Yeah, this is long, but the season is over.
The inevitable speculation is already starting concerning Malzahn's future at Auburn. Logical and somewhat rational thinking would indicate that Auburn backed itself into a corner and paying anything close to the epic buyout they negotiated would make them the laughing stock of college football and the business world. However, many AU fans feel it justified based on the laughable, one-sided contract given to a coach who has not lost less than 4 games in 5 years now. Will it happen? I have no clue. Nor does anyone else, and methinks many are getting trolled by the rumors and in-your-end-OH's being offered as comedy relief by rival fans.
But let's play along and go totally hypothetical here. What if they canned Gus tomorrow? Well, one thing I can say for certain about that is if they did, they already had a plan in motion. But let's take that in another direction. Gus is gone and the coaching search is on. My question, as the title indicates, is does Auburn have the intention, much less the desire or ability, to make the "Home Run Hire"?
First, you have to define home run hire. Probably different in everyone's mind. Let me give you mine. A coach who is a proven winner at the highest level, be it college or pro. One who is strong willed enough to come in and say, "The hell with the way you've been doing it. You hired me. Now you're going to do it my way." Alabama did that with Saban. He was a winner everywhere he went, sans Miami, and is just the type of egotistical, zero personality bastard to make that happen. Plus, he has a fan base and boosters that live and die according to what the Tahd is doing on the football field and are willing to do whatever it take$ to make $ure he ha$ the re$ource$ needed to get the job done. Doesn't hurt to be suck buddies with the NCAA Prez who turns a blind eye to everything.
Okay, so home run hires. Well, geez Snags, who is out there? First off, take all that bullshit about, "He ain't coming." "Auburn can't get him". "He has too much baggage". "I don't like him because..."....and throw that crap in the toilet. Nick Saban is an ASSHOLE!!! He acts like a 3rd grader who just had someone cut in line in front of him in the lunch room. He has the people skills of Joy Behar and Woopi Goldberg being keynote speakers at the Republican National Convention. He wins and wins big. The hell with everything else.
Who? Bob Stoops. Dabo Swinney. Urban Meyer. Well there's 3 right there off the top of my head. Am I pushing for any of them? No, just throwing YUGE names against the wall, all of which would fucking kill. Before you go and start poking holes in any of them, first think about the coaches themselves. Meet all the criteria above. What about money? Geez, you assholes are talking about scraping up $32 million plus about $6 million more just to get our current staff to leave. You think money is somehow an issue? Not at Auburn. Go ahead, think of some more BIGLY names out there.
But would Auburn ever do it? Despite the fact that they've thrown this obscene amount of money at a HORRIBLE coach like Malzahn, I truly don't believe they would ever go Bruce Pearl where the football program is concerned. (Pearl sucks BTW) Look at our history:
Shug retires....Doug Barfield.
Barfield fails...Pat Dye. I was around for the Dye hire. He had done a decent job at East Carolina and Wyoming. We lucked out big time and found a diamond in the rough. Home run hire? Not even close.
Dye exits and in comes...Terry Bowden. A collective..."Who". Terry Bowden, the former head coach of Salem and Samford. I won't even address home run hire.
Bowden goes Pffffffft....in comes Tommy Tuberville. I liked the hire. Did a good job at an NCAA sanction strapped Ole Miss. Certainly didn't make any waves around college football.
So Tommy takes his $5 million buyout and Auburn moves on to 5-19 Gene Chizik. Need I say more?
Chiz blows up and we form a search committee that comes up with a former high school coach who has one year of HC experience in the Sun Belt.
Folks, that dates back 40 years. Our history says there's no way in hell we'd ever go for the fences with our next football hire. No way we ever say, "Just this once, let's see if we can take it to the next level and stay there." We have the facilities. We have the fan base. We have the tradition. We're in the best conference in America. And we have the money. The question is not about what you think of any possible HR hires. The question is simply, would Auburn ever go there?