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Did you ever wonder....

Godfather

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Did you ever wonder....
« on: February 24, 2009, 04:16:32 PM »
New game....



Did you ever wonder....


...If your Mom gave your Dad a blow-job before she kissed you goodnight?
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AWK

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #1 on: February 24, 2009, 04:19:23 PM »
Did you ever wonder...

When was the last time your mom orgasmed?
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Redskins cornerback DeAngelo Hall said, "Guys don't mind hitting Michael Vick in the open field, but when you see Cam, you have to think about how you're going to tackle him. He's like a big tight end coming at you."

Ogre

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #2 on: February 24, 2009, 04:43:23 PM »
Have you ever wondered if you have an STD, but you are too afraid to go to the clinic to find out, so you do nothing and hope for the best?

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Thrilla

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #3 on: February 24, 2009, 04:48:16 PM »
Have you ever wondered if you have an STD, but you are too afraid to go to the clinic to find out, so you do nothing and hope for the best?



Time Out (sorry for it to be this early in the game)

Yes, I have wondered this.  So I donated blood, in hopes that anything I had would come up via that process (and I also wanted to help out those in need, blah blah blah)

So when I hear nothing 6 months later...I'm in the clear and STD free, bitches.

Time In
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Ogre

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #4 on: February 24, 2009, 04:50:39 PM »
Time Out (sorry for it to be this early in the game)

Yes, I have wondered this.  So I donated blood, in hopes that anything I had would come up via that process (and I also wanted to help out those in need, blah blah blah)

So when I hear nothing 6 months later...I'm in the clear and STD free, bitches.

Time In

Ha ha, I did the exact same thing.  And so I'm not hijacking this thread:

Did you ever wonder how out of millions of sperm, AWK was the strongest? 
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #5 on: February 24, 2009, 05:06:44 PM »
Time Out (sorry for it to be this early in the game)

Yes, I have wondered this.  So I donated blood, in hopes that anything I had would come up via that process (and I also wanted to help out those in need, blah blah blah)

So when I hear nothing 6 months later...I'm in the clear and STD free, bitches.

Time In

Time out again.  I took out an ass load of life insurance last year and as always, they do a physical, take blood etc.  But the lady doing the physical also has me sign a form saying I understand that part of it will be an AIDS test. 

I paused

I was thinking, well I never even considered the possibility of something like that but damn, when they're actually doing a test on you...

Negative, of course, but you kind of stop and say what if?

Time in..

Ever wonder when you're in a restaurant or somewhere and you see a guy you know and shake hands only to realize he just came out of the bathroom...are his hands wet because he just washed them or...?
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #6 on: February 24, 2009, 05:16:26 PM »
New game....



Did you ever wonder....


...If your Mom gave your Dad a blow-job before she kissed you goodnight?

Time out. 

WHAT THE FUCK? 

Time in. 

Did you ever wonder...

...about how much shit is slowly moving through your intestines every second of the day? 
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The Guy That Knows Nothing of Hyperbole

Godfather

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #7 on: February 24, 2009, 05:17:01 PM »
Ha ha, I did the exact same thing.  And so I'm not hijacking this thread:

Did you ever wonder how out of millions of sperm, AWK was the strongest? 
Did you ever wonder why your mother and father never had red hair?
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Thrilla

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #8 on: February 24, 2009, 05:17:45 PM »
Did you ever wonder why your mother and father never had red hair?

Time Out

His mom's pubes are red

Time In
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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #9 on: February 24, 2009, 05:19:18 PM »
From yahoo answers -

"Really sick thoughts. Family issues?
My dad is really cute for a 39 year old guy. I feel like i'm wrong for thinking such gross thoughts but I actually "like" him if you know what I mean. I have even thought about him a couple of times while masturbating. I am his only child and I've lived alone with him ever since he and my mom divorced. I don't know how to tell him this because it sounds so sick and gross. I only told my friend's mom and she said it could be because he's sort of strict with me and doesn't let me date much. What should I do about this? I have considered running away because I sometimes make myself sick thinking like this. Please don't come back with a bunch of insults or call me a whore because I am not. I am 16 and a virgin."

Did you ever wonder...


...if your own child wanted to have sex with you?
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The Guy That Knows Nothing of Hyperbole

boartitz

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #10 on: February 24, 2009, 05:20:38 PM »
Why a store that is open 24/7 has locks on the doors?
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Godfather

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #11 on: February 24, 2009, 05:24:42 PM »
Why God put that damn apple tree up?
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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #12 on: February 25, 2009, 09:14:18 AM »
... Did you ever wonder why parents would bring their two 8-10 year old kids to see Friday the 13th? I MEAN FUCKING SERIOUSLY?
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Roll Tide Bitch!

Buzz Killington

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #13 on: February 25, 2009, 09:24:37 AM »
Did you ever wonder why that old man wanted to play knick-knack paddy-whack on your knee?
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Snaggletiger

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #14 on: February 25, 2009, 09:37:38 AM »
Did you ever wonder why that old man wanted to play knick-knack paddy-whack on your knee?

Don't wonder or worry about that.  Just give your dog a bone.

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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

CCTAU

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #15 on: February 25, 2009, 10:57:40 AM »
Don't wonder or worry about that.  Just give your dog THE bone.



FTFY


You ever wonder why they can't just invent a gun that stuns people in place for 30 seconds without harming them. Never again would the words, "Shut up, bitch" have to be used.
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Five statements of WISDOM
1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the wealth out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friends, is the beginning of the end of any nation.

Godfather

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #16 on: February 25, 2009, 11:42:26 AM »
Did you ever wonder why people take babies to a sporting event?
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Buzz Killington

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #17 on: February 25, 2009, 11:47:01 AM »
Did you ever wonder why people take babies to a sporting event?
Probably so they can nurse them in public.


Do you ever wonder why you always have to turn down the radio when driving and searching for someone's house?
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

ssgaufan

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #18 on: February 25, 2009, 12:18:10 PM »
Do you ever wonder, if you are going to have a couple of young adults knock on your door one day, and say hi dad?  Even if it is in a foreign language.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Did you ever wonder....
« Reply #19 on: February 25, 2009, 12:54:27 PM »
Ever wonder why you have to press 1 for English?
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."