No Fun League

[Townhallsavoy]

I'm surprised the owners would be okay with this.

http://deadspin.com/the-nfl-will-crack-down-on-touchdown-celebrations-agai-1039711146

I know we were all thinking it: football is just a little too fun. But worry not, the NFL is sensitive to your concerns, and plans to squeeze what little joy was left out of touchdown celebrations.

As first noted by Pro Football Talk, reports out of multiple camps have officials warning players that they intend to more strictly enforce the unsportsmanlike conduct penalties already on the books. That includes:

sack dances; home run swing; incredible hulk; spiking the ball; spinning the ball; throwing or shoving the ball; pointing; pointing the ball; verbal taunting; military salute; standing over an opponent (prolonged and with provocation); or dancing.

Oh, I'm sorry, you actually like those things and think they make the game better? So does Carolina's Steve Smith, who for a decade has been punctuating touchdowns by spinning the football. Spinning, it seems, will come in for particular scrutiny.

Smith said he plans to keep on doing his signature ball spin, despite an emphasis by officials to crack down on taunting this year.

“We're working it out,” said Smith, adding he might have to alter his spin.

Officials have been told to penalize players who spin the ball at or in the vicinity of opponents.
(Update: An NFL spokesperson writes to let us know that the crackdown on spinning won't apply to touchdown celebrations, but only as the team is moving the ball down the field.)

It's the slow, vicious creep of conformity. Can you believe it was seven whole years ago that the NFL first banned props and group celebrations, as well as the "throat slash; machine-gun salute; sexually-suggestive gestures; prolonged gyrations; or stomping on a team logo?" Soon, players will be forced to sign a notarized document confirming that they did indeed score a touchdown and fax it back to the league office before they're allowed to return to the sideline.

Ah well. Enjoy the best TD celebration ever. You won't see its like again.

[Snaggletiger]

That damn discount double check that Rodgers does should be flagged every time.

[Townhallsavoy]

That damn discount double check that Rodgers does should be flagged every time.

Won't be. 

Lambeau Leap has already been cleared for celebration.

I think these will mainly be flagged if they perform these celebrations towards another player.  I hope so at least.  The Justin Tuck yoga bow is one that shouldn't receive a penalty.

[Snaggletiger]

Okay, but what if after a touchdown, the player looks at another and says,  "I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries."

[WiregrassTiger]

Okay, but what if after a touchdown, the player looks at another and says,  "I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries."

Is there someone else up there that we could talk to?

[Townhallsavoy]

Okay, but what if after a touchdown, the player looks at another and says,  "I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries."

Flag!  Fifteen yard penalty!  $10,000 fine! 

[Kaos]

The Superman reveal was not on the banned list.  They knew better.

[Buzz Killington]

Okay, but what if after a touchdown, the player looks at another and says,  "I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries."

I told him we've already got one!

[The Six]

The Superman reveal was not on the banned list.  They knew better.

Just shows that Bammers only work for the NCAA...not the NFL.

Too many rules for this game. Shark jump forthcoming.

[GH2001]

Jack Lambert asks, "what have they done to my 'man's game' ?"