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I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...

Tiger Wench

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I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« on: June 21, 2010, 03:31:26 PM »
WATERVILLE, Wash. — An argument over butter in a macaroni and cheese recipe churned into violence between a brother and sister near East Wenatchee.

A 21-year-old man called police June 6 to say his 17-year-old sister had tried to cut his neck with the serrated edge of a spatula.

The police report says the sister was making macaroni and cheese when her brother asked if she was using butter. That led to an argument over the difference between butter and margarine. And, then butter battle escalated.

The Wenatchee World reports the girl was charged in Douglas County Superior Court with fourth-degree assault.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #1 on: June 21, 2010, 03:47:48 PM »
If the bitch was really trying to slip margarine in the Mac n Cheese instead of real butter, then she's the one that deserves to have her throat slit.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Buzz Killington

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #2 on: June 21, 2010, 03:55:09 PM »
PARKAY Bitch!!!
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

JR4AU

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #3 on: June 21, 2010, 03:58:16 PM »
If the bitch was really trying to slip margarine in the Mac n Cheese instead of real butter, then she's the one that deserves to have her throat slit.

I'm thinking a jury in Alabama would agree.
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AUsweetheart

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #4 on: June 21, 2010, 08:57:18 PM »
If the bitch was really trying to slip margarine in the Mac n Cheese instead of real butter, then she's the one that deserves to have her throat slit.

Fuck that.
I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who asks me to make the Mac n Cheese, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said "Thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a spatula and make it your goddamn self.
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A national championship is a wonderful thing, but if you're not enough without it, you'll never be enough with it.

Pell City Tiger

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #5 on: June 21, 2010, 10:40:16 PM »
Fuck that.
I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who asks me to make the Mac n Cheese, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said "Thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a spatula and make it your goddamn self.
A spatula? For macaroni and cheese? See, you're doing it all wrong. You're going to have a big mess on your hands.
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"I stood up, unzipped my pants, lowered my shorts and placed my bare ass on the window. That's the last thing I wanted those people to see of me."

Saniflush

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #6 on: June 22, 2010, 08:05:00 AM »
Fuck that.
I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who asks me to make the Mac n Cheese, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said "Thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a spatula and make it your goddamn self.

Did you order the mac and cheese?
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Snaggletiger

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #7 on: June 22, 2010, 09:23:17 AM »
Did you order the mac and cheese?

DID YOU ORDER THE MAC AND CHEESE???
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Saniflush

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #8 on: June 22, 2010, 10:07:50 AM »
DID YOU ORDER THE MAC AND CHEESE???

I did ordered the dish you sent me to order.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Godfather

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #9 on: June 22, 2010, 10:19:55 AM »
You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me to make that Mac n Cheese, you need me to make that Mac n Cheese. We use words like salt, boiling water, cheese. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending butter. You use them as a punchline.
« Last Edit: June 22, 2010, 10:22:00 AM by Godfather »
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JR4AU

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #10 on: June 22, 2010, 10:27:02 AM »
Fuck that.
I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who asks me to make the Mac n Cheese, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said "Thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a spatula and make it your goddamn self.

Oh, I forgot. You were sick the day they taught Mac n' Cheese at Mac n' Cheese school.
« Last Edit: June 22, 2010, 10:50:57 AM by JR4AU »
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Saniflush

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #11 on: June 22, 2010, 10:41:24 AM »
You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me to make that Mac n Cheese, you need me to make that Mac n Cheese. We use words like salt, boiling water, cheese. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending butter. You use them as a punchline.

I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who sits at the table of the very mac and cheese I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it. I'd prefer you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a spoon and stand at the oven. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

AUsweetheart

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #12 on: June 22, 2010, 11:06:33 AM »
I make my mac n cheese how I make my motherfucker mac n cheese. You want to investigate me, roll the dice and take your chances. I make mac n cheese three hundred yards away from four thousand Cubans who are trained to kill me. So don't think for one second that you can come down here, flash a badge and make me nervous.
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A national championship is a wonderful thing, but if you're not enough without it, you'll never be enough with it.

War Eagle!!!

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #13 on: June 22, 2010, 11:12:33 AM »
What the fuck are y'all talking about?

Another thread fucked up...
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Godfather

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #14 on: June 22, 2010, 11:26:48 AM »
What the fuck are y'all talking about?

Another thread fucked up...
You see War Eagle, I can deal with the margarine, and the butter, and the pasta. I don't want money, and I don't want medals. What I do want is for you to stand there in that faggoty white uniform and with your Harvard mouth extend me some fucking courtesy. You gotta ask me nicely.
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War Eagle!!!

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #15 on: June 22, 2010, 11:28:08 AM »
You see War Eagle, I can deal with the margarine, and the butter, and the pasta. I don't want money, and I don't want medals. What I do want is for you to stand there in that faggoty white uniform and with your Harvard mouth extend me some fucking courtesy. You gotta ask me nicely.

no clue...
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wesfau2

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #16 on: June 22, 2010, 11:33:14 AM »
no clue...

Jack, Tommy Cruise and some Code Red goodness.
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Godfather

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #17 on: June 22, 2010, 11:36:36 AM »
Quote from: War Eagle!!
y'all fuck up every thread
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Snaggletiger

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #18 on: June 22, 2010, 11:49:22 AM »
Colonel, what kind of fucked up kitchen you running here?  I'm going back to my restaurant.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

JR4AU

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Re: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...
« Reply #19 on: June 22, 2010, 11:53:01 AM »
This code of honor of yours makes me wanna beat the shit outta somebody!
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