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Poor kid, never stood a chance.....

The Prowler

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Poor kid, never stood a chance.....
« on: April 01, 2010, 06:33:45 PM »
Quote
Crimson Tide fans welcome their new son, Crimson Tide
By Matt Hinton

 Alabama fans show their unique and undying obsession with the Crimson Tide in many creative ways: Detailed reproductions of cherished moments, carefully worded stays of justice in trials, elaborate full-body tattoos, Bear Bryant-based reinterpretations of Shakespeare, offering infants to be autographed, etc. And, though they can't pass on their love via DNA (yet; the state's best gene therapists are working around the clock), they can brand their offspring with 'Bama-themed names, as the Witts of Hartselle, Ala., did with both of their boys, Tyde and Saban, in 2005 and 2007.

Not to be outdone in their devotion, J.L. and Jackie Redd of Tallassee, Ala., took the next step in January by introducing their son, Crimson Tide Redd, to the world:

The young couple made an agreement before their son's birth that J.L. could be in charge of naming the baby, wanting to use his last name, Redd, as inspiration.

"His family was extremely excited (about the name choice)," Jackie said.

"Her family couldn't understand why we'd name our child after a football team," J.L. said.

(Her family's choice? Deacon Blues.)

The new mother admits young Crimson "does already have a lot of Alabama stuff," but lest you get the idea he's destined to become the Todd Marinovich of lunatic fandom, the parents entertain no such intentions or fears. They're going to call the boy "Ty," and J.L. insists he isn't going to push his son to Tuscaloosa when Ty inevitably grows up to become a highly sought Division I prospect: "If (Auburn) offers him a scholarship, then I'll be happy for him to go there. We don't have plans to tell him who to be a fan of."

Well, obviously not. That's what the birth certificate is for. And the crimson wallpaper, and the houndstooth bedsheets, and the Jay Barker nightlight, and the "Rammer Jammer" jack-in-the-box with Mark Ingram as the clown ...

http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/football/blog/dr_saturday/post/Crimson-Tide-fans-welcome-their-new-son-Crimson?urn=ncaaf,231447

 :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:  You can't spell trailer trashed without (t..i..d..e)
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"Patriotism and popularity are the beaten paths for power and tyranny." Good, no worries about tyranny w/ Trump

"Alabama's Special Teams unit is made up of Special Ed students." - Daniel Tosh

"The HUNH does cause significant Health and Safety issues, Health issues for the opposing fans and Safety issues for the opposing coaches." - AU AD Jay Jacobs

djsimp

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Re: Poor kid, never stood a chance.....
« Reply #1 on: April 01, 2010, 09:10:54 PM »
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Tiger Wench

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Re: Poor kid, never stood a chance.....
« Reply #2 on: April 01, 2010, 10:19:08 PM »
I am sure CPS already has an entire file drawer devoted to these two geeneeusess.

Stupid fuckers.
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Tiger Wench

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Re: Poor kid, never stood a chance.....
« Reply #3 on: April 01, 2010, 10:28:20 PM »
You know, poor kid only has one grandpa - unfortunately, that is what happens when your momma fucks her brother.  You get one grandpa, a special needs kid and a family tree with no goldamn branches.

And yes, I have had a few margaritas this fine evening.  Why do you ask???
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djsimp

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Re: Poor kid, never stood a chance.....
« Reply #4 on: April 01, 2010, 11:01:22 PM »
You know, poor kid only has one grandpa - unfortunately, that is what happens when your momma phuks her brother.  You get one grandpa, a special needs kid and a family tree with no goldamn branches.

And yes, I have had a few margaritas this fine evening.  Why do you ask???

Noone ask, because even alcohol can not cloud the truth of this shit. This kind of shit happens when youphuk with then gene pool.
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wesfau2

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Re: Poor kid, never stood a chance.....
« Reply #5 on: April 02, 2010, 09:01:23 AM »
Naming your kid Crimson Redd is the ultra-white trash version of the redundancy that is William Williams or Robert Roberts.
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

chinook

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Re: Poor kid, never stood a chance.....
« Reply #6 on: April 02, 2010, 11:10:26 AM »
You know, poor kid only has one grandpa - unfortunately, that is what happens when your momma fucks her brother.  You get one grandpa, a special needs kid and a family tree with no goldamn branches.

And yes, I have had a few margaritas this fine evening.  Why do you ask???

tequila of choice?   

frozen or on the rocks?

salt rim or no salt?
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Tiger Wench

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Re: Poor kid, never stood a chance.....
« Reply #7 on: April 02, 2010, 01:17:02 PM »
tequila of choice?   

frozen or on the rocks?

salt rim or no salt?
We were not at a high class establlishment - it had a roll of paper towels on the table and a sandbox for the urchins - so the pickings were not that great quality wise. We were there for the boiled shrimp and crawfish - and they were outstanding. 

I do not know what tequila was in the frozen-no salt ones that I drank, but they applied it liberally.  The last one had a double shot on top of 1800, I think, which by their definition made it "top shelf".  Meh. 

I don't usually drink frozen ones but it was 80+ degrees here yesterday evening and we were sitting outside.  The frosted glass looked good.  And they did the job.  Nice little buzz.  Good flavor to the mix.

When I am in a position to be choosey, I will order Corzo or Patron Silver, chilled, for sipping.  Shots, well, there are a few I will choose from, since it has nothing to do with the taste at that moment and everything to do with how you will feel the next morning...
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jadennis

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Re: Poor kid, never stood a chance.....
« Reply #8 on: April 02, 2010, 01:42:52 PM »
So you love Alabama so much that you name your kid Crimson, but if he wants to go to Auburn that's okay? 

Yeah, I know, looking for logic from this couple is a futile task.
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"To me Auburn is not in Auburn, Alabama. Auburn is the people who care about Auburn, the people who love Auburn. Wherever they are, that’s Auburn, Auburn is in your heart. You play for it."

- Reggie Torbor

No Huddle

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Re: Poor kid, never stood a chance.....
« Reply #9 on: April 02, 2010, 02:24:41 PM »
So you love Alabama so much that you name your kid Crimson, but if he wants to go to Auburn that's okay? 

Yeah, I know, looking for logic from this couple is a futile task.

Do you think he could get in? I mean the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
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"So I want everybody to think here for a second, how much does this game mean to you? 'Cause if it means something to you, you can't stand still. You understand? You play fast! You play strong! You go out there and dominate the man you're playing against, and you make his ass quit! That's our trademark! That's our M.O.... as a team! That's what people know us as!" ~ Nick Saban

JR4AU

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Re: Poor kid, never stood a chance.....
« Reply #10 on: April 16, 2010, 05:55:52 PM »
So you love Alabama so much that you name your kid Crimson, but if he wants to go to Auburn that's okay? 

Yeah, I know, looking for logic from this couple is a futile task.

I knew a guy...a lawyer in Birmingham...he gave his two daughters middle names of War Eagle, and Tiger.  One of them, can't recall which, wound up going to UGA.  Oh, they had normal first names. 
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