For you Twatters

[Tiger Wench]

I need some interesting folks to follow.  Not people who are nothing but retweets. Funny, provocative, witty.

Aaaand... Go.

[Vandy Vol]

I need some interesting folks to follow.  Not people who are nothing but retweets. Funny, provocative, witty.

Aaaand... Go.

Chizad.  He's not funny, provocative, or witty, but you can't beat Twitter battles.

[Buzz Killington]

@GhostHarryCaray
@FakeProwler
@TheAuburner

[Tiger Wench]

@GhostHarryCaray
@FakeProwler
@TheAuburner

Oh, I already hit up that @FakeProwler - friended him right away. I hear he's a hottie that has a thing for me - but don't tell him that I know. One of them fake innerweb flings, you know. 

[wesfau2]

Patton Oswalt is one of the funniest people on Twitter.

Neil DeGrasse Tyson is always interesting and space-nerdy.

Carrie Brownstein
Ana Gasteyer
Dalai Lama
Glenn Howerton
Aaron Bliztstein
Conan O'brien
Andy Richter
Eugene Mirman
Michael Ian Black
Texts from Last Night
Daniel Tosh
Sarah Silverman
All the Archer Characters: Sterling Archer, Pam Poovey, Cheryl Tunt, Dr. Algernop Krieger, Mallory Archer...and Babou the Ocelot.

[Tiger Wench]

Thanks, Wes, for that list!  I follow Tosh but I will give the others a try.

[Buzz Killington]

Texts from last night is great, but they tweet about as much as that Fake Prowler guy

[dallaswareagle]

@dallaswareagle


There is nothing on it, but what is on it is damn funny.

[GH2001]

Glenn Howerton is funny. And I hear he used to eat tater tots in HS with War Eagle!!!.

Sean Patrick Flannery is quirky too.

[wesfau2]

OH....can't believe I left off Karl Welzein (@DadBoner).

It'll take a little while to catch on to the players, but shit is hysterical.

[AUChizad]

Accounts I follow that I usually don't ignore. Big ass list, cause I just scrolled through everyone I follow. I probably missed some because this was a cursory scroll.

@TheAuburner
@jimdunaway
@pennjillette
@AndrewWK
@michaelianblack
@SarahKSilverman
@thomaslennon
@jumbo77
@TheProwler64
@SteveMartinToGo
@danieltosh
@JayGTate
@FearlessandTrue
@GlennHowerton
@sethmeyers
@louisck
@colecubelic
@DennisDMZ
@rickygervais
@GreggDoyelCBS
@billmaher
@GovGaryJohnson
@thejuiceisgood
@JHokanson
@ders808
@ADAMDEVINE
@UncleBlazer
@kurt_loder
@byjustinlee
@wareaglereader
@LSUFreek
@JonHuntsman
@BunkiePerkins
@notthefakeSVP
@CoachTonyBarbee
@CharlesRobinson
@wareagleextra
@LonelyTailgater
@blakeells
@SethMacFarlane
@Deadspin
@CoachKaribiDede
@AUPPL
@shelbyfero
@VanAllenPlexico
@DannyZuker
@JasonDufner
@Aubielicious
@JennyJohnsonHi5
@robdelaney
@thecajunboy
@evil_cam_newton
@rosscollings
@robpate
@Sethrogen
@meganamram
@willcollier
@AUlteredEgo
@DyeHardAU
@AuburnMemes
@BoJackson
@RedditCFB
@adamcarolla
@LarryLankLank
@KevinHart4real
@wherring54
@VoiceofAUTigers
@DONNIEinCULLMAN
@AUOwnsU
@neiltyson
@KennedyNation
@marcmaron
@Mengus22
@auburnredwing
@JordanPeele
@wardamnlegal
@EliBraden
@SeinfeldToday
@j_newcastle
@BobbyBigWheel
@CoachGusMalzahn
@acethemoreuknow
@WarBlogle
@jeff_poor
@smartfootball
@nickgillespie
@TwitchyTeam
@exjon
@wesfau2
@ScrogginsNoggin
@coach_G29
@JohnCarvalhoAU
@JerryHinnen
@iowahawkblog
@lawblob
@mattytalks
@StatTiger
@tim_cook
@desusnice
@IsolatedBammers
@willlochamy
@mrlochamy
@maddoxrules
@BurritoBrosShit
@kmele

[AWK]

Accounts I follow that I usually don't ignore. Big ass list, cause I just scrolled through everyone I follow. I probably missed some because this was a cursory scroll.

@TheAuburner
@jimdunaway
@pennjillette
@AndrewWK
@michaelianblack
@SarahKSilverman
@thomaslennon
@jumbo77
@TheProwler64
@SteveMartinToGo
@danieltosh
@JayGTate
@FearlessandTrue
@GlennHowerton
@sethmeyers
@louisck
@colecubelic
@DennisDMZ
@rickygervais
@GreggDoyelCBS
@billmaher
@GovGaryJohnson
@thejuiceisgood
@JHokanson
@ders808
@ADAMDEVINE
@UncleBlazer
@kurt_loder
@byjustinlee
@wareaglereader
@LSUFreek
@JonHuntsman
@BunkiePerkins
@notthefakeSVP
@CoachTonyBarbee
@CharlesRobinson
@wareagleextra
@LonelyTailgater
@blakeells
@SethMacFarlane
@Deadspin
@CoachKaribiDede
@AUPPL
@shelbyfero
@VanAllenPlexico
@DannyZuker
@JasonDufner
@Aubielicious
@JennyJohnsonHi5
@robdelaney
@thecajunboy
@evil_cam_newton
@rosscollings
@robpate
@Sethrogen
@meganamram
@willcollier
@AUlteredEgo
@DyeHardAU
@AuburnMemes
@BoJackson
@RedditCFB
@adamcarolla
@LarryLankLank
@KevinHart4real
@wherring54
@VoiceofAUTigers
@DONNIEinCULLMAN
@AUOwnsU
@neiltyson
@KennedyNation
@marcmaron
@Mengus22
@auburnredwing
@JordanPeele
@wardamnlegal
@EliBraden
@SeinfeldToday
@j_newcastle
@BobbyBigWheel
@CoachGusMalzahn
@acethemoreuknow
@WarBlogle
@jeff_poor
@smartfootball
@nickgillespie
@TwitchyTeam
@exjon
@wesfau2
@ScrogginsNoggin
@coach_G29
@JohnCarvalhoAU
@JerryHinnen
@iowahawkblog
@lawblob
@mattytalks
@StatTiger
@tim_cook
@desusnice
@IsolatedBammers
@willlochamy
@mrlochamy
@maddoxrules
@BurritoBrosShit
@kmele

Chizad follows gay dudes.  You heard it here first.

[Tiger Wench]

Chizad.  Dude.

You twatter battle all those people?  When do you sleep???

[AUChizad]

Chizad follows gay dudes.  You heard it here first.

@TheProwler64?

Chizad.  Dude.

You twatter battle all those people?  When do you sleep???

That's less than 10% of my follows.

If you're not following at least 1,000 people, you're doing it wrong.

[DnATL]

If you're not following at least 1,000 people, you're doing it wrong.

That's what your mom says

[Tiger Wench]

@TheProwler64?
That's less than 10% of my follows.

If you're not following at least 1,000 people, you're doing it wrong.

I'd rather follow 1000 elephants with a broom and a bucket.

Man, I love you, you know that, but... Wow. 1000 people?  A life. Get one of your own. No one needs to read 140 character snippets from the brains of that many people, most of which you do not know and never will.  How do you have that much time in a day? (That is not a rhetorical question - I really want to know...)

I follow like 40 people IF that, and I know many of them personally.  I appreciate only the choicest of witty tweets, and almost always block retweets (other than AU athletics ones).  I will try some of the ones you and weskie recommended, but after a little bit, if I am not amused?  He gone. Life's too short.

Decade differences, I guess.  I'm not a different generation, technically, but sometimes I feel like it. Now get off my lawn...

[AUChizad]

I'd rather follow 1000 elephants with a broom and a bucket.

Man, I love you, you know that, but... Wow. 1000 people?  A life. Get one of your own. No one needs to read 140 character snippets from the brains of that many people, most of which you do not know and never will.  How do you have that much time in a day? (That is not a rhetorical question - I really want to know...)

I follow like 40 people IF that, and I know many of them personally.  I appreciate only the choicest of witty tweets, and almost always block retweets (other than AU athletics ones).  I will try some of the ones you and weskie recommended, but after a little bit, if I am not amused?  He gone. Life's too short.

Decade differences, I guess.  I'm not a different generation, technically, but sometimes I feel like it. Now get off my lawn...

I'm currently following 1,551. When I see a new interesting account, I add them.

No one says you have to read every single tweet in your timeline.

You're thinking about it wrong if you think you do.

When I hit refresh, I'll see something guaranteed to be new and fresh while it might be 30 minutes between individual tweets on yours. If I'm stuck in an elevator or something where I'd otherwise be bored out of my mind, by the time I've read everything since the refresh picks up and I get to the top, I hit refresh again and there's a whole new set of entertainment. I get different perspectives on things going on. See different jokes by different people on whatever the current event of the minute is.

I don't follow random regular Joes. Of the 393 people that follow me, I probably follow less than 100 back, because they're completely uninteresting regular people who offer little less than retweets to things I already see from the original source or some mundane bullshit about what they had to eat that day. That's not what Twitter's for. I follow back the ones I know or ones that are funny and interesting or informative or relevant to my interests. It's not like Facebook. Think of it as a news source primarily. The more you follow, the more you are made aware of.

I mostly follow comedians, comedy writers, sportswriters, athletes (Never high school. Rarely current college players. All they offer is generic #RiseAndGrind and shit like that), satirists, musicians and bands I like, politicians and pundits I either like or am fascinated by, news sites, restaurants, bars, and breweries I like, accounts for festivals that go on around New Orleans, etc. I follow people who have funny or insightful things to say about Auburn, the Saints, politics, general things going on in New Orleans, things going on in Birmingham, beer, bacon, titties, tech, and whatever else I may read and say "Hm. Didn't know that was going on." or "Hm. That's an interesting take."

[Vandy Vol]

I'm currently following 1,551. When I see a new interesting account, I add them.

No one says you have to read every single tweet in your timeline.

You're thinking about it wrong if you think you do.

When I hit refresh, I'll see something guaranteed to be new and fresh while it might be 30 minutes between individual tweets on yours. If I'm stuck in an elevator or something where I'd otherwise be bored out of my mind, by the time I've read everything since the refresh picks up and I get to the top, I hit refresh again and there's a whole new set of entertainment. I get different perspectives on things going on. See different jokes by different people on whatever the current event of the minute is.

I don't follow random regular Joes. Of the 393 people that follow me, I probably follow less than 100 back, because they're completely uninteresting regular people who offer little less than retweets to things I already see from the original source or some mundane bullshit about what they had to eat that day. That's not what Twitter's for. I follow back the ones I know or ones that are funny and interesting or informative or relevant to my interests. It's not like Facebook. Think of it as a news source primarily. The more you follow, the more you are made aware of.

I mostly follow comedians, comedy writers, sportswriters, athletes (Never high school. Rarely current college players. All they offer is generic #RiseAndGrind and shit like that), satirists, musicians and bands I like, politicians and pundits I either like or am fascinated by, news sites, restaurants, bars, and breweries I like, accounts for festivals that go on around New Orleans, etc. I follow people who have funny or insightful things to say about Auburn, the Saints, politics, general things going on in New Orleans, things going on in Birmingham, beer, bacon, titties, tech, and whatever else I may read and say "Hm. Didn't know that was going on." or "Hm. That's an interesting take."

Or, you could, like...talk to people in real life and stuff...or something.

[AUChizad]

Another note. The best way to figure out who to follow is by seeing who the people you do follow are interacting with, especially if they do so regularly. If the people you find interesting are interested enough in someone to engage with them, chances are they're interesting as well.

If you see Retweets from the same person come across your feed more than a couple of times, you'd probably be interested in following them.

You said you block retweets. Those are the best way to get information, and especially if you're looking for new accounts to follow. People most often RT the original source. Not doing that is basically plagiarism. Blocking Retweets on Twitter is like blocking pictures on Instagram. You're crippling the functionality, and again, doing it wrong.

[AUChizad]

Or, you could, like...talk to people in real life and stuff...or something.

I do. And when I do, I have plenty to talk about.