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Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!

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AUTiger1

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Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« on: June 21, 2014, 10:35:47 AM »
That is unless you want to take a chance of getting knocked up by simps super sperm. 

Happy Birthday Fucker!  May your day be filled with sex.....wait, I am not going to wish that upon your poor wife.  So may you day be filled with booze and fun!  Have a good one!
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Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

There are gonna be days when you lay your guts on the line and you come away empty handed, there ain't a damn thing you can do about it but go back out there and lay em on the line again...and again, and again! -- Coach Pat Dye

It isn't that liberals are ignorant. It's just they know so much that isn't so. --Ronald Reagan

djsimp

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #1 on: June 21, 2014, 10:49:27 AM »
Thank you thank you. Since I am such a generous gent, I'm giving free babies to er'ryone.
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Saniflush

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #2 on: June 21, 2014, 11:06:10 AM »
Happy birthday and keep your jizz to yourself.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Buzz Killington

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #3 on: June 21, 2014, 11:50:09 AM »
Quote from: Saniflush on June 21, 2014, 11:06:10 AM
Happy birthday and keep your jizz to yourself.

He fuckin' made jizz in your magazine
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

The Six

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #4 on: June 21, 2014, 02:23:19 PM »
Happy Birthday
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"I'm sick of following my dreams...I'm just going to ask them where they are going and hook up with 'em later." - Mitch Hedberg

djsimp

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #5 on: June 21, 2014, 02:28:06 PM »
My thoughts drift back to erect nipple wet dreams about Mary Jane Rottencrotch and the Great Homecoming Fuck Fantasy. I am so happy that I am alive, in one piece and short. I'm in a world of shit... yes. But I am alive. And I am not afraid.
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AWK

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #6 on: June 21, 2014, 02:54:36 PM »
May your day be filled with tears, blood, and cum.
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Redskins cornerback DeAngelo Hall said, "Guys don't mind hitting Michael Vick in the open field, but when you see Cam, you have to think about how you're going to tackle him. He's like a big tight end coming at you."

Pell City Tiger

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #7 on: June 21, 2014, 07:46:15 PM »
Happy birthday, fucker!
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"I stood up, unzipped my pants, lowered my shorts and placed my bare ass on the window. That's the last thing I wanted those people to see of me."

djsimp

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #8 on: June 21, 2014, 09:41:21 PM »
Been a good one!
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Vandy Vol

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #9 on: June 22, 2014, 08:48:00 PM »
Happy belated birthday!  You'll probably be getting a present in 9 months...
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GH2001

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #10 on: June 23, 2014, 09:22:57 AM »
Quote from: Vandy Vol on June 22, 2014, 08:48:00 PM
Happy belated birthday!  You'll probably be getting a present in 9 months...

He can't say he isnt used to it by now.
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WDE

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #11 on: June 23, 2014, 10:35:34 AM »
Happy Belated Sperm Machine!!!
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Tiger Wench

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #12 on: June 23, 2014, 12:02:28 PM »
I waited until today to post in hopes that your sperm supply was not yet fully recovered.

Hope it was awesome.
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djsimp

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #13 on: June 23, 2014, 01:12:18 PM »
It was a good. Much gracias to er'one. I am spending the day drinking lots of protein supplements to get back to 100%.
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djsimp

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Re: Happy Birthday! Ladies beware of entering this thread!
« Reply #14 on: June 23, 2014, 01:15:59 PM »
Quote from: GH2001 on June 23, 2014, 09:22:57 AM
He can't say he isnt used to it by now.

Thing is, I don't think anyone can ever get use to that feeling. Its a "o shit" and a "yay" all wrapped up into one panic. Good news is, I know enough by now to hide all of that so my wife doesn't kick my ass.
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