People are Such Gulli-Bulls

[Snaggletiger]

I just got off the phone with a former client who was asking if I could help her with something incredible that just happened to her.  She got a letter from this "attorney firm" in...ahem..Costa Rica.  Turns out, she has $793,000.00 that has built up in an escrow account.

WOW!!!

They need to liquidate this account and get the money to her and ALL she needs to do is send 10% ($7,930.00) to that firm in order for them to get everything closed out and send her the balance.  She is actually calling me to see if I would handle this for her and not go through some foreign lawyer firm she's never heard of.

She's coming in at 4:00 this afternoon.

I keed, of course.  But seriously, after I told her to contact the D.A.'s office and then promptly use the letter to wipe her ass with it, I started thinking, "Damn, there are actually people who are falling for this and sending their life savings to some towel head in Bumfuckizad, India."  I get that type of email from time to time.  You know, the one saying, "I am Itchlachibad Rotchacockoff, Emporer of the small country of Zwamwalawat.  I have $4 million in a French Bank account that I need to disburse to family in America and I am asking that we run it through your account to avoid the tax...."

With all the information available to the public on scams etc. it just blows me away that people will fall for this shit and send buttloads of money to someone they don't know.  Just my rant for the day.

[Kaos]

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!

Are you telling me that Karimbe Zabarda ISN'T going to send me $987,000?  I wired that fuck a check for $15k in January. 

And I'm not going to get the check for $50 from Bill Gates for forwarding that fucking email to 120 people, either am I?  That cheap bastard's been holding out on me for three months now. 

[War Eagle!!!]

Have you guys seen the website where people fuck with these guys? It is pretty good. You can spend hours and hours on there. I don't have the name of the site but look it up. It is great!

[Snaggletiger]

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!

Are you telling me that Karimbe Zabarda ISN'T going to send me $987,000?  I wired that fuck a check for $15k in January. 

And I'm not going to get the check for $50 from Bill Gates for forwarding that fucking email to 120 people, either am I?  That cheap bastard's been holding out on me for three months now. 

No, no.  You're okay on that one.  That's not a scam.  You should be receiving the money any day now.  Don't be surprised if they take taxes out on it first.  If they do, call me.

[Godfather]

I just got off the phone with a former client who was asking if I could help her with something incredible that just happened to her.  She got a letter from this "attorney firm" in...ahem..Costa Rica.  Turns out, she has $793,000.00 that has built up in an escrow account.

WOW!!!

They need to liquidate this account and get the money to her and ALL she needs to do is send 10% ($7,930.00) to that firm in order for them to get everything closed out and send her the balance.  She is actually calling me to see if I would handle this for her and not go through some foreign lawyer firm she's never heard of.

She's coming in at 4:00 this afternoon.

I keed, of course.  But seriously, after I told her to contact the D.A.'s office and then promptly use the letter to wipe her ass with it, I started thinking, "Damn, there are actually people who are falling for this and sending their life savings to some towel head in Bumfuckizad, India."  I get that type of email from time to time.  You know, the one saying, "I am Itchlachibad Rotchacockoff, Emporer of the small country of Zwamwalawat.  I have $4 million in a French Bank account that I need to disburse to family in America and I am asking that we run it through your account to avoid the tax...."

With all the information available to the public on scams etc. it just blows me away that people will fall for this shit and send buttloads of money to someone they don't know.  Just my rant for the day.

Thats nothin I had a lady call us at the office, our receptionist gave me the call, because she didn't have the heart to tell the woman.  Call goes like this:

Lady: Hello, I am calling from the US are you a Swiss Bank.
me: Well, our company is Switzerland based, but I am here in the US.
Lady: (not really paying attention to what I just said) Ok well good, I was wondering if you could help me with something, I got a letter the other day, that I have won some money, but it is in Nigeria, they wired the money to a bank in Switzerland, but now they are asking me for $800 dollars to transfer the money to my account here.
me: Oh no maam, have you sent these people any money?
Lady: Well I sent them a check for $1,500 dollars for lawyers fees, but now they are asking me for an additional $800 for a wire?  That seems high.
me: Ma'am this is a SCAM do not send them any more money.
Lady: (still not getting it) Yeah I thought it seemed kinda high for a wire transfer. So you don't think I will get the money then.
me: Ma'am you will not see any more of your money, please do not send them any more either. What is your email.
Lady: (gives me her email address)
me: I am going to send you a site that talks about these types of scams.
Lady: Ok well thank you so much for your help, I am glad I called, I knew $800 seemed high for a wire transfer.
me:  .......uh have a nice day.

What the fuck.....I seriously thought someone was screwing with me.

[Snaggletiger]

BK..some dude calls me AFTER I talked to her today.  Even after what I told her, she talks to some guy (the scam guy)and fucking gave him my name, saying I handle her finances.  The guy identified himself as being with some company (Which doesn't exist) and asked me if I was handling the payment of the $7,930.00. 

Actually, I was stunned and instead of thinking of something clever to mess with him, I just got pissed and started ripping him for scamming this old lady.  He hung up.  Then I called her back and was like WTF are you doing?  I told you it's a scam. Now call the D.A. and here's the number....PUTZ.

[Kaos]

People are dumb..

These things actually happened to me. 

Way back when I worked for a publishing company and was in charge of their online presence.  About a dozen websites.  When we launched new applications I'd occasionally get the overflow calls.  Here are some actual comments that I remember:

"I can't log into your chat rooms.  No, I don't have an account, I don't want to buy anything, I just want to talk to people."

"Can you just give me the number to the Internet?  You don't know what you're talking about."

"I keep mashing print, but nothing comes out.  me: what kind of printer do you have?  her: You have to have a printer?"

In a training session for people who would be running college programs and teaching disadvantaged students, I was going through the step-by-step training manual.  I noticed one woman in the back of the room who seemed lost.   When I went back there, she had the mouse pressed to the screen of the computer. 

In another training session I had a woman drop the mouse on the floor and start stepping on it.  Thought it was a pedal. 

I'm not surprised these people fall for the Nigerian scams.  Hell, I can't get my relatives to stop forwarding me the sonofabitching cookie recipe and the stupid "this kid wants a thousand emails" emails.