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Fun Facts About Speaker Pelosi

Tarheel

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Fun Facts About Speaker Pelosi
« on: May 19, 2009, 01:42:28 PM »
I read this on IMAO and thought it was mildly amusing:

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Know Thy Enemy: Nancy Pelosi
Posted by Frank J. on May 19, 2009 at 1:07 pm

With Nancy Pelosi in the news so much lately, I though people might want to know more about her. Thus, I sent my crack research staff to find out all they could about her. Get ready to update Wikipedia!

FUN FACTS ABOUT NANCY PELOSI

* Nancy Pelosi had to exploit her connections in government to get approval to build her gingerbread house.

* Despite her appearance and that she’s from San Francisco, reportedly Pelosi is not an old tranny.

* If the pressure used to stretch back Pelosi’s face were ever released, it could take out a city block.

* Every time Pelosi lies, her face stretches tighter.

* Pelosi’s favorite food is the tears of crying children.

* Humans have a natural, untaught fear of snakes, spiders, and Pelosi’s smiling visage.

* Nancy Pelosi was the inspiration for the Cloverfield monster.

* As an official in San Francisco, Pelosi personally took away Dirty Harry’s badge on four separate occasions.

* Common Pelosi rebuttal in political debates: “I’ll suck out your life juices!”

* Pelosi’s tramp stamp is the Chinese symbol for “dessicated.”

* If Pelosi looks at you and bares her teeth (”smiles”), that means she is about to attack. Shield face and groin.

* Pelosi’s iPod is filled with nothing but the sounds kittens make when they’re strangled.

* Contrary to popular rumors, Pelosi will not melt when she comes in contact with water. But she will multiply.

* Instead of Nana or Grammy, Pelosi’s nickname from her grandchildren is “Proof there is no God.”

* In a fight between Nancy Pelosi and Aquaman, Pelosi would claim Aquaman never told her that he planned to submerge his enemies in water.

* Pelosi has hired the Jim Henson Creature Shop to give her a wider range of facial expressions.

* Pelosi doesn’t shake hands and kiss babies because she tends to frighten people when she exclaims, “Mmm… fresh baby!”

* Currently, in San Francisco the phrase “The San Francisco Treat” refers to a bag over Pelosi’s head.

Link:
http://www.imao.us/index.php/2009/05/know-thy-enemy-nancy-pelosi/
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AUTiger1

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Re: Fun Facts About Speaker Pelosi
« Reply #1 on: May 19, 2009, 01:48:00 PM »
Good stuff! 

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* If the pressure used to stretch back Pelosi’s face were ever released, it could take out a city block.

Has to be my favorite.
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Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

There are gonna be days when you lay your guts on the line and you come away empty handed, there ain't a damn thing you can do about it but go back out there and lay em on the line again...and again, and again! -- Coach Pat Dye

It isn't that liberals are ignorant. It's just they know so much that isn't so. --Ronald Reagan

Pell City Tiger

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Re: Fun Facts About Speaker Pelosi
« Reply #2 on: May 19, 2009, 08:03:32 PM »
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As an official in San Francisco, Pelosi personally took away Dirty Harry’s badge on four separate occasions
Bitch!
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"I stood up, unzipped my pants, lowered my shorts and placed my bare ass on the window. That's the last thing I wanted those people to see of me."