Kaos' way behind movie reviews

Jumbo · « **Reply #100 on:** October 30, 2009, 02:46:19 PM »

Kaos have you checked out the new Last House on the Left yet? Some of the scenes were hard to watch, I felt bad for the victims.

AUTailgatingRules · « **Reply #101 on:** October 30, 2009, 02:49:57 PM »

Anybody seen the new saw movie yet?

Jumbo · « **Reply #102 on:** October 30, 2009, 02:53:43 PM »

Quote from: AUTailgatingRules on October 30, 2009, 02:49:57 PM

Anybody seen the new saw movie yet?

I havent yet.

AUChizad · « **Reply #103 on:** November 02, 2009, 08:37:30 PM »

I just completed watching all 8 Hellraiser flicks.

I had seen bits and pieces of a few of them (which I now recognize as 3 & 4).

It so awesomely fits into the Horror Movie franchise cliches of being ridiculously horrible by the end of their run, deteriorating bit by bit with each installment.

Here's the breakdown:

Part I: A pretty solid horror movie. Good sci-fi supernatural story that doesn't involve Pinhead much at all. He was no more central of a character than the other three Cenobites (gatekeepers of hell), except he had a couple more lines than the other one that could talk. The Cenobites were not a central part of the story anyway.

Part II: Brought back pretty much all of the central characters. Stuck to the original story, and expanded on it. Went more into explaining things like the Cenobites and the puzzle box. Solid sequel as far as horror sequels go.

Part III: The series begins heading downhill. The characters from the first two movies are abandoned, except Pinhead. It then becomes about him. They contradict the canon of the first two movies to make Pinhead a typical late-80's/early-90's Hollywood movie monster a'la Jason & Freddy who can recruit other Cenobites, which are now just basically zombies with super powers.

Part IV: Takes place in Space 400 years in the future. And partly in the present. And partly 400 years in the past. Only four parts in and it's already this ridiculous.

Part V: A murder mystery thriller with a bit of a supernatural twist. Kind of like a poor man's Se7en. Are you sure this is supposed to be a Hellraiser movie? Quite a departure for the series, but I guess on some level it's kind of cool that they abandoned the blood and guts and made it about Pinhead psychologically torturing someone.

Part VI: Basically the exact same movie as part 5, making it even more predictable. This one was made in 2002. Just enough time for Halloween H20 to come out and have been successful and them to try to steal an element that worked for it. Jamie Lee Curtis came back for that one. The main protagonist teenage girl also returned for the late Nightmare On Elm Street movie, New Nightmare. This must have been why the girl from the first two Hellraiser movies wanted to come back for this one. Clearly her part being the same girl from the first two movies was an element thrown in at the last minute. It is completely unnecessary to the plot.

Part VII: Unbelievably, has even less to do with the Hellraiser series than the last couple of movies. It was clearly written as a movie to stand on its own, and the studio that owns Hellraiser said "Hey, we'll buy it if you put Pinhead in there somehow and call it Hellraiser 7."

Part VIII: Hilariously bad acting. Like worse than most porn. Ridiculous and stupid story. Ridiculous and stupid lines. This tries to be totally hip and deals with online gaming. A bunch of teenagers are obsessed with a Hellraiser based online game, and through the game they get invited to some big party, where guess what, Pinhead kills everyone one by one. All the kids are self-aware of all of the elements from the Hellraiser series, seemingly because of the video game, not the movies. It's so god-awful it's funnybad.

Just thought I'd share. I knew each one would be worse than the one before it, yet I kept watching all 16 hours worth, and frankly, would have been disappointed if one of them had actually been better than the previous one.

Argo · « **Reply #104 on:** November 02, 2009, 10:19:09 PM »

Quote from: AUChizad on November 02, 2009, 08:37:30 PM

I just completed watching all 8 Hellraiser flicks.

I had seen bits and pieces of a few of them (which I now recognize as 3 & 4).

It so awesomely fits into the Horror Movie franchise cliches of being ridiculously horrible by the end of their run, deteriorating bit by bit with each installment.

Here's the breakdown:

Part I: A pretty solid horror movie. Good sci-fi supernatural story that doesn't involve Pinhead much at all. He was no more central of a character than the other three Cenobites (gatekeepers of hell), except he had a couple more lines than the other one that could talk. The Cenobites were not a central part of the story anyway.

Part II: Brought back pretty much all of the central characters. Stuck to the original story, and expanded on it. Went more into explaining things like the Cenobites and the puzzle box. Solid sequel as far as horror sequels go.

Part III: The series begins heading downhill. The characters from the first two movies are abandoned, except Pinhead. It then becomes about him. They contradict the canon of the first two movies to make Pinhead a typical late-80's/early-90's Hollywood movie monster a'la Jason & Freddy who can recruit other Cenobites, which are now just basically zombies with super powers.

Part IV: Takes place in Space 400 years in the future. And partly in the present. And partly 400 years in the past. Only four parts in and it's already this ridiculous.

Part V: A murder mystery thriller with a bit of a supernatural twist. Kind of like a poor man's Se7en. Are you sure this is supposed to be a Hellraiser movie? Quite a departure for the series, but I guess on some level it's kind of cool that they abandoned the blood and guts and made it about Pinhead psychologically torturing someone.

Part VI: Basically the exact same movie as part 5, making it even more predictable. This one was made in 2002. Just enough time for Halloween H20 to come out and have been successful and them to try to steal an element that worked for it. Jamie Lee Curtis came back for that one. The main protagonist teenage girl also returned for the late Nightmare On Elm Street movie, New Nightmare. This must have been why the girl from the first two Hellraiser movies wanted to come back for this one. Clearly her part being the same girl from the first two movies was an element thrown in at the last minute. It is completely unnecessary to the plot.

Part VII: Unbelievably, has even less to do with the Hellraiser series than the last couple of movies. It was clearly written as a movie to stand on its own, and the studio that owns Hellraiser said "Hey, we'll buy it if you put Pinhead in there somehow and call it Hellraiser 7."

Part VIII: Hilariously bad acting. Like worse than most porn. Ridiculous and stupid story. Ridiculous and stupid lines. This tries to be totally hip and deals with online gaming. A bunch of teenagers are obsessed with a Hellraiser based online game, and through the game they get invited to some big party, where guess what, Pinhead kills everyone one by one. All the kids are self-aware of all of the elements from the Hellraiser series, seemingly because of the video game, not the movies. It's so god-awful it's funnybad.

Just thought I'd share. I knew each one would be worse than the one before it, yet I kept watching all 16 hours worth, and frankly, would have been disappointed if one of them had actually been better than the previous one.

You should be commended for this achievement. Seriously. I've always had an interest in watching all the "classic" horror films from the start to end. This was one series I never paid much attention to.

My favorite horror movies was the "Living dead" series. Nothing better than sitting amongst friends with a few pizzas, a few beverages, and a black and white version of zombies eating brains.

Damn. Those were some good times.

AUChizad · « **Reply #105 on:** November 02, 2009, 10:24:46 PM »

Quote from: Argo on November 02, 2009, 10:19:09 PM

You should be commended for this achievement. Seriously. I've always had an interest in watching all the "classic" horror films from the start to end. This was one series I never paid much attention to.

My favorite horror movies was the "Living dead" series. Nothing better than sitting amongst friends with a few pizzas, a few beverages, and a black and white version of zombies eating brains.

Damn. Those were some good times.

I own every Friday the 13th, Nightmare On Elm Street, and Child's Play movies. I've seen all of the Halloweens and Puppet Masters too.

Had never seen any of these all the way through. Like I said, the first two are worth checking out. You can call it a day after part 5, for sure though.

Argo · « **Reply #106 on:** November 02, 2009, 10:58:28 PM »

Another one that I liked as a youngster was pumpkin head. I'm not even sure how many of those were made, but I need to try to find them. It's been a long time.

Kaos · « **Reply #107 on:** November 03, 2009, 06:33:30 AM »

Quote from: AUChizad on November 02, 2009, 10:24:46 PM

I own every Friday the 13th

Part III was as good as any of them.

Worth watching just to see the girl on the left wearing a blue bikini. I do so love a 70s body.

Buzz Killington · « **Reply #108 on:** November 03, 2009, 08:59:30 AM »

Quote from: Argo on November 02, 2009, 10:58:28 PM

Another one that I liked as a youngster was pumpkin head. I'm not even sure how many of those were made, but I need to try to find them. It's been a long time.

There were actually five of them made. I don't think anyone has actually watched 3-5 though.

Jumbo · « **Reply #109 on:** November 03, 2009, 01:05:53 PM »

Quote from: Kaos on November 03, 2009, 06:33:30 AM

Part III was as good as any of them.

Worth watching just to see the girl on the left wearing a blue bikini. I do so love a 70s body.

I have #3 on Blu-Ray cheesy but the 3d extras are cool, Friday the 13th 5 New Beginning was pretty kick ass.

Kaos · « **Reply #110 on:** November 03, 2009, 01:08:25 PM »

Quote from: Jumbo on November 03, 2009, 01:05:53 PM

I have #3 on Blu-Ray cheesy but the 3d extras are cool, Friday the 13th 5 New Beginning was pretty kick ass.

Is the BluRay #3 in 3d? Because if it is? I'm adding it to my collection.

Jumbo · « **Reply #111 on:** November 04, 2009, 05:33:46 AM »

Quote from: Kaos on November 03, 2009, 01:08:25 PM

Is the BluRay #3 in 3d? Because if it is? I'm adding it to my collection.

http://bluray.highdefdigest.com/2298/friday13thpart3.html

I had to buy, the bonus material is worth the purchase without the movie.

Snaggletiger · « **Reply #112 on:** November 07, 2009, 07:36:14 AM »

Family Movie Alert. Family Movie Alert. Family Movie Alert.

Last night, I took the fam to see A Christmas Carol with Jim Carrey. It's the 3D animation stuff, which I'm usually not into, but this was very entertaining. Carrey is just an incredibly talented actor. He's done a lot of stuff that's way out there and some people can't take his over the top style in some of his comedic roles. But, you can't deny that when he gets in to a certain character, he plays it to the hilt. I remember taking the family to The Grinch several years back and I was worried they would take a guy like Carrey and stray away from the storyline of the original cartoon that Birdman grew up with. No way. They couldn't have picked a better actor to play that part and he did the role dead on.

Same with A Christmas Carol. They stayed perfectly in time with the Dickens classic and Carrey did the characters or voices of at least 4 parts, including Scrooge. The animation and special effects were pretty good but I'm not sure why they wanted it 3D. That really added nothing to it. It was Carrey and the way they portrayed that time period that made the film. Those of you with kids or just like that story, it's worth the time in my opinion.

Kaos · « **Reply #113 on:** November 11, 2009, 01:17:05 AM »

I Love You Man

Maybe it's just me. But today's so-called "comedies" are generally slow-paced douche-fests. I don't really have anything against Paul Rudd, but he's just boring as fuck. Like Will Ferrell, he plays the same lame ass outsider fuck in every movie he makes.

This movie had a few mildly amusing moments but it dragged and dragged and dragged and dragged.

Too much homo shit.

Here's the deal. If the movie were half as entertaining to me as it appeared to be entertaining to them in the outtakes, it would be one hilarious fucking movie. But it wasn't.

Completely forgettable.

There wasn't even the redeeming feature of a naked chick or some hot pieces of ass in the movie.

It blew. Waste of time. I seriously wish it was one tenth as funny as they apparently tought it was during the making of it.

Kaos · « **Reply #114 on:** November 11, 2009, 08:11:33 AM »

We Own the Night

Any movie that opens with Eva Mendes masturbating in a sexy black dress and black stockings is going to get high marks.

While she's little more than set dressing for this film, Eva adds much.

The rest of the film, after the awesome (and far too short) opening scene is rather formulaic. I've never been a big fan of Joaquin Phoenix because he always looks like he's about to cry.

Between Phoenix, Mark Wahlberg, Robert Duvall and Tony Musante (who played Toma) the film manages to put together a fairly credible story of the black sheep son who eschews his family's cop heritage, becomes a player on the fringes of the law and then gets sucked back in when the criminal element in his midst unknowingly targets his family.

It's a decent film, not as suspensful or dramatic as it tries to be, but with enough of both to keep it moving.

There are plot holes. Is the force really going to turn a uniform over to a guy just because he's mad -- with the admonishment that he's got to go to the Academy after he's gotten his vengeance? Would veteran cops seriously turn to this newbie for leadership in the field the minute danger presents itself? Would Eva really, seriously do brooding Joaquin?

The opening fingers in the crotch scene set the bar so high, the rest of the film couldn't match it. Memo to director: Save that for the middle after you've drawn people in with the plot and characters, otherwise 30 minutes have passed and viewers are wondering just what the hell happened because they forgot to pay attention, lost in the moment.

GH2001 · « **Reply #115 on:** November 11, 2009, 09:19:58 AM »

Quote from: Kaos on November 11, 2009, 08:11:33 AM

We Own the Night

Any movie that opens with Eva Mendes masturbating in a sexy black dress and black stockings is going to get high marks.

While she's little more than set dressing for this film, Eva adds much.

The rest of the film, after the awesome (and far too short) opening scene is rather formulaic. I've never been a big fan of Joaquin Phoenix because he always looks like he's about to cry.

Between Phoenix, Mark Wahlberg, Robert Duvall and Tony Musante (who played Toma) the film manages to put together a fairly credible story of the black sheep son who eschews his family's cop heritage, becomes a player on the fringes of the law and then gets sucked back in when the criminal element in his midst unknowingly targets his family.

It's a decent film, not as suspensful or dramatic as it tries to be, but with enough of both to keep it moving.

There are plot holes. Is the force really going to turn a uniform over to a guy just because he's mad -- with the admonishment that he's got to go to the Academy after he's gotten his vengeance? Would veteran cops seriously turn to this newbie for leadership in the field the minute danger presents itself? Would Eva really, seriously do brooding Joaquin?

The opening fingers in the crotch scene set the bar so high, the rest of the film couldn't match it. Memo to director: Save that for the middle after you've drawn people in with the plot and characters, otherwise 30 minutes have passed and viewers are wondering just what the hell happened because they forgot to pay attention, lost in the moment.

Chubb alert.....whew - good lawd that lady is smokin.

Ok, anyway. Anyone heard of this new movie "Pirate Radio"? The plot sounds different and it may have peaked my interest enough to go see it in the theater. I think it comes out this Friday.

CCTAU · « **Reply #116 on:** November 11, 2009, 09:43:09 AM »

Quote from: Kaos on November 11, 2009, 08:11:33 AM

We Own the Night

Saw it. Like you I only kept watching to see when they would show Eva again. Also, this movie just props up my belief that if you want to play undercover cop, you must first get rid of the stupid chick. The stupid chicks always do something that almost gets you or them killed. Why leave protective custody to go visit your mother, therefore putting her in danger too. But she's hot so she's forgiven. It's decent enough story line. Would not watch it twice.

jadennis · « **Reply #117 on:** November 11, 2009, 10:29:12 AM »

Quote from: CCTAU on November 11, 2009, 09:43:09 AM

Saw it. Like you I only kept watching to see when they would show Eva again. Also, this movie just props up my belief that if you want to play undercover cop, you must first get rid of the stupid chick. The stupid chicks always do something that almost gets you or them killed. Why leave protective custody to go visit your mother, therefore putting her in danger too. But she's hot so she's forgiven. It's decent enough story line. Would not watch it twice.

See, you laid out the solution to a problem (get rid of the hot chick)...but then fell right back into the problem (she's too hot).

War Eagle!!! · « **Reply #118 on:** December 22, 2009, 11:35:45 AM »

I saw Body of Lies the other night with DiCaprio and Russell Crow. Pretty good movie for those that haven't seen it. DiCaprio does a pretty good job and Crow plays a lot different role than he is used to playing and did pretty good as well.

I don't remember any lines from the movie to quote like you dorks, but I can say it was one of the better movies I have seen in a while (although I don't watch a lot of movies)...

Godfather · « **Reply #119 on:** December 22, 2009, 11:42:57 AM »

K..2 that you need to see, if you have not...Inglorious Bastards and Burn After Reading.