So I decided to get closer to the current century. Was having problems with my front door lock and decided it would be good to replace it with one of those wireless locks so I can open it for the exterminator even if I'm not home, set it to lock automatically when I'm not here, and whatnot. And I'm thinking it might be cool to have stuff like lights I can just tell to turn on without getting up.
In order to run the lock, I have to have SmartThings hub. Well, whatever. So I get that. It was on sale.
Install the hub. All of my wireless stuff is upstairs. No wiring downstairs.
Install the door lock at the front door. Can't get it to connect to the Hub.
Read back through the directions. Have to take the door apart, take the lock upstairs and pair it to the hub from "within five feet." Call tech support to make sure that's the answer. Get "Mirna" She says yes, I have to take it upstairs to pair it that close to the hub, but once it's paired I should be good to go.
Do that and reinstall the door lock on the door. Nope. Nothing. Tech support again. This time I get Jiminibad from Noworkistan. Delete the pairing, take the door apart, take the thing back upstairs, pair it again. Go through the reset process. Reinstall lock in the door.
All the codes I programmed in to lock the door are now invalid and I have to reset those. In doing so Jiminibad accidentally has me un-pair the Hub.
Take it apart again. Back upstairs. Pair again. Reinstall it. Reprogram the access codes. Still shows I'm paired. The SmartThings app works. Once.
Hasn't worked since. Oh, I've tried.
Call SmartThings support. Get "Celeste" She runs through a bunch of questions I've already answered. Asks me to measure the distance between the hub and the door. Fuck, I don't know. It's across the dining room, up the stairs, past the bedroom and into my office. The fuck I know how far that is.
So she says I need to move the hub to within no more than 12 feet from the door lock. SmartThings cannot guarantee a quality connection if there is more than 12 feet separating the two. Remember the piece of shit hub has to be directly plugged into the router.
That's fucking asinine. I'm not going to rewire my entire motherfucking house and move my fucking router downstairs and into the fucking dining room so it's close enough to the door. Fuck Celeste.
Then she says I can probably invest in a series of ($40) repeaters to boost my coverage and possibly have a better signal. I just need to do trial and error to position them so they provide the best direct coverage.
Fuck this. I'm going back to locking and unlocking my door like a caveman. I'll turn my own lights off and on.
Technology. Worthless.
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