If I hear one more...

[Kaos]

One more comversation with a random bama fan that starts "I'm a bama fan but that was a great game. Y'all got us a little scared..."

I know you mean it as a compliment. That little old auburn could actually cause you some concern.

But the sheer arrogance that comment contains is enough to make me want to rip out your throat with my fingernails.

It happened in lowes five minutes ago and I envisioned taking a paint can and turning your skull into a bloody pulp the entire time you were tellin me how malzahn was doing good with the little bit of talent he had and how be was building the program with juco players and how saban kept his boys focused and how you were a little nervous about playing us. I wanted you dead.

[RWS]

One more comversation with a random bama fan that starts "I'm a bama fan but that was a great game. Y'all got us a little scared..."

I know you mean it as a compliment. That little old auburn could actually cause you some concern.

But the sheer arrogance that comment contains is enough to make me want to rip out your throat with my fingernails.

It happened in lowes five minutes ago and I envisioned taking a paint can and turning your skull into a bloody pulp the entire time you were tellin me how malzahn was doing good with the little bit of talent he had and how be was building the program with juco players and how saban kept his boys focused and how you were a little nervous about playing us. I wanted you dead.

I can't wait to see what topic you whine about tomorrow.  You must somehow attract these people, because you always have some sort of anecdote nearly every day.

[GH2001]

I can't wait to see what topic you whine about tomorrow.  You must somehow attract these people, because you always have some sort of anecdote nearly every day.

You do live in this state right?

You don't have to attract them. They are as plenty kudzu.

[Kaos]

I can't wait to see what topic you whine about tomorrow.  You must somehow attract these people, because you always have some sort of anecdote nearly every day.

You'll never understand because our fanbase doesn't act that way.  I've never in my life wandered up to a guy wearing a Bama shirt and said dick or shit about that program. But it happens to us virtually every day.

Today alone I've had that same or a variation of the same conversation with:

1) Real estate agent
2) Teller at the bank
3) Girl at the convenience store
4) Woman in Lowes who was getting me a quote on blinds. She knows TJ's uncle.
5) Old lady and old man in Lowes who mistook my orange Auburn shirt for a Home Depot apron. Forgetting of course they were in Lowes.
6) Guy giving me a quote for installing a wooden fence.
7) Construction supervisor at the house
8) Guy at the door at Wal Mart
9) Boy bagging and loading my groceries at Publix

On the flip side I've gotten War Eagles from the guy at Verizon, the girl at the BBQ joint, a guy driving past as I went into Lowes and a few others. 

But If somebody tries to have that "I'm a Bama fan, but... " conversation with me again?  I'm going to be impolite.  Save your faux admiration for somebody else.  Don't want it.  I WANT us to scare you.  I hope you live every minute of every day in fear.   I want the sight of orange and blue to inflict psychological trauma on you. 

[CCTAU]

And we get that bullshit 365 days a year. Then if someone posts a War Eagle, the bamtards go apeshit. "I was trying to be civil, but dem aubies just won't shut up bout how good dey is. So I's gonna Lenten have it now." As if we don't hear your shit every day already.

Damn we need to win just so we can respond, "you lost. Shut up bitch!"

[The Prowler]

Do yourself a favor rws, wear a Auburn hat anywhere around Jasper, Cullman or just about anywhere else, for that matter. You'll understand. I had a guy yesterday say that he can't take my order because I have on a Auburn hat. He smiled...I didn't. Then he proceeded to take my order.

[Kaos]

Do yourself a favor rws, wear a Auburn hat anywhere around Jasper, Cullman or just about anywhere else, for that matter. You'll understand. I had a guy yesterday say that he can't take my order because I have on a Auburn hat. He smiled...I didn't. Then he proceeded to take my order.

I don't put up with that crap.  I have other places I can do business. 

AC guy showed up at my house with bama flags flying and magnets stuck all over his truck. I sent him on his way, cancelled the order and called another company.  I don't have to deal with that. 

The old man in Lowes tonight doesn't know how close he came to having to yank a box cutter out of his forehead.  Standing there explaining to me how Auburn always stocks up on all those junior college players and that's how they can try to catch up.  And how we had him just a little bit nervous, but Saban wasn't gonna let his players overlook Auburn. And how Auburn was always trying to get after teams, because they were such a scrappy bunch. 

Jesus Christ, it's like the last four or five years completely erased the 30 that came before it.  Didn't exist.  Bryant died on the same day Saban ascended down from the heavens.  There was no break. 

I'm standing there with a can of paint near my feet and a box cutter within reach.  Wondering which would do the most damage to the thin veiny skin of his skull.  Imagining the spray of blood and the croaking gaaahhhh sound he would make on first contact.  Seeing his knees buckle and hearing his wife shriek as the second blow crushed his temple. 

[dallaswareagle]

Its if they feel they have to come up to you and let you know that they are turd fans, I wear my AU stuff pretty much every weekend out here and really don't pay attention to what other folks are wearing, but you can see them cutting there way through the crowd heading right at me to announce their loyalty to Lord Saban and start mouthing " dem aubbies jsut dunt knoe ware we belong"

Its a better world to live in when they suck because they all disappear.   

[Godfather]

You forgot how they always have to say roll tide to you.  Yes I get that you are a bama fan you have on a jersey, sunglasses, baseball cap, shorts, socks, tennis shoes with roll tide on the shoe laces, and it is a fucking Tuesday.

I don't fucking want to hear your stupid expression. 


I have never said War Eagle to a bama fan.

[chityeah]

You forgot how they always have to say roll tide to you.  Yes I get that you are a bama fan you have on a jersey, sunglasses, baseball cap, shorts, socks, tennis shoes with roll tide on the shoe laces, and it is a fucking Tuesday.

I don't fucking want to hear your stupid expression. 


I have never said War Eagle to a bama fan.

This. I don't get that. They might as well just yell "fuck you" to me. I was in NOLA last weekend strolling the burbunz street wearing an AU hat. Looked up and a mouth breather in full gear staring me down as I was about to go by. His mouth opens and before he could speak I told him "don't even think about saying row tahd to me." Walk by in silence and him drolling on self.

[Tiger Wench]

Same thing with my fat fuck turd of a plant manager in El Dorado yesterday.  When my Ops manager introduced me to him, he immediately went back to his office JUST to get his tacky Wal Mart quality plastic turd cup and crow "Roh Tahd" to me.

The cup was empty.  He stood in the kitchen and made no attempt to fill it.  Was just holding in my face it like it was some fucking holy grail of turd cups.

When I finished my presentation (which consisted of "I know you don't like this new policy and you've made that very clear for the last two hours, but suck it up, buttercup, it's the law now.  Defy me at your peril, because I will rain the hellfire of the CEO down on your nasty redneck white trash head so hard it will knock that bad comb over into next week.), he stuck his hand out to shake mine, and opened his mouth to say the inevitable...

And I looked him square in the eye and just said "Don't. Say. It."

He shut his trap and left the room.

I can now expect a phone call if things don't go our way.  Fortunately for him, I will be in Aberdeen.

[Saniflush]

Same thing with my fat fuck turd of a plant manager in El Dorado yesterday.  When my Ops manager introduced me to him, he immediately went back to his office JUST to get his tacky Wal Mart quality plastic turd cup and crow "Roh Tahd" to me.

The cup was empty.  He stood in the kitchen and made no attempt to fill it.  Was just holding in my face it like it was some fucking holy grail of turd cups.

When I finished my presentation (which consisted of "I know you don't like this new policy and you've made that very clear for the last two hours, but suck it up, buttercup, it's the law now.  Defy me at your peril, because I will rain the hellfire of the CEO down on your nasty redneck white trash head so hard it will knock that bad comb over into next week.), he stuck his hand out to shake mine, and opened his mouth to say the inevitable...

And I looked him square in the eye and just said "Don't. Say. It."

He shut his trap and left the room.

I can now expect a phone call if things don't go our way.  Fortunately for him, I will be in Aberdeen.

Do ya think he knows how to operate a phone?

[WiregrassTiger]

It really doesn't bother me much to get the Row Tahds. I just give 'em the old, "Yeah, allright buddy, good to see ya! Good luck!", and move along. I spend most of my day doing that for other reasons anyway, so it's not that big of a deal.

[AU_Tiger_2000]

Ya'll should do what I do, just ignore people.  Sometimes when people try to talk to me I hand them a card that says I'm deaf and can I have $5.  I really get odd looks when I do that while I'm talking on my cell phone.

[Buzz Killington]

Do ya think he knows how to operate a phone?

He only has to tell Sarah to get him Aberdeen

[Pell City Tiger]

He only has to tell Sarah to get him Aberdeen

"Way'ull, whitch'in do ye want, Ab er Dean? I ain't got but wun tellie phone, an' I ain't got time fer this; I'm lissenin' to sabin's press conference."

[Tiger Wench]

He only has to tell Sarah to get him Aberdeen

Excellent hustle.

[Tiger Wench]

"Way'ull, whitch'in do ye want, Ab er Dean? I ain't got but wun tellie phone, an' I ain't got time fer this; I'm lissenin' to sabin's press conference."

More excellent hustle.  Y'all are just a tub of margarine, cuz you guys are on a roll today!!!

[The Prowler]

Funny, rws hasn't responded back.

You'd think at some point he'd realize that his team's fanbase are nothing but a bunch of braying retards, much like their strength and conditioning coach.

[bottomfeeder]

Surprisingly, here in lower bama, the turds have been uncharacteristically quiet. I think they may be a bit concerned.