Tigers X - Number one Source to Talk Auburn Tigers Sports
The Library => Haley Center Basement => Topic started by: Tiger Wench on January 11, 2013, 12:08:54 AM
-
Repost off my FB wall for those of you not on the bookfaces: I am so frustrated I could scream. Maybe the girls are candidates for a job on the X, but otherwise... :getoff:
Right now I am interviewing candidates for a position in my department. For you job seekers out there, a few helpful tips. (And these are my actual experiences...)
First, gmail is a free service, so take five minutes and set up a professional-looking email address to include on your resume. Whassup, "XX-la-pimpsta@gmail".
Second, when cutting and pasting from online job descriptions to flesh out your resume, remember that three different font styles and sizes on one page can often be a dead giveaway to a prospective employer that your resume is A FAKE.
Third, never offer up in an interview that your mom has gotten you every job you have ever had. Especially if you are 26.
And finally, for the love of Bacchus... I am all about having a good time on your own time, but damn, people - MAKE THE PICTURES ON YOUR FACEBOOK PAGE PRIVATE. 'Cause, yeah, I Googled you.
Hey there, Little Miss Looks Great On Paper, who was a serious candidate until I saw your profile pic where you are braless in a wife beater and shotgunning a beer, and the latest pic you were tagged in is of you doing tequila shots off a guy's crotch. I'm sure the Ops guys are just trying to make you feel like part of the team with all the Happy Hour invites.
That also goes for you, Little Miss I Think I'll Post My Lingerie Pictures on the Internet. Yep, I found those too. So will the Ops guys, and oh, yeah, they are TOTALLY going to take you seriously.
And you too, Mr. Spring Break 2012 Party Boy. That ever present bottle of Jack in your hand and a different girl in a skimpy bikini in every picture tells me you are definitely the guy to negotiate a complex multi-year, multi-million dollar contract for us. Rock on, man. And I think I'll take a #1 with no cheese, no onions.
-
Hey there, Little Miss Looks Great On Paper, who was a serious candidate until I saw your profile pic where you are braless in a wife beater and shotgunning a beer, and the latest pic you were tagged in is of you doing tequila shots off a guy's crotch. I'm sure the Ops guys are just trying to make you feel like part of the team with all the Happy Hour invites.
That also goes for you, Little Miss I Think I'll Post My Lingerie Pictures on the Internet. Yep, I found those too. So will the Ops guys, and oh, yeah, they are TOTALLY going to take you seriously.
:pics:
-
:pics:
Am surprised you were the one to post this. Was expecting Uncle Sani or Snaggie.
-
Am surprised you were the one to post this. Was expecting Uncle Sani or Snaggie.
They're getting slow in their golden years.
-
Am surprised you were the one to post this. Was expecting Uncle Sani or Snaggie.
I think he meant of XX-la-pimpsta.
-
I think he meant of XX-la-pimpsta.
(http://www.tigersx.com/images/solid_gold.png)
-
I gotta find a job in teh Human Capital Field
-
I gotta find a job in teh Human Capital Field
Your stories are good you just don't get to view pictures of half naked womenz....at work anyways.
-
I think he meant of XX-la-pimpsta.
No, he wanted to see the pictures of the spring break party boy
-
I think he meant of XX-la-pimpsta.
I hope not. She is a Nubian goddess.
-
I hope not. She is a Nubian goddess.
Oh boy now you got Tarheel excited.
-
That ever present bottle of Jack in your hand and a different girl in a skimpy bikini in every picture tells me you are definitely the guy to negotiate a complex multi-year, multi-million dollar contract for us.
OK, I get the objection to the booze pics, but what the fuck is with the cattiness about his girls? That's some bullshit.
-
Your stories are good you just don't get to view pictures of half naked womenz....at work anyways.
Now that is a deal breaker.
I will also add don't show up to an interview with me with a ankle monitor on. That lets me know that other people have been interested in you.
-
OK, I get the objection to the booze pics, but what the fuck is with the cattiness about his girls? That's some bullshit.
Lets me know he's a multitasker with strong networking skills!
-
Now that is a deal breaker.
I will also add don't show up to an interview with me with a ankle monitor on. That lets me know that other people have been interested in you.
Call the P.O. and get the story.
-
OK, I get the objection to the booze pics, but what the fuck is with the cattiness about his girls? That's some bullshit.
I was going to say, if he is an ugly mother and the bikini clad women are hot, then he might be exactly the guy you want to negotiate multi-million dollar deals.
-
I was going to say, if he is an ugly mother and the bikini clad women are hot, then he might be exactly the guy you want to negotiate multi-million dollar deals.
Exactly. Dude is a closer.
-
I was going to say, if he is an ugly mother and the bikini clad women are hot, then he might be exactly the guy you want to negotiate multi-million dollar deals.
They aren't hot. Unless you think skanks are hot. And maybe some of you do. These are Texas skanks at Galveston or Corpus, not SEC co-eds in PCB or P'cola. Remember, everything is bigger in Texas, and our skanks are bigger skanks than your skanks.
I was thinking that it might be hard to make Monday morning meetings if you are having to go by the clinic to get a shot to stop the drip. Squirming around in your chair because the crabs are making your crotch itch also would make it difficult to focus on the nuances of the deal.
He's a no. He might has been worth a look if there had been washboard abs, but there weren't. And I'm not allowed to ask them to take their shirts off anyway, so...
-
They aren't hot. Unless you think skanks are hot. And maybe some of you do. These are Texas skanks at Galveston or Corpus, not SEC co-eds in PCB or P'cola. Remember, everything is bigger in Texas, and our skanks are bigger skanks than your skanks.
I was thinking that it might be hard to make Monday morning meetings if you are having to go by the clinic to get a shot to stop the drip. Squirming around in your chair because the crabs are making your crotch itch also would make it difficult to focus on the nuances of the deal.
He's a no. He might has been worth a look if there had been washboard abs, but there weren't. And I'm not allowed to ask them to take their shirts off anyway, so...
Damn Sexual Harassment laws...
-
Damn Sexual Harassment laws...
Word. I have my cougar credentials, and can't even use them.
-
They aren't hot. Unless you think skanks are hot. And maybe some of you do. These are Texas skanks at Galveston or Corpus, not SEC co-eds in PCB or P'cola. Remember, everything is bigger in Texas, and our skanks are bigger skanks than your skanks.
I was thinking that it might be hard to make Monday morning meetings if you are having to go by the clinic to get a shot to stop the drip. Squirming around in your chair because the crabs are making your crotch itch also would make it difficult to focus on the nuances of the deal.
He's a no. He might has been worth a look if there had been washboard abs, but there weren't. And I'm not allowed to ask them to take their shirts off anyway, so...
She not be lying. I avoid most Texas beaches.
(http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d32/MadMedicc3/fat-women-eating-on-beach.jpg)
-
They aren't hot. Unless you think skanks are hot. And maybe some of you do.
Really? You been posting with these guys how long? And you HAVE to ask that!
-
They aren't hot. Unless you think skanks are hot. And maybe some of you do. These are Texas skanks at Galveston or Corpus, not SEC co-eds in PCB or P'cola. Remember, everything is bigger in Texas, and our skanks are bigger skanks than your skanks.
I was thinking that it might be hard to make Monday morning meetings if you are having to go by the clinic to get a shot to stop the drip. Squirming around in your chair because the crabs are making your crotch itch also would make it difficult to focus on the nuances of the deal.
He's a no. He might has been worth a look if there had been washboard abs, but there weren't. And I'm not allowed to ask them to take their shirts off anyway, so...
Yeah, pretty much covers every swinging dick and little birdies on this board.
-
Word. I have my cougar credentials, and can't even use them.
Sure you can, just not at work. ;)
-
Remember, everything is bigger in Texas, and our skanks are bigger skanks than your skanks.
(http://i026.radikal.ru/1204/cc/9a98f0da9736.gif)
-
Man, I could have used that info last week before my promotion interview. I brought a chubby bikini clad Texas skank with me.
-
TLDR!! I'm a meat cutter for Publix....Bite me and my diabetes
be with you....
-
TLDR!! I'm a meat cutter for Publix....Bite me and my diabetes
be with you....
Is that $17.99 per pound "Earthwise" organic shit really any different than the $10.99 a pound stuff right next to it?
Come on, butcher man. Fess up! It's from the same cow, isn't it!
-
Is that $17.99 per pound "Earthwise" organic shit really any different than the $10.99 a pound stuff right next to it?
Come on, butcher man. Fess up! It's from the same cow, isn't it!
-
Is that $17.99 per pound "Earthwise" organic shit really any different than the $10.99 a pound stuff right next to it?
Come on, butcher man. Fess up! It's from the same cow, isn't it!
It's in a different box and is certified Angus but that's about the only thing different. Save your money for beer.
-
It's in a different box and is certified Angus but that's about the only thing different. Save your money for beer.
I KNEW IT!!!
Angus Young doesn't know any more about raising cattle than I do!!!
-
Angus is practically tasteless. I'm a Hereford man.
(http://grassfedgrassfinishedbeef.com/images/side3.jpg)
http://grassfedgrassfinishedbeef.com/cow-pooling.html
http://repo.lib.auburn.edu/repo/bitstream/handle/123456789/2366/1613BULL.pdf
-
Angus is practically tasteless. I'm a Hereford man.
(http://grassfedgrassfinishedbeef.com/images/side3.jpg)
http://grassfedgrassfinishedbeef.com/cow-pooling.html
http://repo.lib.auburn.edu/repo/bitstream/handle/123456789/2366/1613BULL.pdf
Is this kind of like how RWS is a goat man?
-
Is this kind of like how RWS is a goat man?
Not the same. He prefers his alive.
-
Is this kind of like how RWS is a goat man?
Not really. He prefers to stick his pecker in the chitlins rather than eat them.
-
Angus is practically tasteless. I'm a Hereford man.
(http://grassfedgrassfinishedbeef.com/images/side3.jpg)
http://grassfedgrassfinishedbeef.com/cow-pooling.html
http://repo.lib.auburn.edu/repo/bitstream/handle/123456789/2366/1613BULL.pdf
This^^
-
I hope not. She is a Nubian goddess.
Oh boy now you got Tarheel excited.
It's a weakness; I can't explain matters of the heart.