The New & Improved MLB Thread For 2023

[AUJarhead]

RIP Mike Shannon.  He retired last season as the voice of the Cardinals.  Was the color guy with Jack Buck starting in 1971, and moved to the lead when Buck passed away in 2002.

Won 2 Rings as a player, 1964 and 1967. 

And his Shannonisms are what we will miss most.  "Look, Jack, that couple is playing a game.  He's kissing her on the strikes, and she's kissing him on the balls..."

[Snaggletiger]

Braves pitcher, Spencer Strider, is listed at 6' 195.  He's got wicked stuff, and often brings the heat at 100 m.p.h.  I can't post pics, because I'm computerly retarded, and since the format on here was changed a while back....it's a no go. Anywayz, Strider was throwing yesterday against the Mets, and there were a lot of comments on teh socials about his jacked legs. 

When your name is Strider, you don't skip leg day.

Looks like he's trying to smuggle outside food into a theater.

[Buzz Killington]

Braves pitcher, Spencer Strider, is listed at 6' 195.  He's got wicked stuff, and often brings the heat at 100 m.p.h.  I can't post pics, because I'm computerly retarded, and since the format on here was changed a while back....it's a no go. Anywayz, Strider was throwing yesterday against the Mets, and there were a lot of comments on teh socials about his jacked legs. 

When your name is Strider, you don't skip leg day.

Looks like he's trying to smuggle outside food into a theater.

Or shoplift a couple of hams from Aldi

[Snaggletiger]

Or shoplift a couple of hams from Aldi

What's that guy's name that played for the Reds.  Position player, but he also pitched.  Freakin' jacked.

[AUJarhead]

NO! You rotten bums! You overpaid weenies! Oli Marmol, you make my butt sting! I *detest* you! You're all garbage! All of ya! Back up the truck! Back it up!

[Snaggletiger]

NO! You rotten bums! You overpaid weenies! Oli Marmol, you make my butt sting! I *detest* you! You're all garbage! All of ya! Back up the truck! Back it up!

You seem stressed.  Too much caffeine?

[AUJarhead]

You seem stressed.  Too much caffeine?

I’m reasonably sure that Rachel Phelps came out as transgender and changed her name to John Mozeliak.

[Buzz Killington]

NO! You rotten bums! You overpaid weenies! Oli Marmol, you make my butt sting! I *detest* you! You're all garbage! All of ya! Back up the truck! Back it up!

If that's not Shaquille O'Neal in left, that baby's outta here

[Snaggletiger]

Way too early look at the standings, mainly because the Braves have the best record in the NL.  Long ass season.  It'll even out, because the Mets and Phillies have too much talent to continue the suckage.  It'd be fine with me if they did.

The NL East has the Braves at 24-11, with a 7 game lead over the Mets at 17-18, and an 8 game cushion over the Phillies at 16-19.

The Central still has Pittsburgh at the top, with a 21-15 record; however, they're coming back to the pack, having gone 3-7 in their last 10.  The Baby Bears hanging around the .500 mark at 17-18.  The Red Birds.....WTF is going on, Jar?  12-24.  You need to do something about those guys.

In the West, the Dodgers are putting it back together with an 8-2 run.  They sit atop the division at 21-15.  The Padres are still writing huge checks in order to play .500 ball at 18-17.

Tampa is still the class of baseball, getting out to an eye-popping 29-7 record.  I have to say, though, that might be the best division in baseball, as every team is well over .500, with the exception of the Yank Me's at 19-17.

The rest of the American League is a whole lot of meh right now.  The Rangers off to a great start, but you know Houston will rise to the top. 

[Snaggletiger]

Quick note on hitting.  I saw one MLB ranking that had 2 Braves and 1 Cardinal in the top 10.  It was based on OPS.

Paul Goldmember is hitting .312 with 7 HR and 20 RBI.  He was ranked #9 overall.

Braves catcher, Sean Murphy was #2, with a .282 average.  9HR and 28 RBI.  That guy has been the trade of the year for us, especially with Travis d'Arnoud on the shelf most of the season.

Ronald Acuna Matada Jr. is sitting at #6 in the league, with a .338 average. 6 HR and 21 RBI.  Dude has 15 stolen bases already. 

Another note on hitting.  I actually witnessed a player square around and sacrifice bunt.  I shed a tear of joy.

[AUJarhead]

Paul Goldmember is hitting .312 with 7 HR and 20 RBI.  He was ranked #9 overall.

Three of those dingers came on Sunday vs the Tigers.

As for what's wrong...  where to start.  Arenado isn't hitting, mired in the worst slump of his career.  And we are finding out what happens when you fire a guy who isn't an analytic yes man, and you hire a guy who totally plays the analytics, and doesn't ever question the GM.  Marmol has had spats this season with Tyler O'Neil and Arenado.  Like Contreas?  He's our 18M DH.

Also, really makes you appreciate Molina, and what he was able to do calling a game, and making pitchers better.  Contreas and Knizer don't seem to be able to do it. 

[AUJarhead]

Holy shit, a winning streak.

[GH2001]

Quick note on hitting.  I saw one MLB ranking that had 2 Braves and 1 Cardinal in the top 10.  It was based on OPS.

Paul Goldmember is hitting .312 with 7 HR and 20 RBI.  He was ranked #9 overall.

Braves catcher, Sean Murphy was #2, with a .282 average.  9HR and 28 RBI.  That guy has been the trade of the year for us, especially with Travis d'Arnoud on the shelf most of the season.

Ronald Acuna Matada Jr. is sitting at #6 in the league, with a .338 average. 6 HR and 21 RBI.  Dude has 15 stolen bases already. 

Another note on hitting.  I actually witnessed a player square around and sacrifice bunt.  I shed a tear of joy.

Don't leave out Olsen you bastage.

23% of the way through the season and dude has 11 and 30.

Just a side note - Fraudulent Freddie has 5 and 14.

Anyway....

[Snaggletiger]

Don't leave out Olsen you bastage.

23% of the way through the season and dude has 11 and 30.

Just a side note - Fraudulent Freddie has 5 and 14.

Anyway....

Sean Murphy raised his average to right at .300 last night.  4 more RBI's.  This guy is centering up everything right now.

[GH2001]

Sean Murphy raised his average to right at .300 last night.  4 more RBI's.  This guy is centering up everything right now.

D'ARknow should be coming back too as the #2 and some possible help at DH.

[Snaggletiger]

Cheatin' Cards and the Small Bears going in different directions.  Cards are 8-2 in the last 10 (18-26), while the Cubs are 2-8 (19-24). Things would be a good bit different had the Birds not gotten off to such an abysmal start.

I was 6 outs away from going into a funk with the Braves down 5-3 in the 8th last night.  Rallied with 2 in the 8th, and an Orlando Arcia HR in the 9th, to take 2 of 3 from the Rangers.  The Rangers are playing well at 9 games over .500 Had they lost that game, it would have been 6 losses in the last 7 games.

Ronald Acuna Matada Jr. has now hit 5 homers of over 440 feet.  He's hitting .347 and is on pace, not that he'll do it, for a 40 HR and 60 stolen base season.  Never been done.  This guy does it all, including in the field, where he has a cannon for an arm.   

[GH2001]

Cheatin' Cards and the Small Bears going in different directions.  Cards are 8-2 in the last 10 (18-26), while the Cubs are 2-8 (19-24). Things would be a good bit different had the Birds not gotten off to such an abysmal start.

I was 6 outs away from going into a funk with the Braves down 5-3 in the 8th last night.  Rallied with 2 in the 8th, and an Orlando Arcia HR in the 9th, to take 2 of 3 from the Rangers.  The Rangers are playing well at 9 games over .500 Had they lost that game, it would have been 6 losses in the last 7 games.

Ronald Acuna Matada Jr. has now hit 5 homers of over 440 feet.  He's hitting .347 and is on pace, not that he'll do it, for a 40 HR and 60 stolen base season.  Never been done.  This guy does it all, including in the field, where he has a cannon for an arm.   

Cubs sure are paying their SS a lot of money to hit .200 with 1 hr over his last 16 games.

Speaking of - Correa is hitting about 200 for the year. Ouch.

[Buzz Killington]

Cubs sure are paying their SS a lot of money to hit .200 with 1 hr over his last 16 games.

Speaking of - Correa is hitting about 200 for the year. Ouch.

It's a tradition now.

[AUJarhead]

In case you haven't noticed, and judging by the attendance you haven't, the Cardinals have managed to win a few ball games, and are threatening to climb out of the cellar.

[GH2001]

In case you haven't noticed, and judging by the attendance you haven't, the Cardinals have managed to win a few ball games, and are threatening to climb out of the cellar.

Not that the NL East is awful - but I'm glad none of our teams are in the AL East. Would suck to be 5-6 games over .500 this early in the season and already be A LOT of games back from First and in LAST PLACE. Oh wait.....there is that one fella here that does like the Gloryholes.