Tigers X - Number one Source to Talk Auburn Tigers Sports
Pat Dye Field => War Damn Eagle => Topic started by: Snaggletiger on January 06, 2020, 11:27:11 AM
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Why do we not have a countdown clock running for Tuna Togaparty's announcement? Is anyone live streaming this? My God, people. Coach Saban is going to be there and everything.
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On the edge of my seat, but I've got a guy on the other line about some whitewalls.
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ESPN is rushing to Tuscaloosa. Gameday has set up in front of Dumpy Chimes. Lee Corso will either put on an elephant head or a mock Fox Robot skull.
Perhaps the greatest college quarterback of all time and an improved version of Drew Brees (according to ESPN) is determining the fate of both the NFL and the NCAA.
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Rumor has it, the Dalai Lama will be sitting with them as well
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Tua bad he's leaving, I was hoping for one more year to break his other hip. Mr. Glass 2 will star him, I got a $10 that says he is a bust in the NFL.
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Tua bad he's leaving, I was hoping for one more year to break his other hip. Mr. Glass 2 will star him, I got a $10 that says he is a bust in the NFL.
He'll be a rich bust.
Can you imagine being the GM that drafts him? This is a horrible gamble.
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On the edge of my seat, but I've got a guy on the other line about some whitewalls.
My kinda team, Charlie. My kinda team.
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Tua bad he's leaving, I was hoping for one more year to break his other hip. Mr. Glass 2 will star him, I got a $10 that says he is a bust in the NFL.
Too bad he gonna bust in Miami.
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He'll be a rich bust.
Can you imagine being the GM that drafts him? This is a horrible gamble.
Which is why he would have been the biggest moron to ever go to bama (and that says A LOT!) if he had decided to come back
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Too bad he gonna bust in Miami.
You shut your whore mouth, we better not draft him. Flores is smarter than that...I hope. I hope.
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You shut your whore mouth, we better not draft him. Flores is smarter than that...I hope. I hope.
He's gonna make the '72 Dolphins cry as soon as he gets healthy.
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I don't understand the mentality of leaving to take a pay cut. I guess he does have principles after all.
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I don't understand the mentality of leaving to take a pay cut. I guess he does have principles after all.
Its OK. With little Tua still there, his folks get to keep their new jobs in Turdscaloser.
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Its OK. With little Tua still there, his folks get to keep their new jobs in Turdscaloser.
Thank God for Saban and the Red Elephant Club saving the Tongavolacocola family from the hell on earth they were living in.
(https://i0.wp.com/hawaiistateparks.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/relax_hawaii.jpg?w=846&ssl=1) (https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2Fhawaiistateparks.org%2F&psig=AOvVaw1BfWKiGOI02a3r7ghThl0Y&ust=1578425891048000&source=images&cd=vfe&ved=0CAIQjRxqFwoTCPD8wfDc7-YCFQAAAAAdAAAAABAD)
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Here's Mr. Turdabologna arriving in Alabaster shortly after his son Toofer signed with Alabama.
(https://media.giphy.com/media/bI8k8l4834htC/giphy.gif)
On a side note, did you notice that al.com listed the even more worthless younger brother as first team QB of the decade for the state?
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https://twitter.com/ByJustinLee/status/1214270830391316482?s=20
I don't know who the hell the Auburn fans were that Lee polled? Probably the AUGAG! AU Gus Apologists Group
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https://twitter.com/ByJustinLee/status/1214270830391316482?s=20
I don't know who the hell the Auburn fans were that Lee polled? Probably the AUGAG! AU Gus Apologists Group
Another one of those "I feel as if..." where the moron echoes some Bama talking point and thinks it applies.
Just because noone threw eggs at his house doesn't mean we didn't think he was an overrated, cheating turd.
I don't wish him tons of NFL success. I don't wish him anything. I'll probably forget him in a few weeks as he disappears into the NFL system for a year or two (much like the equally hyped and vastly overrated McTattoo bitch).
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https://twitter.com/ByJustinLee/status/1214270830391316482?s=20
I don't know who the hell the Auburn fans were that Lee polled? Probably the AUGAG! AU Gus Apologists Group
Who said we stopped?
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Here's Mr. Turdabologna arriving in Alabaster shortly after his son Toofer signed with Alabama.
(https://media.giphy.com/media/bI8k8l4834htC/giphy.gif)
On a side note, did you notice that al.com listed the even more worthless younger brother as first team QB of the decade for the state?
He couldn’t even win a state title on a loaded team. And his successor DID.
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Alls I know is that I can finally work this afternoon now that this load is off my mind.
Miami is one lucky team.
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Alls I know is that I can finally work this afternoon now that this load is off my mind.
Miami is one lucky team.
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/D14ehTUWoAAihyX.jpg) (https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fadamschefter%2Fstatus%2F1107355488881180677&psig=AOvVaw0mzjFgtwGDhWuQsF4UUYrK&ust=1578431919923000&source=images&cd=vfe&ved=0CAIQjRxqFwoTCJDPxqTz7-YCFQAAAAAdAAAAABAD)
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"What's wrong with this board?'
Now there's a psychologist's dream list of subjects...
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(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/D14ehTUWoAAihyX.jpg) (https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fadamschefter%2Fstatus%2F1107355488881180677&psig=AOvVaw0mzjFgtwGDhWuQsF4UUYrK&ust=1578431919923000&source=images&cd=vfe&ved=0CAIQjRxqFwoTCJDPxqTz7-YCFQAAAAAdAAAAABAD)
That picture is going to look so good over GFs mantel.
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(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/D14ehTUWoAAihyX.jpg) (https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fadamschefter%2Fstatus%2F1107355488881180677&psig=AOvVaw0mzjFgtwGDhWuQsF4UUYrK&ust=1578431919923000&source=images&cd=vfe&ved=0CAIQjRxqFwoTCJDPxqTz7-YCFQAAAAAdAAAAABAD)
(https://media.giphy.com/media/KvWUKOYR8phja/giphy.gif)
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I'm having trouble figuring out how to go on. Toodles Turdbalogna gave so much to the game. There's an emptiness there now that may never be filled.
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Tuna was the greatest player ever to suit up in the history of the SEC. And he is one of the finest human beings on the face of the earth.
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I remember when Tuer took his family to Sea World. They were watching Shamu when Tunic got splashed. So, Twinkle yells "I'm Twinkie Twotones and no one gets me wet!" So, he climbs in the tank, throws Shamu into the crowd, splashes him and says "how you like that?" and then damn if Tudball didn't step in there and finish the show.
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Did I ever tell you about the time Two'er showed up at my daughter’s wedding? You know my daughter, she’s a beautiful girl. Well, Tuna shows up and you know he’s a big fella. Well, he’s standing right between me and my daughter at the ceremony. He’s got no right to be there, but he’s drunk and he’s Trooper. Well, long story short, the priest accidentally marries me and Toomer. We spend the weekend in the Poconos — he loved me like I’ve never been loved before.
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Did you ever hear the story of how Tuger Toblerone was born?
He came out three months early. His mother's birth canal was swollen because Mr. Turdbelonger had been hammering her with his fist since she had been reluctant to perform sexual acts due to the size and activity of young Toobler in her belly. He made sure she understood her role. Young Tagglar was ready to be born and could not wait. He fought his way out, breaking both ankles and one hip in the process. He then gnawed the umbilical cord in two himself. The doctor and two nurses, all amazed by his beauty, fainted. He clambered down from the bed and performed CPR on all three at once, saving their lives. Once they were safe, he leaped back on the table and used his glowing aura to repair his mother's shredded vagina. He used the remains of the chewed up umbilical cord to perform an emergency transfusion, saving his mother's life in the process. His young bones knit themselves back into place in a matter of minutes. Weary from the effort on his first day of existence, young Tallywhoova stepped down from the table and picked up the football his father had left for him as a birth gift. As he examined the item he tripped over the doctor, who was sprawled on the floor trying to recover from fainting. Young Tellwhalovia's arm hit the hard tile floor and the ball bounced out of his hands. His father burst through the door enraged and rained blows down upon his head and back. You. Will. Not. Fumble. The. Fucking. Ball. the elder Tragalophilia bellowed. Thus, the legend was born.
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Well...That was awkward.
And went to hell fast...
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Did you ever hear the story of how Tuger Toblerone was born?
He came out three months early. His mother's birth canal was swollen because Mr. Turdbelonger had been hammering her with his fist since she had been reluctant to perform sexual acts due to the size and activity of young Toobler in her belly. He made sure she understood her role. Young Tagglar was ready to be born and could not wait. He fought his way out, breaking both ankles and one hip in the process. He then gnawed the umbilical cord in two himself. The doctor and two nurses, all amazed by his beauty, fainted. He clambered down from the bed and performed CPR on all three at once, saving their lives. Once they were safe, he leaped back on the table and used his glowing aura to repair his mother's shredded vagina. He used the remains of the chewed up umbilical cord to perform an emergency transfusion, saving his mother's life in the process. His young bones knit themselves back into place in a matter of minutes. Weary from the effort on his first day of existence, young Tallywhoova stepped down from the table and picked up the football his father had left for him as a birth gift. As he examined the item he tripped over the doctor, who was sprawled on the floor trying to recover from fainting. Young Tellwhalovia's arm hit the hard tile floor and the ball bounced out of his hands. His father burst through the door enraged and rained blows down upon his head and back. You. Will. Not. Fumble. The. Fucking. Ball. the elder Tragalophilia bellowed. Thus, the legend was born.
(https://media.giphy.com/media/iAYupOdWXQy5a4nVGk/giphy.gif) (https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2Fgiphy.com%2Fexplore%2Fperplexed&psig=AOvVaw1ZYeqTv3hYDfCks-dxvfJl&ust=1578504220526000&source=images&cd=vfe&ved=0CAIQjRxqFwoTCMDeyNaA8uYCFQAAAAAdAAAAABAD)
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Did you ever hear the story of how Tuger Toblerone was born?
He came out three months early. His mother's birth canal was swollen because Mr. Turdbelonger had been hammering her with his fist since she had been reluctant to perform sexual acts due to the size and activity of young Toobler in her belly. He made sure she understood her role. Young Tagglar was ready to be born and could not wait. He fought his way out, breaking both ankles and one hip in the process. He then gnawed the umbilical cord in two himself. The doctor and two nurses, all amazed by his beauty, fainted. He clambered down from the bed and performed CPR on all three at once, saving their lives. Once they were safe, he leaped back on the table and used his glowing aura to repair his mother's shredded vagina. He used the remains of the chewed up umbilical cord to perform an emergency transfusion, saving his mother's life in the process. His young bones knit themselves back into place in a matter of minutes. Weary from the effort on his first day of existence, young Tallywhoova stepped down from the table and picked up the football his father had left for him as a birth gift. As he examined the item he tripped over the doctor, who was sprawled on the floor trying to recover from fainting. Young Tellwhalovia's arm hit the hard tile floor and the ball bounced out of his hands. His father burst through the door enraged and rained blows down upon his head and back. You. Will. Not. Fumble. The. fudgeing. Ball. the elder Tragalophilia bellowed. Thus, the legend was born.
Please get some help.
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Well, that escalated quickly.
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Please get some help.
I don't need any. My father beat me repeatedly when I made a mistake. I'm now perfect.
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So glad ESPN released a photo of all the mail Teefus Tangamabeava got as he pondered his NFL decision.
For the record? I got more mail than that (mostly catalogs) every single day between Thanksgiving and Dec 21. I need ESPN to come take my photo.
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So far on local bammerham television we have had a one-on-one with Telly himself, Tuba's dad and Tinkle's mom. I only hope tonight's sportscast features a riveting interview with Talulah's mailman.
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So far on local bammerham television we have had a one-on-one with Telly himself, Tuba's dad and Tinkle's mom. I only hope tonight's sportscast features a riveting interview with Talulah's mailman.
Somebody had to deliver all those letters to him. I want to hear about it. I need to know.
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Somebody had to deliver all those letters to him. I want to hear about it. I need to know.
Just ask Rick.
(https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1204260030209507328/qhaSUOrk_400x400.jpg)
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Just ask Rick.
(https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1204260030209507328/qhaSUOrk_400x400.jpg)
He's too busy playing with saban's dinghy.
(http://friendsoftheprogram.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/boatfinebaumsaban.jpg)
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He's too busy playing with saban's dinghy.
(http://friendsoftheprogram.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/boatfinebaumsaban.jpg)
Well,, he has moved to Channel 13 now sooooo.
But just so its re-said, that is by far top 5 gayest picture of all time.
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Just ask Rick.
(https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1204260030209507328/qhaSUOrk_400x400.jpg)
Having seen him in person, that dude's head is the size of three Alaskas. I've never seen a bigger, more disproportional, more shockingly ginormous skull in my life. It makes little kids cry.
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Having seen him in person, that dude's head is the size of three Alaskas. I've never seen a bigger, more disproportional, more shockingly ginormous skull in my life. It makes little kids cry.
Look at the size of that boy's head. I’m not kidding. It's like an orange on a toothpick.
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Look at the size of that boy's head. I’m not kidding. It's like an orange on a toothpick.
Now he's gonna go cry himself to sleep on his yuuuge pillow.
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(https://www.homebrewtalk.com/forum/attachments/bighead-jpg.361153/) (https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=2ahUKEwi1mqON6fTmAhUP16wKHcpmDOUQjRx6BAgBEAQ&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.homebrewtalk.com%2Fforum%2Fthreads%2Fhuge-head-infection.586270%2F&psig=AOvVaw2NHlXdtdhfhWrWiAyVNXXF&ust=1578600918987728)
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(https://www.homebrewtalk.com/forum/attachments/bighead-jpg.361153/) (https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=2ahUKEwi1mqON6fTmAhUP16wKHcpmDOUQjRx6BAgBEAQ&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.homebrewtalk.com%2Fforum%2Fthreads%2Fhuge-head-infection.586270%2F&psig=AOvVaw2NHlXdtdhfhWrWiAyVNXXF&ust=1578600918987728)
I am Cornhollio...I need TP for my bunghole...hehehehhe
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I am Cornhollio...I need TP for my bunghole...hehehehhe
The purposeful cuts are a nice touch
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The purposeful cuts are a nice touch
Jim trying to get that alien out again.
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Have I bitched about our state media and the questions they asked of LSU and Clemson during CFP Media Days?
- What was it like to play against Tua?
- Where do you rank Tua among the all-time greats at the position?
- How did Tua change the landscape of college football?
- How did Tua change the way you recruit, coach, play?
- How did getting beaten 29-0 by Tua change the way you approached this season?
And so on...
Then today, one of their writers (the insipid fan-boy Michael Casagrande) waxed sadly about the lack of Bama fans in New Orleans and how it felt "weird" not to be surrounded by their unwashed assholes.