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Kaos' way behind movie reviews

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2140 on: April 27, 2016, 03:32:53 PM »
Steven Seagal=Failure
Missed the point: That is the greatness of it.
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dallaswareagle

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2141 on: April 27, 2016, 04:05:40 PM »
Missed the point: That is the greatness of it.


Also, I guess they have new weight limits on SF guys.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2142 on: April 29, 2016, 12:03:39 PM »
Snaggle would you give us your review of Keanu after you see it tonight?
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2143 on: April 29, 2016, 12:17:43 PM »
Snaggle would you give us your review of Keanu after you see it tonight?

I saw it last night. He was selected 16th by the Falcons.  Big hitter that boy is.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2144 on: April 29, 2016, 12:48:29 PM »
I saw it last night. He was selected 16th by the Falcons.  Big hitter that boy is.
Don't lie...you know you gonna see it, those are your boys.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2145 on: April 29, 2016, 12:51:52 PM »
Don't lie...you know you gonna see it, those are your boys.


I admit I do like a lot of their stuff.  I also admit this shit looks laaaammme as hell.  I would only consider it if people started giving it surprisingly good reviews but I have feeling this one will be out on the Boo Rays by the end of May.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2146 on: April 29, 2016, 01:00:38 PM »
Can't wait for kaos to review this one:


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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2147 on: May 09, 2016, 09:14:20 AM »
Keanu

You know those Saturday Night Live skits they turn into movies that were great for 180 seconds on SNL but become interminable when stretched to 90 minutes for a film?

This was a little like that. 

It took a number of Key and Peele standards, mashed them together and tried to cobble an entire movie out of it.  There just wasn't enough material to sustain the film. And even at that, it was way too long.  Could and should have ended a couple of times before it finally lurched to a stop. 

The difference between the majority of the SNL-based movies and this one is that Key and Peele are actually talented.  They have enough screen presence to support the flimsy (and really sort of silly) premise. 

There are a few good moments, a laugh or two here and there (far more laughs here than Ride Along 2) and a single thin gag stretched out over far too long. 

I know they've done a ton of supporting work (more so Key than Peele) and they've proved more than adequate in those supporting roles.  If they're going to transition to leading roles on the big screen they're going to need much stronger material than this. 
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2148 on: May 09, 2016, 11:33:00 AM »
No one saw cap'n amurrica this weekend? Color me shocked.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2149 on: May 09, 2016, 11:34:45 AM »
No one saw cap'n amurrica this weekend? Color me shocked.

i did but the title of the thread says it all.

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2150 on: May 09, 2016, 11:41:34 AM »
Keanu

You know those Saturday Night Live skits they turn into movies that were great for 180 seconds on SNL but become interminable when stretched to 90 minutes for a film?

This was a little like that. 

It took a number of Key and Peele standards, mashed them together and tried to cobble an entire movie out of it.  There just wasn't enough material to sustain the film. And even at that, it was way too long.  Could and should have ended a couple of times before it finally lurched to a stop. 

The difference between the majority of the SNL-based movies and this one is that Key and Peele are actually talented.  They have enough screen presence to support the flimsy (and really sort of silly) premise. 

There are a few good moments, a laugh or two here and there (far more laughs here than Ride Along 2) and a single thin gag stretched out over far too long. 

I know they've done a ton of supporting work (more so Key than Peele) and they've proved more than adequate in those supporting roles.  If they're going to transition to leading roles on the big screen they're going to need much stronger material than this.

Even the few positives you alluded to really surprises me.  Even the premise of this one looked ridiculous and worthy of nothing more than one of their skits.   
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2151 on: May 09, 2016, 01:46:24 PM »
i did but the title of the thread says it all.

True. But never stopped anyone before. I think he kind of likes it. How else would his thread be 108 pages long by now without our expert opinions and insults?
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2152 on: May 09, 2016, 04:58:57 PM »
True. But never stopped anyone before. I think he kind of likes it. How else would his thread be 108 pages long by now without our expert opinions and insults?
You smell
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GH2001

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2153 on: May 09, 2016, 07:45:51 PM »
You smell

You wound me. Your words are beyond hurtful.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2154 on: May 11, 2016, 03:04:27 PM »
No one saw cap'n amurrica this weekend? Color me shocked.

Saw that shit. Was funny at times. Lots of shit going on in there. Not sure it served any purpose other than to set up whatever in seven hells Infinity Wars is.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2155 on: May 13, 2016, 10:48:55 AM »
Chappie
This wasn't really the movie I thought it was going to be.  But I liked it. 

Chappie the robot was endearing and funny. 

The story borrowed so heavily from Robocop and Terminator, though, that it frayed from the center out. 

The performances from Mommy and Daddy were shockingly bad as was a good bit of their entire "we have to do the heist to get $20 million" storyline.  Daddy, aka Ninja,  was a particularly poorly sketched out character bouncing wildly from emotion to emotion without any real balance.  Did he care, did he not? Do we?

Hugh Jackman's Moose-bot was so completely similar to the failed ED-209 from the Robocop series that it might as well have been a carbon copy.  It was exactly the same machine.

Buried within this uneven film, though, was a study of what makes us, well, "us."   Who are we?  Are we nothing more than the neural patterns that make up our consciousness?  Can those be manipulated? Can they be transferred?  Can they be re-created?   

I enjoyed watching Chappie play at being a gangster, struggle with the human capacity for lies and betrayal and figure out what made him tick.   I thought it was a good movie, but it bogged itself down in the dim-witted larceny of Mommy, Daddy and Amerika without giving the "Who Are We" theme enough time to properly breathe. 

Side note: Where did they get those t-shirts? 
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2156 on: May 15, 2016, 10:10:29 PM »
Captain America: Civil War

The less said about this the better. 

I just didn't enjoy it. 

Oh it was better than Batman v Superman while grappling with similar "where is the oversight" themes but that's not saying much. 

I literally didn't give one single fuck about the cat person.  I could do without fire fingers and red face too. And also spider twit. 

The "villain" such as he was added nothing and his knowledge, access, financial resources and expertise defied logic. 

Bear in mind that I don't much care for the Thor movies -- except for Loki --nor did I like either previous CA. Fuck Bucky. 

This movie just didn't have the easy elan of the great ones.  Avengers and Iron Man 1 and 3.   

This entire genre is losing its touch.  It's almost become ponderous self parody. 

It needs to end soon before it eats itself. 

My wife is dead. My mom is dead. Oh boo fucking hoo. 
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2157 on: May 16, 2016, 10:07:37 AM »
barbershop 3

It was the only one playing at the exact time I wanted to go, so why not. I like ice cube. I generally like his movies. They are silly but fun. They aren't great but if you go into them just expecting a decent movie with a few laughs, and nothing more - they are nice to watch. This one follows the same path as the first two except it's ten years later. crime is up, and Calvin is bothered by it. His son is a teenager now and the crime and gang violence is now affecting him directly. Long story short, Calvin and the folks at the barbershop try to solve the issue themselves on the streets of south Chicago. It's a mix of kumbaya, social justice warrior, some funny bits, a few hilarious characters and a happy ending. Just like the first two. Again, decent and funny for what it is. Nothing spectacular.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2158 on: May 18, 2016, 02:56:43 PM »
barbershop 3

It was the only one playing at the exact time I wanted to go, so why not. I like ice cube. I generally like his movies. They are silly but fun. They aren't great but if you go into them just expecting a decent movie with a few laughs, and nothing more - they are nice to watch. This one follows the same path as the first two except it's ten years later. crime is up, and Calvin is bothered by it. His son is a teenager now and the crime and gang violence is now affecting him directly. Long story short, Calvin and the folks at the barbershop try to solve the issue themselves on the streets of south Chicago. It's a mix of kumbaya, social justice warrior, some funny bits, a few hilarious characters and a happy ending. Just like the first two. Again, decent and funny for what it is. Nothing spectacular.

Did you get your black card stamped?
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GH2001

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #2159 on: May 18, 2016, 04:52:23 PM »
Did you get your black card stamped?

You know it.

I'm like one of the Homies now.
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