If You Are Old....

[Buzz Killington]

Got DAMN.

I forget how old you fudgeers are sometimes.

Kids today.

I was going to come kick your ass for that remark.  Printed the directions from Mapquest and everything...but then I decided to take a nap on the Davenport instead.

[Snaggletiger]

We have street smarts.

As for streets, at the end of our block was a big city drainage ditch.  Great for exploring and finding snakes and other assorted creatures.  When it rained hard, it became a nice set of rapids.  We'd get the big ole black tire innertubes and jump right in.  Wind up a mile down stream.  But the huge pipes that fed into the ditch were a maze of tunnels under the streets.  Occasionally, the neighbors would see several kids climb out of the manhole cover and go about their business.   

[GH2001]

We have street smarts.

As for streets, at the end of our block was a big city drainage ditch.  Great for exploring and finding snakes and other assorted creatures.  When it rained hard, it became a nice set of rapids.  We'd get the big ole black tire innertubes and jump right in.  Wind up a mile down stream.  But the huge pipes that fed into the ditch were a maze of tunnels under the streets.  Occasionally, the neighbors would see several kids climb out of the manhole cover and go about their business. 

Oh please. Last time a garter snake got in your bathroom during one of your nightly soaks in the tub, you were calling me frantic asking how you could escape without it “biting” you. Run tell that. 

[Snaggletiger]

Damn it, that thing had beady eyes.  And the way it slithered, I could have sworn Axl Rose was in the tub with me.

[GH2001]

Damn it, that thing had beady eyes.  And the way it slithered, I could have sworn Axl Rose was in the tub with me.

Sure that was the snake?

[Saniflush]

Sure that was the snake?

Someone else's

[GH2001]

Someone else's

Preferably for him, big and black. 

[Snaggletiger]

Preferably for him, big and black.

You know me too well.

[AUTiger1]

Other things I was reminded of today in regard to being old.

1) I remember what this ball sounded like on the playground when it slammed into somebody's ribcage during dodgeball.



2) I remember what a box of crayons and a jar of Play-Doh smelled like.
3) The ka-chunk sound when the 8-track went from one section to another.  And worst of all when it broke a song in the middle while doing it.  Worst offender I can remember?  AC/DC Back in Black.  The title song on the 8-track started in program 3 and continued to program 4.  So you're rocking your ass off, the song fades out, KAA-CHUNK, then it fades back in. 
4) The sound the Evel Kneivel stunt motorcycle made when you revved it up on its red launch pad
5) The way the gyro SSP cars felt in your hand when you moved them around after pulling the rip cord (see below)
6) Swinging so high on the metal swing set that the legs came out of the ground
7) Riding the carousel in the playground while somebody pushed it in circles until they fell.  The hot metal spinner of death. 
8) Waiting all year to watch Charlie Brown Halloween, Grinch, Rudolph and Charlie Brown Christmas
9) Spirograph and Lite Brite (which doubled as the control panel/communications board when you played Star Trek)
10) Leaving the house in the morning, running in just long enough for lunch (baloney sandwich and Kool-Aid) and then hauling ass back out the door. You had to be back inside for the night when the streetlights came on.  Otherwise?  Who gave a fuck where you were?  Man, kids need that freedom today.

All of those.  The Sears catalogue and the big one was the service merchandise catalogue with all the toys.  Looney tunes and then you flip the channel to watch mid south rasslin and then WWF.  After that, you didn't come back to the house until it was dark. 

Sardines with crackers, potted meat, tuna, Baloney, SPAM or PB&J was what was on our menu. It was cheap.  To this day I still love a SPAMburger.  

[Kaos]

We have street smarts.

As for streets, at the end of our block was a big city drainage ditch.  Great for exploring and finding snakes and other assorted creatures.  When it rained hard, it became a nice set of rapids.  We'd get the big ole black tire innertubes and jump right in.  Wind up a mile down stream.  But the huge pipes that fed into the ditch were a maze of tunnels under the streets.  Occasionally, the neighbors would see several kids climb out of the manhole cover and go about their business. 

You must have lived in the same neighborhood as my grandmother.  I walked to school and back from there almost every day.   We could walk up the road and cross Tenth Street where the crossing guard was or we could walk down a side road, through a little field and then go under Tenth Street in these giant round viaduct things.  First grade and I barely even had to crouch to get through them.  I never really thought about the vermin or the likelihood of rancid piss in the trickle of water that was in there.  That's jus the way we went.  But when it rained?  All the runoff from the hills and mountains that surrounded it would power through those ditches.  Kids occasionally got swept away in that.    

I'm probably the only person on this board who made paper boats (like in IT) and set them sailing in the gutters.  Did that outside my grandmother's house too.  My brother and I would make the boats and then bet on whose would get the furthest down the block where the storm grate was.  If they didn't disappear down that and made it around the corner, that was a major victory. We'd be out there like idiots in the pouring rain chasing those things up and down the streets.  But it wasn't just us.  It was us, Pete, Cindy, Herb, Jeff, Tim and all the other kids that lived around my grandmother.  

[CCTAU]

Pete, Cindy, Herb, Jeff, and Tim are still watching Auburn football!

[Kaos]

Pete, Cindy, Herb, Jeff, and Tim are still watching Auburn football!

Pete's dead. Cindy and Jeff are (or were) Alabama fans.  Herb is dead. Tim's parents were stationed at Ft. McClellan and if I remember right he was the only Nebraska fan I'd ever met to that point. 

I guarantee you none of them are watching Auburn football.  

[Snaggletiger]

All of those.  The Sears catalogue and the big one was the service merchandise catalogue with all the toys.  Looney tunes and then you flip the channel to watch mid south rasslin and then WWF.  After that, you didn't come back to the house until it was dark.

Sardines with crackers, potted meat, tuna, Baloney, SPAM or PB&J was what was on our menu. It was cheap.  To this day I still love a SPAMburger. 

Sardines with crackers....check
Potted Meat...check
Spam....check
PB&J.....check, check, check, chicky-checkity chick.

The two things I remember my mom cooking most was tuna and rice (Simple, cheap & quick) and salmon patties fried up in that old cast iron skillet.  Those things would stink up the house for 2 nights. 

[GH2001]

Sardines with crackers....check
Potted Meat...check
Spam....check
PB&J.....check, check, check, chicky-checkity chick.

The two things I remember my mom cooking most was tuna and rice (Simple, cheap & quick) and salmon patties fried up in that old cast iron skillet.  Those things would stink up the house for 2 nights.

Potted meat on cracker - check
fried boloney sandwich- mayo and tomato (for KAOS) - checkity fuckin check all day

[Snaggletiger]

Potted meat on cracker - check
fried boloney sandwich- mayo and tomato (for KAOS) - checkity fuckin check all day

I discovered fried bologna late in life.  (Senior in high school)  Of course you had to cut out that little Pac Man slice to keep it from puffing up in the middle.  My thing was skrate up yellow mustard on white bread.  Three bites and you're right back at the frying pan with a pack of Oscar Mayer.

[Kaos]

Sardines with crackers....check
Potted Meat...check
Spam....check
PB&J.....check, check, check, chicky-checkity chick.

The two things I remember my mom cooking most was tuna and rice (Simple, cheap & quick) and salmon patties fried up in that old cast iron skillet.  Those things would stink up the house for 2 nights.

Dinner menu in my house was pretty much the same week to week. 

Sunday - Pot roast, mashed potatoes and carrots.  (Could also be pork roast, roast chicken)
Monday - Hash from the leftover sunday meal
Tuesday - Meat sandwiches (or baloney or PBJ if the Sunday leftovers ran short)
Wednesday - Tuna casserole - tuna, some kind of cream sauce, maybe peas, buttered toast on the top
Thursday - Hamburger and beans or hotdogs and beans - I made this for my kids a few weeks ago and they turned their nose up at it. 
Friday - Kentucky Fried Chicken sometimes.  The rest of the time veal cutlets and mashed potatoes or salmon croquettes. I wish I had a veal cutlet right now. 
Saturday - Whatever grandaddy grilled - usually burgers but sometimes steaks. 

That's about it.  Sometimes we'd have a lemon meringue pie or a pound cake.  I don't remember candy, pies, cakes or dessert ever being much of a thing.  We never even had cookies laying around unless they were homemade oatmeal. 

Breakfast was always oatmeal or cereal (Quisp, Capn' Crunch, Rice Krispies, Froot Loops, Apple Jacks, Corn Pops, Raisin Bran or Sugar Smacks - and there was only one box in the house until it was gone so when the box was Raisin Bran, I sulked like a bitch because I hated the FUCK out of raisin bran) and with toast or on special occasions a pop tart. 

[CCTAU]

I discovered fried bologna late in life.  (Senior in high school)  Of course you had to cut out that little Pac Man slice to keep it from puffing up in the middle.  My thing was skrate up yellow mustard on white bread.  Three bites and you're right back at the frying pan with a pack of Oscar Mayer.

Well. You rich white JD people prolly had leftover steak fried up instead!
The trick with fried bologna is to get both sides brown instead of just the edge of one side. 

[Snaggletiger]

Dinner menu in my house was pretty much the same week to week. 

Sunday - Pot roast, mashed potatoes and carrots.  (Could also be pork roast, roast chicken)
Monday - Hash from the leftover sunday meal
Tuesday - Meat sandwiches (or baloney or PBJ if the Sunday leftovers ran short)
Wednesday - Tuna casserole - tuna, some kind of cream sauce, maybe peas, buttered toast on the top
Thursday - Hamburger and beans or hotdogs and beans - I made this for my kids a few weeks ago and they turned their nose up at it. 
Friday - Kentucky Fried Chicken sometimes.  The rest of the time veal cutlets and mashed potatoes or salmon croquettes. I wish I had a veal cutlet right now. 
Saturday - Whatever grandaddy grilled - usually burgers but sometimes steaks. 

That's about it.  Sometimes we'd have a lemon meringue pie or a pound cake.  I don't remember candy, pies, cakes or dessert ever being much of a thing.  We never even had cookies laying around unless they were homemade oatmeal. 

Breakfast was always oatmeal or cereal (Quisp, Capn' Crunch, Rice Krispies, Froot Loops, Apple Jacks, Corn Pops, Raisin Bran or Sugar Smacks - and there was only one box in the house until it was gone so when the box was Raisin Bran, I sulked like a bitch because I hated the FUCK out of raisin bran) and with toast or on special occasions a pop tart.

I was one of three children.  And cereal was the mainstay of our breakfast options as well.  Frosted Flakes, Cocoa Krispies, Capn' Crunch etc.  And yes, we went through a Quisp and Quake phase as well.  The key to cereal eating as a kid was to be the first to open a fresh box.  That meant you got to dig your grubby little paws all through the contents to get whatever exciting prize that lay within.

[Snaggletiger]

Well. You rich white JD people prolly had leftover steak fried up instead!
The trick with fried bologna is to get both sides brown instead of just the edge of one side.

Bologna snob.

[GH2001]

Well. You rich white JD people prolly had leftover steak fried up instead!
The trick with fried bologna is to get both sides brown instead of just the edge of one side.

well that's a first for me.....hearing rich and JD in the same statement. No offense Snags. 

Snags makes a good point though with the pac man shapes.....very important. And a good juicy TOMATO.