I am being punished.

Ogre · « **on:** February 12, 2010, 10:50:27 AM »

I'm leaving next Thursday to head down to New Orleans for a buddy's bachelor party. My wife's birthday is Saturday, and obviously I won't be in town. I've known for weeks that this would not go unpunished, but I just didn't know what that punishment would be....until this morning.

First her mom came into town on Wednesday, which sucks in itself. I just get an email from my wife saying that we were invited by her aunt (her mom's sister) to go spend tonight with them on their lake house with my inlaws.

Shoot me in the fucking face.

They don't drink. Their idea of a good time is to sit around and drink hot cocoa by the fire and play charades and shit. It's just not my idea of fun, especially with people that I detest.

This is going to be a shitty weekend. The only thing getting me through is the fact that in exactly one week from right now, I will probably be on a craps table at Harrah's.

Tiger Wench · « **Reply #1 on:** February 12, 2010, 10:55:44 AM »

Suck it up, buttmunch. You wanna get, you have to give...

When you play charades, do naughty words with double meanings - if they are as puritanical as you say, they will never guess and you will always win.

Godfather · « **Reply #2 on:** February 12, 2010, 10:57:26 AM »

Quote from: Ogre on February 12, 2010, 10:50:27 AM

I'm leaving next Thursday to head down to New Orleans for a buddy's bachelor party. My wife's birthday is Saturday, and obviously I won't be in town. I've known for weeks that this would not go unpunished, but I just didn't know what that punishment would be....until this morning.

First her mom came into town on Wednesday, which sucks in itself. I just get an email from my wife saying that we were invited by her aunt (her mom's sister) to go spend tonight with them on their lake house with my inlaws.

Shoot me in the fucking face.

They don't drink. Their idea of a good time is to sit around and drink hot cocoa by the fire and play charades and shit. It's just not my idea of fun, especially with people that I detest.

This is going to be a shitty weekend. The only thing getting me through is the fact that in exactly one week from right now, I will probably be on a craps table at Harrah's.

Do her inlaws have a problem with their bowels?

nvm forgot they were bammers.

Tiger Wench · « **Reply #3 on:** February 12, 2010, 10:58:34 AM »

Quote from: Godfather on February 12, 2010, 10:57:26 AM

Do her inlaws have a problem with their bowels?

nvm forgot they were bammers.

bammers? OH - totally forgot that part...

borrow Sani's seat cushion and tell everyone you have hemaroids.

Ogre · « **Reply #4 on:** February 12, 2010, 11:01:23 AM »

Quote from: Tiger Wench on February 12, 2010, 10:58:34 AM

bammers? OH - totally forgot that part...

borrow Sani's seat cushion and tell everyone you have hemaroids.

I forgot to add that part. Every single one of them is a bammer.

Lurking Tiger · « **Reply #5 on:** February 12, 2010, 11:04:03 AM »

Quote from: Ogre on February 12, 2010, 11:01:23 AM

I forgot to add that part. Every single one of them is a bammer.

Kill yourself. Do it now. It will be better for you in the long run.

Buzz Killington · « **Reply #6 on:** February 12, 2010, 11:08:12 AM »

Quote from: Ogre on February 12, 2010, 11:01:23 AM

I forgot to add that part. Every single one of them is a bammer.

If they have a lake house, they must have a boat. As soon as you get there, take their boat out for a ride and get stranded.

Tiger Wench · « **Reply #7 on:** February 12, 2010, 11:11:06 AM »

Call your doc and tell him you threw your back out. Ask for some muscle relaxers. Take two, and find a corner of the couch. Even my mother is bearable when I am stoned... plus if your back is hurt, people will wait on you and stuff, and you will be excused from doing ANYTHING.

Just a thought.

Ogre · « **Reply #8 on:** February 12, 2010, 11:14:15 AM »

Quote from: Tiger Wench on February 12, 2010, 11:11:06 AM

Call your doc and tell him you threw your back out. Ask for some muscle relaxers. Take two, and find a corner of the couch. Even my mother is bearable when I am stoned... plus if your back is hurt, people will wait on you and stuff, and you will be excused from doing ANYTHING.

Just a thought.

I thought about getting in a car accident on the way home today, but I like your idea better.

Tiger Wench · « **Reply #9 on:** February 12, 2010, 11:15:15 AM »

Quote from: Ogre on February 12, 2010, 11:14:15 AM

I thought about getting in a car accident on the way home today, but I like your idea better.

Better living through chemistry, baby.

AWK · « **Reply #10 on:** February 12, 2010, 11:20:15 AM »

Take some LSD. Enjoy the ride.

chinook · « **Reply #11 on:** February 12, 2010, 11:38:58 AM »

don't you have an unexpected business trip to the mile high city? surely you got some frequent flier miles.

Saniflush · « **Reply #12 on:** February 12, 2010, 11:40:48 AM »

Leave an "upper decker" in every bathroom.

CCTAU · « **Reply #13 on:** February 12, 2010, 11:53:32 AM »

Is there a liquor specifically made for hot cocoa?

chinook · « **Reply #14 on:** February 12, 2010, 11:57:28 AM »

Quote from: CCTAU on February 12, 2010, 11:53:32 AM

Is there a liquor specifically made for hot cocoa?

i don't know about specifically but i like...

GH2001 · « **Reply #15 on:** February 12, 2010, 12:34:05 PM »

Quote from: Ogre on February 12, 2010, 10:50:27 AM

I'm leaving next Thursday to head down to New Orleans for a buddy's bachelor party. My wife's birthday is Saturday, and obviously I won't be in town. I've known for weeks that this would not go unpunished, but I just didn't know what that punishment would be....until this morning.

First her mom came into town on Wednesday, which sucks in itself. I just get an email from my wife saying that we were invited by her aunt (her mom's sister) to go spend tonight with them on their lake house with my inlaws.

Shoot me in the phuking face.

They don't drink. Their idea of a good time is to sit around and drink hot cocoa by the fire and play charades and poop. It's just not my idea of fun, especially with people that I detest.

This is going to be a poopty weekend. The only thing getting me through is the fact that in exactly one week from right now, I will probably be on a craps table at Harrah's.

damn - so sorry to hear this....

AUTiger1 · « **Reply #16 on:** February 12, 2010, 01:34:13 PM »

Ogre..............I just don't have the words. Sorry man.

Godfather · « **Reply #17 on:** February 12, 2010, 01:37:22 PM »

You married the girl.

AWK · « **Reply #18 on:** February 12, 2010, 01:39:08 PM »

Quote from: CCTAU on February 12, 2010, 11:53:32 AM

Is there a liquor specifically made for hot cocoa?

Bailey's, but I don't know if I would technically consider it a "liqour".

Buzz Killington · « **Reply #19 on:** February 12, 2010, 01:41:58 PM »

You got a cooler that will fit in your trunk? Maybe some Auburn stadium cups?
Then you are set. The bammer in-laws wouldn't dare pick up your drink if it is in an Aubren cup...