I am about ERA.  You can't have a different set of rules when it suits your needs.
Grrrr.. 
Ok.  Shortest version.  I'm capable of. 
Girl sort of kinda moved in with me many years ago.  She was maybe a little sketchy.  
Found an old box of checks from a closed account in a drawer in the bedroom. 
Wrote I don't know how many checks at convenience stores all over town.  Bought small things and wrote them over for cash back.  
I find out about this when I get arrested -- at work -- for kiting checks.  When I try to argue with the fine police officers, I get headbutted, cuffed and stuffed.  
Incarcerated -- and unaware that she had written the checks -- I use my one phone call to call her to come get me out so I can try to figure out what's going on. 
She tells me she's tired of my crap and hangs up on me.  
When I get out a few days later after finally breaking down and calling somebody else to share in my disgrace, I see a lawyer, get copies of some of the checks and realize who did what.  So I go home. 
She's there smoking dope with a bunch of scumbags.  
Apparently I just missed the sex.
Scumbags scramble.  She's not content to just get her ragged shit and leave, she's got to run her mouth.  
I closed it for her.  
First and only time I've done that.  I'd like to be ashamed of it, but I'm not.