Saturday Recap
A) Bama. Oh noooesss! Twinkle Tubbalooba hurted his widdle ankle. Saban says he'll be out a week or two. I don't know about the medical miracles they have planned for him but I once had an old coach tell me that you get a certain type of player (I won't say) with an ankle tweak and you might as well write them off for the season. And I saw it real life. Best WR the coach had rolled his ankle week two. Anybody else ices, gives it a little rest and is good to go. This guy (who had college potential) gimped the entire season. The clown will be back for our game, but I wouldn't bet my house that he'll be back or effective for LSU. This will be a bigger point later, but I only watched a few drives of the UT/UAT game and the blatant holding by the Tide line was egregious and got zero flags. Double handfuls of jersey, pulling down from behind. Unreal. I also heard the announcers blowing Tupkin Turdweeder, claiming he was "the nation's most accurate deep ball passer." That's not close to true. If you look at the stats, he's not anywhere near the top. Where that clown makes his stats? He leads the country in passes that travel less than ten yards in the air, but go for 20+ yards. No college QB has a higher number of YAC. You know who actually IS the most accurate at the deep throw? Joe Freaking Burrow -- by a wide margin.
B) Speaking of LSU... Want to know how scary good that team can be? Orgeron was so confident they'd demolish Mississippi State in the end that he refused to let Burrow throw deep for the entire first half. LSU freaking TOYED with the Bulldogs, in their (glorified high school) house just to see how the defense would react when the offense wasn't putting up gaudy numbers. The Bengals used that game as practice. We do not match up well with them. Over-under on pass interference calls against AU is six. Doesn't bode well.
C) South Carolina got raped by the officials in a loss to Florida. I try not to buy into the "SEC Refs are paid for" conspiracy theories, but SC got completely abused. Muschamp is gonna get fined for calling them gutless, but he should have just whipped their asses on the field.
D) Georgia. I'm beginning to think this isn't a very good team.
E) Missouri - Haha. Vandy should win more often. Mason's post-game field interview was gold.
F) A&M. $75 million gets you one half step above Mississippi State. Maybe.
G) Badger Badger. Bad. Hated to see that, actually, but if they're pretenders better to be exposed now before Alabama gets them in the first ever playoff meeting that includes a three loss team and destroys them.
H) Big 10 -- other than Ohio State? All bad. They are who they've always been and every team in that league will get its dook pushed in against upper level SEC competition. We AH Penn State! And you nearly got dusted by a shit Michigan team during your white out. I call fraud on the entire league, with the exception of OSU, which is almost due for the annual Columbus bed shitting.
I) Pac 12 -- disgusting. Every team in that league is gutter trash.
J) Trevor Lawrence is the ugliest goober I've ever seen. Clemson is a mediocre team playing in the shittiest conference in the country. The only shot left to keep them out of the playoffs is South Carolina -- and I think that's a distinct possibility if they continue to play like they have been.
K) Oklahoma - I'm not ever going to be one of those who thinks Jalen Hurts is some great human being because he accepted his backup role. Or that he's doing well now because he learned so much under Saban. I will say that in the fawning over Taboola Tangleslog (and in service to whatever promises/enticements were made to his parents in order to coerce them to move their ENTIRE FAMILY from Hawaii to bumfuck allerbammer) I think Hurts was misused and abused in Turdscaloosa. He's been taken off the leash in Oklahoma. He does benefit tremendously from facing whatever excuses for defense exist in that sorry conference the Sooners play in, but the kind of stats he's popping out would be hard to do against air -- which is what those sad ass defenses essentially are. When OU gets into the playoffs and faces a fast, athletic defense I expect Hurts to regress back into an only slightly improved version of the same bumfuzzled, indecisive cat he's always been.
I'm having a hard time liking college football these days. The combination of Saban and the playoffs has really ruined it. The season used to be interesting when the bowls mattered and there was not the current caste system.
Three classes of programs:
1) Those that are assumed to be IN the playoffs and have to play their way out of it, and sometimes it doesn't even matter if they suck or not. Clemson, Alabama, Oklahoma, Ohio State, to a lesser extent Oregon and for reasons unknown now, Georgia . Season starts with the pre-ordained determination that those are the programs to beat and then they have to really, really fuck it up to be ruled out.
2) Those that could make the playoffs, but they'd have to do something really special to qualify. One loss? Oh, kiss my ass. You're out! AlaBAMuh can lose a game, but LSU or Auburn probably could not. Teams in this tier include LSU, Auburn, Florida, Washington, Michigan, Penn State, Texas, FSU, and maybe Miami.
3) Teams that aren't getting in no matter what in the hell they do. I'm looking at you Boise and UCF. Now between level 2 and 3 there are a ton of programs that slip back and forth. Like Missouri. They could potentially get in, but they'd have go undefeated, win the division and the SEC and hope that a team like, say, Texas or USC wasn't sitting there with one loss. A Missouri wouldn't get the same benefit of the doubt LSU might.
It ruins the season for me. When you're three weeks in, lose because your QB had a shit day and then the entire rest of the season is just an exercise to stay out of the Shreveport Bowl? It sucks the life out of it.
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