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Kaos' way behind movie reviews

chinook

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2500 on: November 06, 2017, 06:12:42 PM »
Suburbicon

Took off today. The wifey is out of town. Took my balls with her.  Kid is in school.  I think I'll check out a movie.  I had seen the previews to this one several times and thought it looked at least minimally entertaining.  I walked out at exactly the 40 minute mark. Only the second time in my life I've walked out in the middle of a movie.

Who in the blazing, blue-ball fuck thought this would be....well....good?  I don't know what to say? Set in the 60's.  Suburbicon is the quintessential all-white town.  Cookie-cutter houses, 15X15 lawns etc.  It starts with a black family moving in.  The neighbors don't like it.  They complain.  They keep showing the black mother and her son out in the yard and people staring at them.  And that, my friends, is as far as they developed that story line in 40 minutes.

Matt Damon lives next door with his wife, her sister (Because wife is paralyzed) and their son.  A couple of thugs break in wind up killing the wife.  Damon and sister start fucking. And that, my friends, is as far as they developed that story line in 40 minutes.

That would be the sum total of what happened in 40 minutes of Suburbicon.  I don't care if at the 41 minute mark, it turned into an all out orgy in the neighborhood, Arnold Schwarzenegger appeared and started banging the black chick on a Harley while chasing the Predator alien through the countryside and Jennifer Lawrence also appeared and suddenly could act. I would rather watch Bama/Mississppi State highlights from 2005-2008 than spend another minute with this piece of shit. 

Again...who said, "Yeah, we've made a good one.  Unleash it on the public."

If you were paying attention...and doesn't look that way...there were articles out last week on the stink bomb it did in the box office.

You should have entertained yourself with Thor you would have been less gay for it.  I suppose.
« Last Edit: November 06, 2017, 06:19:18 PM by chinook »
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2501 on: November 06, 2017, 06:30:28 PM »
If you were paying attention...and doesn't look that way...there were articles out last week on the stink bomb it did in the box office.

You should have entertained yourself with Thor you would have been less gay for it.  I suppose.

You may be somewhat correct.  In all seriousness, I'm very hesitant about reading any movie reviews.  Movies, like music, are subjective.  It's all about personal taste. And it really doesn't take much to entertain me.  I readily admit that.  I'll probably go see Daddy's Home 2.  I enjoyed the first one.  Just slapstick, Will Ferrell brainless comedy. I'm good with that.

Predator is my favorite all-time movie.  Seriously bad dudes blowing shit up and making dude jokes and wise-cracks while being stalked by a badder-ass alien.  Jeez you got a big pussy.  Jeez you got a big pussy. Why'd you say it twice?  I didn't.

Come on, you can't top that.

I wasn't looking for much here.  Just keep me interested and entertained.  Holy fuck, I've never seen anything that bad.   
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2502 on: November 06, 2017, 07:05:14 PM »
You may be somewhat correct.  In all seriousness, I'm very hesitant about reading any movie reviews.  Movies, like music, are subjective.  It's all about personal taste. And it really doesn't take much to entertain me.  I readily admit that.  I'll probably go see Daddy's Home 2.  I enjoyed the first one.  Just slapstick, Will Ferrell brainless comedy. I'm good with that.

Predator is my favorite all-time movie.  Seriously bad dudes blowing shit up and making dude jokes and wise-cracks while being stalked by a badder-ass alien.  Jeez you got a big pussy.  Jeez you got a big pussy. Why'd you say it twice?  I didn't.

Come on, you can't top that.

I wasn't looking for much here.  Just keep me interested and entertained.  Holy fuck, I've never seen anything that bad.   

I promise you.  Boo 2 is worse.
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wesfau2

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2503 on: November 06, 2017, 09:35:17 PM »
Suburbicon

Took off today. The wifey is out of town. Took my balls with her.  Kid is in school.  I think I'll check out a movie.  I had seen the previews to this one several times and thought it looked at least minimally entertaining.  I walked out at exactly the 40 minute mark. Only the second time in my life I've walked out in the middle of a movie.

Who in the blazing, blue-ball fuck thought this would be....well....good?  I don't know what to say? Set in the 60's.  Suburbicon is the quintessential all-white town.  Cookie-cutter houses, 15X15 lawns etc.  It starts with a black family moving in.  The neighbors don't like it.  They complain.  They keep showing the black mother and her son out in the yard and people staring at them.  And that, my friends, is as far as they developed that story line in 40 minutes.

Matt Damon lives next door with his wife, her sister (Because wife is paralyzed) and their son.  A couple of thugs break in wind up killing the wife.  Damon and sister start fucking. And that, my friends, is as far as they developed that story line in 40 minutes.

That would be the sum total of what happened in 40 minutes of Suburbicon.  I don't care if at the 41 minute mark, it turned into an all out orgy in the neighborhood, Arnold Schwarzenegger appeared and started banging the black chick on a Harley while chasing the Predator alien through the countryside and Jennifer Lawrence also appeared and suddenly could act. I would rather watch Bama/Mississppi State highlights from 2005-2008 than spend another minute with this piece of shit. 

Again...who said, "Yeah, we've made a good one.  Unleash it on the public."

Can you judge a Coen script in 40 mins?
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2504 on: November 06, 2017, 09:40:56 PM »
Can you judge a Coen script in 40 mins?

That was almost half the movie.  Please, go see it, then come back and post.
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wesfau2

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2505 on: November 06, 2017, 10:24:23 PM »
That was almost half the movie.  Please, go see it, then come back and post.

I'll watch it at my buddy, Vlad's, house and report back.  Rubles in pocket.
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And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
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CCTAU

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2506 on: November 07, 2017, 12:01:51 AM »
If you were paying attention...and doesn't look that way...there were articles out last week on the stink bomb it did in the box office.

You should have entertained yourself with Thor you would have been less gay for it.  I suppose.


Thor was a fun movie.
Several characters missing in this one though. I guess the budget was lower.
Now that the local movie house has reclining cushioned seats and assigned seats, I don't mind as much.
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5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friends, is the beginning of the end of any nation.

Snaggletiger

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2507 on: November 07, 2017, 07:36:32 AM »
I'll watch it at my buddy, Vlad's, house and report back.  Rubles in pocket.

MAGA hat on head.
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2508 on: November 09, 2017, 01:22:35 PM »
Donnie Darko

Ummm.  Well.  Uhhhh.

Wait.... what?
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wesfau2

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2509 on: November 09, 2017, 09:39:18 PM »
Thor Ragnarok

They've amped up the camp and silliness and it makes for a fun fucking movie.

Funny cameo in the theater scene.
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2510 on: November 09, 2017, 10:37:59 PM »
Live By Night

Ben Affleck’s ode to the gangster epic. 

Holy shit this is bad.  It’s drab, flat, lifeless, plodding. Affleck as the lead is completely bland and ineffective. Affleck the director is ham fisted. The lines are cliched and delivered in cringing fashion.

What a waste of Brendan Gleeson, Zoe Saldana, Chris Cooper and the rest.

I gave up and turned this turkey off.  It’s Boo2 bad.
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2511 on: November 13, 2017, 12:27:05 PM »
Better Watch Out

Billed as a fun little Christmas home invasion movie where the trailer led you to believe the kids and their babysitter might run a modified Home Alone game on some intruders. 

The trailer was misleading.  It didn't really play out like that at all. 

The movie was interesting, pretty well acted and had a touch of violently sick humor.  It wasn't really a "Christmas" horror, per se.  The Christmas aspect was really only tangentially connected to the film in any way whatsoever.  It could have been Easter, Halloween, Fourth of July or Guy Fawkes Day.  "Christmas" played a part only in how the set was decorated. 

It comes out of Australia, most of the players were relatively unknown (and Australian) so it missed just a touch in translation, but was still fairly entertaining.

Levi Miller did a really good job playing a kid whose parental pampering left him spoiled and just a little too used to getting exactly what he wants.  The joy he took in violence and the whimpering, sniveling brat he became with the tables were briefly turned were well done.

Olivia DeJonge, also Australian and the babysitter, was cute and believable as the intensity of the situation ebbed and flowed.

Ed Oxenbould, who played DeJonge's brother when both were in film The Visit, was the unfortunate nerdy go-along-with-the-plan friend who couldn't find the exit as events spiraled beyond what he anticipated. 

A good story, probably aimed more for 15-18 year olds than for me, but I can still appreciate the effort put into the production and the way the actors handled their respective parts. 

It's not a cinematic masterpiece, but it was a cheap and easy romp with a couple of twists and turns you'll probably see coming.  Or maybe not.
« Last Edit: November 13, 2017, 12:28:39 PM by Kaos »
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2512 on: December 07, 2017, 04:12:33 PM »
Godfather I & II

I've probably watched these movies 30 times.  Every single time I figure out something I didn't know before.

In my mind they are the two best films of all time.  Every single frame, every shot, every line are all perfect. 
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chinook

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2513 on: December 12, 2017, 03:04:41 PM »
Godfather I & II

I've probably watched these movies 30 times.  Every single time I figure out something I didn't know before.

In my mind they are the two best films of all time.  Every single frame, every shot, every line are all perfect.

interested to know what you figured out this last time. 

i have a feeling Wes will tell us these movies are overrated. 
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2514 on: December 12, 2017, 03:33:47 PM »
interested to know what you figured out this last time. 

i have a feeling Wes will tell us these movies are overrated.

Shit.  I don't remember now.  It was something to do with Frank Pentangeli.  I always have a hard time understanding him. 

I've always debated what bringing his brother to the trial meant.  I go back and forth on it.  Was it a threat that Michael would harm him if Frank testified?  Or was it his brother shaming Frank into backing out of ratting because it would bring shame to the family? 

There are always little things that I catch, though.  It's just so well structured and told so well.  I don't see how you could possibly watch the film once and have any real idea what was actually going on. 
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chinook

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2515 on: December 12, 2017, 04:08:47 PM »
Shit.  I don't remember now.  It was something to do with Frank Pentangeli.  I always have a hard time understanding him. 

I've always debated what bringing his brother to the trial meant.  I go back and forth on it.  Was it a threat that Michael would harm him if Frank testified?  Or was it his brother shaming Frank into backing out of ratting because it would bring shame to the family? 

There are always little things that I catch, though.  It's just so well structured and told so well.  I don't see how you could possibly watch the film once and have any real idea what was actually going on.

I agree...I've watched this as many time as you have.

I finally found the closed caption isn't only for the deaf...keeps me from hitting the back button.

As far as the brother coming to the hearing...I think both your thoughts correlate with each other.   The brother is old school Sicilian mafia.  You don't go against the "family".  I'm not so sure Michael would have hurt Frank as much as hurting Frank's relatives. 
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2516 on: December 14, 2017, 08:23:55 AM »
Brother shaming is wrong, don't make me lock this thread
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2517 on: December 15, 2017, 02:17:13 PM »
The Last Jedi

It's OK, I guess.  Better than Force Awakens.  Not really a fan of what they have done with Luke, Leia, and Han in this new trilogy.  Middle part of the movie is pointless and boring.

 
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wesfau2

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2518 on: December 15, 2017, 09:53:26 PM »
The Last Jedi

It's OK, I guess.  Better than Force Awakens.  Not really a fan of what they have done with Luke, Leia, and Han in this new trilogy.  Middle part of the movie is pointless and boring.

 

I enjoyed the shit out of it.

Diff'rent strokes, I guess.

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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2519 on: December 16, 2017, 01:30:45 AM »
I enjoyed the shoot out of it.

Diff'rent strokes, I guess.

I really think if they had made this trilogy 100 years in the future from the end of Jedi, I'd like it a lot more.  I just can't get over that when I watch the end of Return, I see the heroes at the end, and I know that one will be a shitty father, and leave his kid, one will be a shitty instructor, and run and be a hermit on some island, and the other will be so shitty at her job, that the organization she devoted her life to fighting comes back bigger and badder.
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