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The Library => Haley Center Basement => Topic started by: Ogre on January 29, 2009, 06:40:59 PM

Title: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Ogre on January 29, 2009, 06:40:59 PM
The setting:

I'm here in Denver, sitting in my hotel room finishing up some work and enjoying a Fat Tire or 6.  I look out my window, and to the left about a half of a block there is Shotgun Willie's - your typical dive-type titty flop.  The chicks are hot as hell.  I've become somewhat of a regular there.

I look to my right, and a half of a block away there is The Penthouse - obviously one of the magazine's titty flops.  For some reason I've never ventured over there.  From my previous experiences with Penthouse flops, they are usually pretentious and try to maintain an atmosphere that I like to call faux-class.  I'm probably going to head out to one or the other (because they are both within walking distance and I don't want to drink and drive - .04 is a DUI in Denver).

What would you do in my shoes?  Keep in mind that cover at Shotgun Willie's is $10, and beers are usually $8.  I've read that the cover at The Penthouse is $3 before 7:00 pm, and $7 afterwards.  No clue what beer prices are there, but I imagine they are comparable to SGW's. 

Any advice is appreciated.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Tarheel on January 29, 2009, 06:48:07 PM
I'm guessing that teh women at SGW are much more appreciative of their customers than the pretentious bishes at The Penthouse. 

SGWs.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AUTailgatingRules on January 29, 2009, 06:50:01 PM
Who has the cheapest "back room" dances?
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Ogre on January 29, 2009, 06:50:33 PM
Who has the cheapest "back room" dances?

SGW's is your standard $20/song.  I assume it's the same at the other place.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AUTailgatingRules on January 29, 2009, 06:51:22 PM
SGW's is your standard $20/song.  I assume it's the same at the other place.

I'm sorry, I meant "Back Room" benefits
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Ogre on January 29, 2009, 06:52:03 PM
I'm sorry, I meant "Back Room" benefits

It depends on the dancer.  Some are more whorish than others, if you can believe that.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AUTailgatingRules on January 29, 2009, 06:53:39 PM
It depends on the dancer.  Some are more whorish than others, if you can believe that.

I say go with the whore you know
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Tarheel on January 29, 2009, 06:55:00 PM
It depends on the dancer.  Some are more whorish than others, if you can believe that.

Like I said:

SGWs.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: chinook on January 29, 2009, 07:05:41 PM
shotgun willies. 

i need continuation to the previously written story...

 
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AUTiger1 on January 29, 2009, 07:14:43 PM
I say go with the whore you know

So, are you saying that a little strange is a bad thing?
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AUTailgatingRules on January 29, 2009, 07:26:45 PM
So, are you saying that a little strange is a bad thing?

Not a bad thing, just more work
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: wesfau2 on January 29, 2009, 07:31:23 PM
I agree that SGW should be your destination.

In my experience, clubs supporting a "brand" (ie- Hustler Club) are all talk. They live on the name alone.

At SGW you'll see your dollar appreciated.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AUTiger1 on January 29, 2009, 07:32:33 PM
Not a bad thing, just more work

Who the hell wants to work?  SGW's it is   :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Ogre on January 29, 2009, 07:39:19 PM
SGW's it is.  I'll try to remember to give an update later this evening.

Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AUTailgatingRules on January 29, 2009, 07:43:14 PM
SGW's it is.  I'll try to remember to give an update later this evening.



We want pictures
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Ogre on January 29, 2009, 07:45:53 PM
We want pictures

I shall do my best.

One thing I noticed from my last visit - their receipts say "Bavaria Inn" at the top.  I know this is standard with most titty bars, but I am always amused at what they come up with.  For example, The Cheetah in Atlanta shows up as the "Alluvia Restaurant."  This helps when filling out the expense report.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Tarheel on January 29, 2009, 10:39:45 PM
I shall do my best.

One thing I noticed from my last visit - their receipts say "Bavaria Inn" at the top.  I know this is standard with most titty bars, but I am always amused at what they come up with.  For example, The Cheetah in Atlanta shows up as the "Alluvia Restaurant."  This helps when filling out the expense report.


"Well...We're waiting."
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AUTiger1 on January 29, 2009, 10:45:01 PM

"Well...We're waiting."

It's still way too early.  If he is back already I am extremely disappointed.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Tarheel on January 29, 2009, 10:52:38 PM
It's still way too early.  If he is back already I am extremely disappointed.

I expect a live play-by-play, dammit!
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Greaseyweasel on January 29, 2009, 11:23:01 PM
I expect a live play-by-play, dammit!
...with pictures!
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Tarheel on January 29, 2009, 11:43:11 PM
...with pictures!

EXACTLY!

 :tits:
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AUTiger1 on January 29, 2009, 11:52:54 PM
EXACTLY!

 :tits:

As Rodney Carrington would say "show those puppies to me".  Pics pls!
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Jumbo on January 30, 2009, 12:38:16 AM
He got into a fight and Lost his phone.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Ogre on January 30, 2009, 01:02:23 AM
He got into a fight and Lost his phone.

This is pretty damn close to what happened. 

There I was, whipping out my iPhone to take some bodacious pictures for you fucks, and the manager spotted me.  He told me that no pictures were allowed inside the club.  I've had a few rounds of scotch and a few brews right now.  I told him that I just dropped $200 on one of his employees, and if I want to take pictures I feel like I have earned that right.  For some reason, $200 and a bar tab does not afford you the right to take pictures at Shotgun Willie's.  Here's the only one that I have (it's not worth a shit):

(http://mail.google.com/mail/?attid=0.1&disp=emb&view=att&th=11f261569745acea)

It's worth noting that the iPhone has no zoom on its camera.  The bitch I was trying to take a picture of was unbelievably hot.  Hell, 80% of them were hot. 

Long story short, after a good 'discussion' with management, I decided to leave.  The bitch I dropped all that money on was Swedish, and smoking fucking hot.  I wish I had a picture of those titties.  I wreak of stale cigarettes and Wild Orchid perfume.  I'm not as drunk as I want to be.  I have to work in the morning.  I'm pretty pissed off and I'm seriously considering walking over to the Penthouse.  If I do, I know I'll drop another wad on some other slut, and I am unfortunately too sober to justify it right now.  Damn this tolerance I've built up. 

Fuck each and every one of you.  I'm staying in Denver tomorrow night, and I should be off of work by 3:00 pm at the latest.  My Swedish whore literally begged me to come back tomorrow night - to which I told her "I bet you do, so I can drop another wad of cash in your lap."  My old whore from last time no longer works there, so I'm going to give the Penthouse a whirl tomorrow night.  I'm heading to Beaver Creek on Saturday for a few day's of skiing with the old ball-and-chain, so tomorrow is my last night of bachelor fun.  I plan on making the most of it. 

Yes, I am well aware that I am a piece of shit.  I am a worthless human being.  I fucking love every minute of it.  Suck my dick.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Tarheel on January 30, 2009, 01:12:52 AM
This is pretty damn close to what happened. 
...

The bitch I was trying to take a picture of was unbelievably hot.

...
The bitch I dropped all that money on was Swedish, and smoking fucking hot.  I wish I had a picture of those titties.
...

Dammit!  I wish you had a picture of those tits too!

Edit:
Thanks for trying anyway...never let it be said I don't recognize effort.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AUTiger1 on January 30, 2009, 01:21:01 AM
Damn management and their rules.  Damn good continuation from the first post.  Some titty pics would have been nice, but hell at least you tried and even went as far as trying to reason with them as to why you should have been afforded the right to take some.  +10   :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Ogre on January 30, 2009, 01:25:35 AM
Somewhere in between my 5th and 7th consecutive lap dance from the Swede, she looked in the mirror behind me and freaked out.  I asked her what was wrong, and she told me she thought she saw a cop.  I asked her what the big deal was, and she told me that if she didn't have both of her feet on the box in front of me (which she never did, btw) that we would both be arrested.  And I thought Alabama had some backward-assed laws!

About 30 minutes later, 2 cops walked in and went directly to the area where I recieved my lap dances.  I do have something to be thankful for in that they didn't walk in earlier.  I would be up shit creek if they saw that whore all over my shit the way she was. 
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Tarheel on January 30, 2009, 01:29:38 AM
Lucky; it would have been awkward having your better half bail your ass out under the circumstances of that kind of charge.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Ogre on January 30, 2009, 01:32:58 AM
Lucky; it would have been awkward having your better half bail your ass out under the circumstances of that kind of charge.

I would have footed the bill for a bail bondsman like I had to do back in my college years (thanks Thrilla, you piece of shit).   
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Tarheel on January 30, 2009, 01:35:35 AM
I would have footed the bill for a bail bondsman like I had to do back in my college years (thanks Thrilla, you piece of shit).   

Sounds like there's a story there.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AUTiger1 on January 30, 2009, 01:40:38 AM
Lucky; it would have been awkward having your better half bail your ass out under the circumstances of that kind of charge.

That would have sucked.  If I were in that circumstance, I would not have got bailed out and it would have cost me a fortune in a house, car and lawyer fees.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Saniflush on January 30, 2009, 07:36:00 AM
I would have footed the bill for a bail bondsman like I had to do back in my college years (thanks Thrilla, you piece of shit).   

I would've got your back.  I'm sure Western Union works out there. 

I find it hard to believe that they could arrest you.  Her maybe.  I would have to call shenanigans on that shit.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Ogre on January 30, 2009, 08:16:40 AM
I would got your back.  I'm sure Western Union works out there. 

I find it hard to believe that they could arrest you.  Her maybe.  I would have to call shenanigans on that shit.

Yeah, now that I'm sober, I'm thinking that she didn't know what she was talking about.  After all, she is a blonde stripper - usually not the sharpest tool in the shed.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: chinook on January 30, 2009, 09:09:48 AM
shotgun willie never fails for a good story.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: AuburnChopper 3.0 on January 30, 2009, 09:11:10 AM
The red x is all we get for a pic??  damn....   Sounds like you had fun as usual... Careful tonight, Penthouse might employ better bouncers.... just sayin..
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Ogre on January 30, 2009, 09:51:07 AM
The red x is all we get for a pic??  damn....   Sounds like you had fun as usual... Careful tonight, Penthouse might employ better bouncers.... just sayin..

That's weird, the picture shows up on my computer.  It's nothing special anyway.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Snaggletiger on January 30, 2009, 10:43:49 AM
That's weird, the picture shows up on my computer.  It's nothing special anyway.

Especially if you're in it. 
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Ogre on January 30, 2009, 10:54:06 AM
Especially if you're in it. 

Don't you have an ambulance to chase?
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Saniflush on January 30, 2009, 10:57:09 AM
Don't you have an ambulance to chase?

Today should be shelf leveling day.
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Snaggletiger on January 30, 2009, 11:07:42 AM
You guys slay me.  Slay me I tell ya'.  Actually, I've been working with this damn tire on the wheelbarrow.  Today is deposit day and if I don't get this thing fixed before 2:00...
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Tarheel on January 30, 2009, 03:48:33 PM
The red x is all we get for a pic??  damn....   Sounds like you had fun as usual... Careful tonight, Penthouse might employ better bouncers.... just sayin..

We still want pictures, Ogre.

 :tits:
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: chinook on January 30, 2009, 04:00:53 PM
We still want pictures, Ogre.

 :tits:

perhaps pictures of snow titties in beaver creek too..

also, if you haven't thought about it, take a 6-pack of your favorite beer up the slope.  bury it along the side of a run for a frosty p.m. beverage. 

Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Tarheel on January 30, 2009, 04:05:52 PM
perhaps pictures of snow titties in beaver creek too..

also, if you haven't thought about it, take a 6-pack of your favorite beer up the slope with you.  bury it to the side of a run for a frosty afternoon beverage. 



Those too!

 :gig:
Title: Re: Decisions, decisions
Post by: Thrilla on February 02, 2009, 02:31:00 PM
Oooh...the red x gets another victim.  Keep those on your phone as proof of your adventures.

I would have footed the bill for a bail bondsman like I had to do back in my college years (thanks Thrilla, you piece of shit).   

Just because I made it home without getting arrested (and unaware of your whereabouts) and passed out oblivious to all sounds (including cell phone rings) still does not make me responsible for your shenanigans that night.  You are the one who decided to water the grass, you know.