish fuck who struts through the pressbox like he's better than people. David Housel had a knack for making you feel like you were the most important person in the room. Jacobs lets you know nobody is more important than he is.
That doesn't have anything to do with the football debacle. But it might. He hired Gene Chizik primarily because they were the same church denomination. I don't think he's very smart. I think he's got too many hands shoved up his ass (Jimmy Rane's for one). I don't think he had the experience or gravitas to do the job. He was a fucking ticket selling smarm-shit for fuck's sake before being named AD. There is no AD in the country any less prepared for that job than he was.
He's ruining the Auburn I remember and the one I love.
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