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I Knew AU Was Cheating

Snaggletiger

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I Knew AU Was Cheating
« on: April 12, 2013, 10:07:46 AM »
SI.kum copypasta


Major NCAA violations have reportedly taken place across several sports programs, including football, at Iowa State University. According to the Ames Tribune, an investigation by Iowa State found several violations that would “constitute a major infractions case.” Six current and former members of the Iowa State football and basketball coaching staffs were tabbed in the report, including current ISU football assistant coaches Shane Burnham and Bill Bleil and former assistants Bobby Elliott and Luke Wells. Elliott is now an assistant at Notre Dame, while Wells is an assistant at Utah State.

According to document obtained by the Tribune, the investigation found three years worth of impermissible phone calls and texts to recruits. The majority of the violations surround phone calls which the coaching staff failed to properly record, and the report submitted to the NCAA largely blames the Iowa State athletic administration for failing to educate coaches on proper compliance procedures, as many coaches admitted they were unaware of the necessity of recording phone calls. In all, 33 coaches from all 18 ISU varsity sports were found to be “considered at-risk for 1,405 impermissible calls,” as well as 165 impermissible text messages, according to the report.

Iowa State first released information about NCAA violations last week. “We’ve been committed to being as transparent as possible throughout this entire process, which has been challenging given it has been an ongoing investigation and we did not receive the final report until this week,” ISU athletic director Jamie Pollard said in a statement. ISU has asked for a two-year probation period from the NCAA as punishment, but all coaches named in the report are at risk of receiving a show-cause penalty.


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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Buzz Killington

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #1 on: April 12, 2013, 10:12:37 AM »
They's dirty PAAAAAAAWWWWWL!
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

wesfau2

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #2 on: April 12, 2013, 10:20:29 AM »
It's Chizik's fault.
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And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Saniflush

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #3 on: April 12, 2013, 10:21:20 AM »
Here come the cattle
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Jumbo

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #4 on: April 12, 2013, 10:21:30 AM »
All roads point back to Auburn.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #5 on: April 12, 2013, 10:29:43 AM »
Srrsly, this could affect AU because the radio report I heard this morning said that Scott Fountain was reported to have made...I think they said....24 impermissible calls or texts. 

Kind of a catch 22 in that the NCAA is trying to loosen the restrictions and allow almost unlimited communication, hence the hiring by AU and Bama of all these extra coaches. But now they have to look at enforcing rules on the same activity they're trying to allow.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

ssgaufan

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #6 on: April 12, 2013, 10:31:37 AM »
They's dirty PAAAAAAAWWWWWL!

Buzz, outstanding avatar!  I keep watching and hoping that those big ol thangs pop on out.   :tits:
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RWS

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #7 on: April 12, 2013, 03:22:54 PM »
Who the fuck cares about some phone calls and text messages?
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Snaggletiger

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #8 on: April 12, 2013, 04:21:49 PM »
Hello, is this the NCAA?

Yes it is.

Great. I've got 100% documented proof that Iowa State has been making phone calls and text messages to recruits in direct violation of NCAA by-laws. 

Excuse me,  you did say Iowa State?

That's right

Soooo...what's your question?

I've got tapes and records proving they've committed serious NCAA violations.

Sir, I'm not following you.

What they've done is....I've got taped conversations....phone records.  They're cheating.

Sir, this is the NCAA Compliance Department.  Could you tell me why..

I KNOW it's the compliance department.  That's who I called.  Don't you want these documents?

For what?

BECAUSE IOWA STATE IS CHEATING!!!

Sir, please lower your voice.

I'M NOT....wait...I'm sorry.  I apologize.  Look, Paul Rhoades, who used to be at Auburn...

Sir wait.  DID YOU SAY AUBURN????

Mam, please lower your voice.   

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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Buzz Killington

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #9 on: April 12, 2013, 04:22:57 PM »
Strong hussel
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

WiregrassTiger

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #10 on: April 12, 2013, 07:33:43 PM »
Strong hussel
It was. He likely had help.
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djsimp

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #11 on: April 12, 2013, 07:42:32 PM »
It was. He likely had help.

I'm starting to think you guys work in the same office.
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Buzz Killington

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #12 on: April 12, 2013, 10:49:09 PM »
I'm starting to think you guys work in the same office.

Is he Dewey or Howe?
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

The Prowler

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #13 on: April 12, 2013, 10:58:19 PM »
Wait a second...Danny Sheridan stated on Bo Mattingly's radio show, that the NCAA is all tied up with the Miami scandal, so much so, they can't turn their attention anywhere else...including Auburn (he has to mention Auburn whenever talking about NCAA scandals, must be in his REC contract). Eventhough the  NCAA outed him as not having any inside source within their organization, during the Cam witch hunt.
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"Patriotism and popularity are the beaten paths for power and tyranny." Good, no worries about tyranny w/ Trump

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"The HUNH does cause significant Health and Safety issues, Health issues for the opposing fans and Safety issues for the opposing coaches." - AU AD Jay Jacobs

WiregrassTiger

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #14 on: April 13, 2013, 12:20:57 AM »
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Godfather

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #15 on: April 15, 2013, 10:02:16 AM »
I'm Screwem.
That would make him Oveure
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Buzz Killington

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #16 on: April 15, 2013, 10:14:41 AM »
That would make him Oveure
Oveure, this is Under.
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Snaggletiger

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #17 on: April 15, 2013, 10:16:07 AM »
Victor, what's our vector?
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

The Prowler

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Re: I Knew AU Was Cheating
« Reply #18 on: April 17, 2013, 06:08:49 AM »
Hello, is this the NCAA?

Yes it is.

Great. I've got 100% documented proof that Iowa State & Oregon have been making phone calls and text messages to recruits and paying a guy a lot of money to get players to sign with them in direct violations of NCAA by-laws. 

Excuse me,  you did say Iowa State & Oregon?

That's right

Soooo...what's your question?

I've got tapes and records proving they've committed serious NCAA violations.

Sir, I'm not following you.

What they've done is....I've got taped conversations....phone records.  They're cheating.

Sir, this is the NCAA Compliance Department.  Could you tell me why..

I KNOW it's the compliance department.  That's who I called.  Don't you want these documents?

For what?

BECAUSE IOWA STATE AND OREGON ARE CHEATING!!!

Sir, please lower your voice.

I'M NOT....wait...I'm sorry.  I apologize.  Look, Paul Rhoades, who used to be at Auburn & Lache Seastrunk was recruited by Auburn...

Sir wait.  DID YOU SAY AUBURN????

Mam, please lower your voice.

Fixed.
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"Patriotism and popularity are the beaten paths for power and tyranny." Good, no worries about tyranny w/ Trump

"Alabama's Special Teams unit is made up of Special Ed students." - Daniel Tosh

"The HUNH does cause significant Health and Safety issues, Health issues for the opposing fans and Safety issues for the opposing coaches." - AU AD Jay Jacobs