Kaos' way behind movie reviews

[GH2001]

Don't Move

I think this was on Netflix. Very intense and personal drama. There are only two main characters and two peripheral ones. Movies with a narrative that narrow require compelling actors for the leads. This one almost gets there. 

Basic storyline.  Troubled woman (Kellie Asbillie, and she's really cute) heads to a remote area to contemplate the source of her sadness. In the wilderness she runs into a guy (Finn Witrock of American Horror Story) who at first seems genuine and helpful, but who then turns into a not-so-nice adversary. 

If you've seen the trailer, you know she's in a paralytic state so that's not really a spoiler.  He drugs her, intending to have a little fun before disposing of the body.  As we learn, he's done it before. Once she's in his clutches, the remainder of the movie deals with how and if she will manage to outwit and outlast the predator.

It's pretty well done. Asbillie has to spend most of the movie acting with little more than her eyes (thankfully those eyes are expressive and really pretty).  She's pretty good at it.  Witrock is only convincing in flashes, but those flashes are pretty good.  He just didn't have the consistent menace I'd hoped to see. He's decent in times of extreme violence when he has to get out of certain situations, but just not quite enough. 

It's a decent story, only if you spend the time wondering how you'd escape a similar situation. The movie was engaging, and maintained my interest, even if some of the situations were a little out there. 

It's not going to win any awards. It's not going to be something you'll go back to again and again. It is, however, worth the one watch.

I like the cherry on top - "thank you"

[The Six]

Watched The Substance. 

[Kaos]

Brothers

Amazon Prime entry with Josh Brolin and Tyrion Lannister playing white trash brothers with criminal proclivities.  Brendan Fraser (the whale version). Marissa Tomei and Glen Close (what's she doing here) join the 'fun'.  Close is the mom, Fraser is a corrupt prison guard who is running Tyrion, and Tomei is like a weirdo spiritualist prison penpal or something.

When Tyrion goes away for a while, taking the heat for both, Brolin tries to go "straight" with his black wife and her rich family.  Then the corrupt security guard gets Tyrion out. 

It's not good.  I don't know if I can finish it.  I think it's intended to be funny, but it looks mostly like a lame payday for everybody involved.

Fraser is awful.

Ok.  I'm out.  The orangutan scene was enough.  Don't want any more of this stupid attempt at a movie.

[Kaos]

Twisters

I tried.  I really did. I liked the original Twister movie. Helen Hunt looked as good as she ever would.  Bill Paxton was great. Van Halen’s haunting “Respect the Wind” and the catchy  “Humans Being” were perfect fits. 

I wanted to like this. Wanted to in a big way.  I am so glad I didnt see it at the theater though. It would have sucked to walk out after 30 minutes. 

That’s as far as I made it at home.  Less than 30 minutes. The barrage of “yee haw” and the assault of glaringly out of place turd-sounding country “music” (and I use that term generously because it was NOT music) was absolutely more than I was willing to tolerate. 

The acting - what I saw of it - was atrocious.  I had no connection to any of the awful characters.  It was like a high school play written by a gay glee club member populated by a cast of his weirdo friends. 

Much of what I saw was a blatant ripoff of scenes from the original, done by amateurs, and done poorly.

Maybe it got better. I can’t believe it could or would. I’ll never know.  I’m marked safe from having really crappy country music banging me over the head. 

Maybe you’ll enjoy it. It’s not for me.

[Kaos]

Carry On

Die Hard for the next generation. Let me end any possible debate as to whether it’s Christmas movie.  It’s not despite featuring Christmas songs to open and end (and a few interspersed throughout). Christmas was incidental, not instrumental to the plot.

Good cast.  Taron Egerton as a TSA agent.  Jason Bateman as the bad guy.  Hank Schrader as Egerton’s boss (basically playing a different version of Hank).  Big Head Bighetti. 

Basic storyline:  Bad guy Bateman has a bag he needs to get through security and a plan to get it through.  Egerton screws up the plan by getting himself reassigned to to the bag screening bay Bateman needs to use. Plan has to be altered.

The whole film is the interplay between Bateman (who does a really good job with the calm menace required to make it work) and Egerton as one tries to execute the plan and the other tries to stop him. 

Some of the situations are ridiculous and improbable. The four-click hacker who can get into airport security cameras unnoticed is cliched and just silly.  Don’t think it can happen that way.  The bug eyed black agent (if some agency I don’t remember) overacts and fails to convince.  Completely out of her depth with the rest of the cast. 

No. It’s not a Christmas movie.  No I won’t be watching it every year. But it was good. The performances were solid (other than bug eye lady). The back and forth between Jason and Taron brought the required tension.  Bateman really delivered.

Pretty good movie.  Definitely worth a watch. 

[Kaos]

Nutcrackers

Ben Stiller makes a Hallmark movie. 

Stiller’s estranged sister dies leaving him, her only living relative in charge.  He’s a Chicago real estate hot shot. The kids are ill mannered and really weird country bumpkins. His plan is to get them into foster care as quickly as possible, leave their disheveled farm behind, get his Porsche back to the city, and resume his high pressure life.

It’s essentially a Hallmark movie so you can pretty much predict every telegraphed situation. 

The oddball kids are good.  Stiller isn’t. He’s really awkward and has real trouble with human emotion. 

About the best you can give it is… it’s cute. Once.

It’s on Hulu.

[GH2001]

Carry On

Die Hard for the next generation. Let me end any possible debate as to whether it’s Christmas movie.  It’s not despite featuring Christmas songs to open and end (and a few interspersed throughout). Christmas was incidental, not instrumental to the plot.

Good cast.  Taron Egerton as a TSA agent.  Jason Bateman as the bad guy.  Hank Schrader as Egerton’s boss (basically playing a different version of Hank).  Big Head Bighetti. 

Basic storyline:  Bad guy Bateman has a bag he needs to get through security and a plan to get it through.  Egerton screws up the plan by getting himself reassigned to to the bag screening bay Bateman needs to use. Plan has to be altered.

The whole film is the interplay between Bateman (who does a really good job with the calm menace required to make it work) and Egerton as one tries to execute the plan and the other tries to stop him. 

Some of the situations are ridiculous and improbable. The four-click hacker who can get into airport security cameras unnoticed is cliched and just silly.  Don’t think it can happen that way.  The bug eyed black agent (if some agency I don’t remember) overacts and fails to convince.  Completely out of her depth with the rest of the cast. 

No. It’s not a Christmas movie.  No I won’t be watching it every year. But it was good. The performances were solid (other than bug eye lady). The back and forth between Jason and Taron brought the required tension.  Bateman really delivered.

Pretty good movie.  Definitely worth a watch.

I concur on K's review here. I thought it was great.