Sham wow. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Sham wow. Sham woooowwww WHOA BITCH FUCK YOU.

[Townhallsavoy]

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0327092sham1.html

ShamWow Guy In Slap, Chop Bust
TV pitchman battered hooker in South Beach hotel room brawl
 MARCH 27--Meet Vince Shlomi. He's probably better known to you as the ShamWow Guy, the ubiquitous television pitchman who has been phenomenally successful peddling absorbent towels and food choppers. Shlomi, 44, was arrested last month on a felony battery charge following a violent confrontation with a prostitute in his South Beach hotel room. According to an arrest affidavit, Shlomi met Sasha Harris, 26, at a Miami Beach nightclub on February 7 and subsequently retired with her to his $750 room at the lavish Setai hotel. Shlomi told cops he paid Harris about $1000 in cash after she "propositioned him for straight sex." Shlomi said that when he kissed Harris, she suddenly "bit his tongue and would not let go." Shlomi then punched Harris several times until she released his tongue. The affidavit, a copy of which you'll find here, notes that during the 4 AM fight Harris sustained facial fractures and lacerations all over her face (she is pictured here in mug shots snapped following busts in 2008 and 2005). After freeing his tongue, a bleeding Shlomi ran to the Setai lobby, where security summoned cops. Harris refused to cooperate with officers, who recovered $930 from her purse. "Both parties had a strong odor of an alcoholic beverage emitting from their persons," police reported. In a brief telephone interview, Harris declined to answer TSG questions about her run-in with Shlomi, though she did say she is considering a lawsuit against the pitchman. Asked if she worked as a hooker, Harris declined comment. As seen in the below mug shot, Shlomi was also injured during the fracas and, court records show, was treated at Mount Sinai Medical Center. While Shlomi and Harris were both arrested for felony aggravated battery, prosecutors this month declined to file formal charges against the combatants. Police records list Shlomi's occupation as "Marketing," but make no mention of his affiliation with the ShamWow or the Slap Chop, both of which sell for $19.95 (plus shipping and handling). (6 pages)

[War Eagle!!!]

"Both parties had a strong odor of an alcoholic beverage emitting from their persons," police reported.

I wonder if they would have been so violent had they been smoking weed?

Just saying...

[Ogre]

That story is nice and all, but I want to know what happened when she took the mugshot on the left.  That bitch is wearing her shirt inside-out and backwards.  I guarantee there's a good story in that one.

[boartitz]

That story is nice and all, but I want to know what happened when she took the mugshot on the left.  That bitch is wearing her shirt inside-out and backwards.  I guarantee there's a good story in that one.

That's her get busted sucking dicks shirt. The photos were taken 3 years apart.

[Snaggletiger]

Hey ladies, ever have one of those wild 3 on 1's where you simply can't handle the gallons of jizz and your floor is covered?  No problem. One swipe from the Shamwow and you're good to go.


Dude obviously didn't mention he was Native American hailing from the Slapaho tribe.

[GarMan]

I wonder if they would have been so violent had they been smoking weed?

Just saying...

Yeah!  You know...  Cuz if weed waz legal and all, like nobody would do anything else, man.  There'd be like no more alcohol problems.  You know?  And, meth would like disappear, man.  You know?  And, there'd be like no more crack... or cocaine... or extasy...  Man, you know?  People would just stop at legalized weed, man.  They'd never look for anything more to get that extra buzz...  Like from Jamaican Gold, Purple Haze or anything more...  You know? 

Just sayin'... 

[The Prowler]

Yeah....man....If dey'd been hittin' dat Pinapple Express....man....dey'd be like, nah man...hehehehehehe...na'm sayin'.  Dey'd be too busy eatin' White Castle, man.

Here's a question.  A side from her getting paid to have "straight" sex, whatever the hell that means....who would be a fault here?  If a girl is clamped down on your tongue, and won't let go, what are you supposed to do? Let her bit the damn thing off?

[Pell City Tiger]

Here's a question.  A side from her getting paid to have "straight" sex, whatever the hell that means....who would be a fault here?  If a girl is clamped down on your tongue, and won't let go, what are you supposed to do? Let her bit the damn thing off?

You slap chop her ass!

[Townhallsavoy]

Yeah....man....If dey'd been hittin' dat Pinapple Express....man....dey'd be like, nah man...hehehehehehe...na'm sayin'.  Dey'd be too busy eatin' White Castle, man.

Here's a question.  A side from her getting paid to have "straight" sex, whatever the hell that means....who would be a fault here?  If a girl is clamped down on your tongue, and won't let go, what are you supposed to do? Let her bit the damn thing off?

Yes.  Haven't you been to America before? 

[War Eagle!!!]

Yeah!  You know...  Cuz if weed waz legal and all, like nobody would do anything else, man.  There'd be like no more alcohol problems.  You know?  And, meth would like disappear, man.  You know?  And, there'd be like no more crack... or cocaine... or extasy...  Man, you know?  People would just stop at legalized weed, man.  They'd never look for anything more to get that extra buzz...  Like from Jamaican Gold, Purple Haze or anything more...  You know? 

Just sayin'... 

No, I don't know. I have never done it before...

[BloodTypeORANGEandBLUE]

I guess she didn't love his nuts. 

[Pell City Tiger]

Wow, it must have been one hell of a fracas. TSG has the crime scene photos up.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0408091sham1.html

[Townhallsavoy]

I would have choked that bitch to death if she would have tried that shit with me.  That's ridiculous.  Then again, he was risking it when he asked for "straight sex" from a commercial sex worker.  

Damn...just got to the chick's pictures and feel bad.  Never hit a girl, I guess.

[Thrilla]

This guy is a traitor.  He uses hotel towels to clean up the blood?  That's just outrageous.

[Snaggletiger]

This guy is a traitor.  He uses hotel towels to clean up the blood?  That's just outrageous.

Now, that's funny.  +2

[Pell City Tiger]

This guy is a traitor.  He uses hotel towels to clean up the blood?  That's just outrageous.

No shit. Why didn't he use one of the Shamwows? He missed a golden commercial opportunity.