So maybe I'm old...

[Kaos]

Watched some of the Billboard Music Awards last night with the girls.  Maybe I just don't get it any more. 

Drake?  The fuck.  Complete and total talent abyss.  Nothing new or interesting about that slice of spam.

The new "song" by Miley Cyrus?  Fucking DREADFUL.  It was pathetic.  I've heard better from a drunk grandmother doing karaoke.

Whatever the shitty hell that was from Lordes (or whatever her name was).  I'd rather sit through a sixth-grade tap dance recital with 400 students than be subjected to that twitching spasm again.  It was an assault on the senses and not in a good way. 

The country fuck, Sam Stone, Mike Hunt or whatever his forgettable name was?  "gawt brayuds ahn harr hayyurrhhh..."   There's no excuse for those kind of shittacular lyrics or that horseshit twang.  If that is considered "music?"   Feed me a couple of cans of Busch's baked beans, put me in a bathroom with decent acoustics and I'll fart you out something that will sell billions.  I guarantee you my fartphony would sound better than whatever the bleeding fuck that was on the stage. 

Even Puff Diddy Daddy P. Dummy looked like a fucking fool.  His movie trailer was shit.  His declaration of Chris Biggie Wallace as the "greatest rapper he's ever worked with" really served to prove just how far behind Ruthless, Death Row and Aftermath his weak ass label really is and was.  Biggie (and I liked the guy) had a couple of decent albums -- albums that couldn't hold a birthday candle to what was being produced by Dre, Snoop or Cube -- and a handful of barely memorable singles. He's only remembered because he got killed, not because he was that good.  Piddy is a legend in his own mind and his pathetic attempt to glom onto the success of Straight Outta Compton with that lame ass movie about himself showed how worthless he is. 

That show may have been the worst thing I've ever watched.  So little talent.  So little self awareness.  The worst of it all may have been Miley's sister.  She looked like a used fuckbag bought from a Dollar General. 

FWIW, I heard the word "icon" tossed around a lot during that shit too. Cher, Billy Ray Cyrus, Biggie, Diddy, and who knows how many others were tagged with that label.  No.  Just no.