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Post Your Guarantees

Saniflush

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #20 on: August 20, 2013, 10:58:30 AM »
Jake Holland is a finalist for the Neiko Thorpe award.

See now you aren't even being serious.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Snaggletiger

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #21 on: August 20, 2013, 11:17:14 AM »
Jay Jacobs does something stupid
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Godfather

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #22 on: August 20, 2013, 11:21:04 AM »
Snaggle wears stonewash jeans to a game.
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Gus is gone, hooray!
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #23 on: August 20, 2013, 11:21:44 AM »
Snaggle wears stonewash jeans to a game.

They're making a comeback
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Godfather

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #24 on: August 20, 2013, 11:21:56 AM »
Kadily Frazier is a starter at Safety by years end.
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Gus is gone, hooray!
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Godfather

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #25 on: August 20, 2013, 11:22:15 AM »
They're making a comeback
Probably true
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ssgaufan

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #26 on: August 20, 2013, 11:22:28 AM »
Jay Jacobs does something stupid

That's a given so you can't list it as one of your guarantees.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #27 on: August 20, 2013, 11:42:40 AM »
That's a given so you can't list it as one of your guarantees.

troof
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

dallaswareagle

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #28 on: August 20, 2013, 11:59:47 AM »
Shane will miss all of the turd games again this year.

Something will happen to updick and he'll blame someone from Auburn.
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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'

Saniflush

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #29 on: August 20, 2013, 12:01:24 PM »
Shane will miss all of the turd games again this year.

Not true. 
He'll get to see them from below.
Kind of like the opposite of having upper deck seats.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

djsimp

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #30 on: August 20, 2013, 01:17:28 PM »
Auburn wins 9 games

Auburn beats bama

Auburn is represented in the SEC "Player of Week" 8 times. Includes offense, defense and special teams

Auburn plays in the Capitol One bowl....and wins





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Godfather

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #31 on: August 20, 2013, 01:24:48 PM »
Several in this forum will die from their crack overdoses.
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Gus is gone, hooray!
                       -Auburn Fans


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djsimp

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #32 on: August 20, 2013, 01:31:18 PM »
Several in this forum will die from their crack overdoses.

You wanna hit?
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #33 on: August 20, 2013, 01:54:22 PM »
Several in this forum will die from their crack overdoses.

Ever since I went to that Redstone Rehab, crack cocaine is no longer a part of my life.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Snaggletiger

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #34 on: August 20, 2013, 01:54:36 PM »
Now, I will take a drink
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

AWK

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #35 on: August 20, 2013, 02:05:12 PM »
You guys hit the bottle early this week.
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Redskins cornerback DeAngelo Hall said, "Guys don't mind hitting Michael Vick in the open field, but when you see Cam, you have to think about how you're going to tackle him. He's like a big tight end coming at you."

Buzz Killington

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #36 on: August 20, 2013, 02:28:22 PM »
Several in this forum will die from their crack overdoses.

Good evening Sir, my name is Steve. I come from a rough area. I used to be addicted to crack but now I am off it and trying to stay clean. That is why I am selling magazine subscriptions.
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

ssgaufan

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #37 on: August 20, 2013, 02:58:56 PM »
Geez Buzz, that avatar is  :tits:!  Especially for a guy that hasn't been laid in several months.

My guarantees,

Auburn makes a lower tier bowl game, and wins.

Auburn's defense will still be shitty.

alabama loses two regular season games but still almost backs into the MNC game.

JFF doesn't end up in the top five of Heisman finalists.

UK will be better than UT.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #38 on: August 20, 2013, 03:45:57 PM »
Have no idea if he'll be in the Heisminz race again, but barring injury, he'll put up some gawdy numbers.  Simply because he's playing in Kevin Sumlin's system.  I believe any half way decent QB can throw for 20+ touchdowns and 3,000 yards under Sumlin...and Malzahn for that matter.  JFF has the added feature of almost being Nick Marshall like in his running ability.

I think what will hurt him, assuming he stays healthy and plays a full season, is the bad pub he's getting and the cloud of the autograph thingy hanging over his head.  There will be so many that simply won't vote for him because of it.  He'd have to be like Cam and have such a great season that he forces you to vote him in.  I don't think it will happen and ESPN will pick their favorites and pimp them all the way to NY.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

dallaswareagle

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Re: Post Your Guarantees
« Reply #39 on: August 20, 2013, 04:22:55 PM »
Have no idea if he'll be in the Heisminz race again, but barring injury, he'll put up some gawdy numbers.  Simply because he's playing in Kevin Sumlin's system.  I believe any half way decent QB can throw for 20+ touchdowns and 3,000 yards under Sumlin...and Malzahn for that matter.  JFF has the added feature of almost being Nick Marshall like in his running ability.

I think what will hurt him, assuming he stays healthy and plays a full season, is the bad pub he's getting and the cloud of the autograph thingy hanging over his head.  There will be so many that simply won't vote for him because of it.  He'd have to be like Cam and have such a great season that he forces you to vote him in.  I don't think it will happen and ESPN will pick their favorites and pimp them all the way to NY.

Look to the Ohio State.
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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'