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Let's Simplify Things

Snaggletiger

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Let's Simplify Things
« on: September 20, 2016, 05:00:06 PM »
Here are some quotes from Gus from his presser today, courtesy of the dot I am a gay twerker that has no balls!!!!  I also have no idea how to use the quote function to post stories, so I annoy the piss out of others.  I like male genatalia in and around my mouth..

"I've been at Auburn for seven years now, experienced some very good times, a few rough times," Malzahn said. "The last two losses have probably hurt me worse than any of the others. I fully understand our fan base is disappointed, and they should be.

"The bottom line is we've got to coach our players better, and that starts with me. The fact is, we're close. As a matter of fact, we're real close to being a good team and we're going to get this thing turned around."


He's right on both counts, IMO.  His fan base is disappointed.  Are they real close to turning it around?  Well, it's not a matter of the team "getting it" or gellin' like a felon.  This team is talented, top to bottom.  The defense has been salty and sexy from word go.  Our backs have proven they can get it done at this level.  Our line is okay but could be better.  You can laugh at this all you want but we've got talented receivers out the wazoo.  And we've got a QB that can definitely be damn skippy, if they weren't having him run the same offense as Nick Marshall. So, why are we real close?

Because all it will take is a trip to the doctor for a quick Cranio-rectal Inversion procedure, allowing Gus Malzahn to get his HEAD OUT OF HIS ASS!!!

Here's how simple it is.  Go into the archives and pull out the tapes of 2009. Great season?  Nope, not really.  But with Chris Todd at the helm, Auburn averaged 33.3 points a game.  He threw for 22 TD's and 6 Int's.  They were balanced on O, rushing for 212 yds a game and tossing it around for 220.  Ben Tate had just over 1,400 yards.  We had no defense or depth, which resulted in 8-5.

We are infinitely more talented overall on both sides of the ball.  Stop...running...the....read option!!!  Let Sean White do what he do.  It's that simple.  But I'm 100% certain we are NOT "real close" as long as he keeps on with this style offense.

Now that I say that, they'll stay exactly the same and beat LSU by 30.
« Last Edit: September 20, 2016, 05:09:58 PM by Snaggletiger »
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dallaswareagle

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #1 on: September 20, 2016, 05:16:47 PM »
Here are some quotes from Gus from his presser today, courtesy of the dot I am a gay twerker that has no balls!!!!  I also have no idea how to use the quote function to post stories, so I annoy the piss out of others.  I like male genatalia in and around my mouth..

"I've been at Auburn for seven years now, experienced some very good times, a few rough times," Malzahn said. "The last two losses have probably hurt me worse than any of the others. I fully understand our fan base is disappointed, and they should be.

"The bottom line is we've got to coach our players better, and that starts with me. The fact is, we're close. As a matter of fact, we're real close to being a good team and we're going to get this thing turned around."


He's right on both counts, IMO.  His fan base is disappointed.  Are they real close to turning it around?  Well, it's not a matter of the team "getting it" or gellin' like a felon.  This team is talented, top to bottom.  The defense has been salty and sexy from word go.  Our backs have proven they can get it done at this level.  Our line is okay but could be better.  You can laugh at this all you want but we've got talented receivers out the wazoo.  And we've got a QB that can definitely be damn skippy, if they weren't having him run the same offense as Nick Marshall. So, why are we real close?

Because all it will take is a trip to the doctor for a quick Cranio-rectal Inversion procedure, allowing Gus Malzahn to get his HEAD OUT OF HIS ASS!!!

Here's how simple it is.  Go into the archives and pull out the tapes of 2009. Great season?  Nope, not really.  But with Chris Todd at the helm, Auburn averaged 33.3 points a game.  He threw for 22 TD's and 6 Int's.  They were balanced on O, rushing for 212 yds a game and tossing it around for 220.  Ben Tate had just over 1,400 yards.  We had no defense or depth, which resulted in 8-5.

We are infinitely more talented overall on both sides of the ball.  Stop...running...the....read option!!!  Let Sean White do what he do.  It's that simple.  But I'm 100% certain we are NOT "real close" as long as he keeps on with this style offense.

Now that I say that, they'll stay exactly the same and get beat by LSU by 30.

More likely.   

Never thought I would say this, but right now I believe Les is a better coach than Gus.
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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'

The Six

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #2 on: September 20, 2016, 11:15:27 PM »
get beat by LSU by 30.

LSU hasn't scored 30 yet. We haven't given up 30 yet. Ain't gonna happen Saturday either.

Auburn's winning 16-13. Mark it down.
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dallaswareagle

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #3 on: September 20, 2016, 11:46:04 PM »
LSU hasn't scored 30 yet. We haven't given up 30 yet. Ain't gonna happen Saturday either.

Auburn's winning 16-13. Mark it down.

hope your right. I am afraid of to many three and outs and the defense just wears out.
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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'

chinook

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #4 on: September 21, 2016, 01:09:03 AM »
hope your right. I am afraid of to many three and outs and the defense just wears out.


don't you mean "hope your write"? 
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The Prowler

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #5 on: September 21, 2016, 09:10:35 AM »
hope your right. I am afraid of to many three and outs and the defense just wears out.
Yup, then Leonard Fournette starts getting big chunks of yardage.

Next Tuesday at Coach Malzahn's presser..."We have to do a better job at getting them ready, the game plan didn't work as well as we'd hoped, we're close, so close...like the closest ever. Know how close we are? Really close."
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bgreene

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #6 on: September 21, 2016, 09:19:56 AM »
Yup, then Leonard Fournette starts getting big chunks of yardage.

Next Tuesday at Coach Malzahn's presser..."We have to do a better job at getting them ready, the game plan didn't work as well as we'd hoped, we're close, so close...like the closest ever. Know how close we are? Really close."

We're so close that I can feel the fans pain
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Godfather

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #7 on: September 21, 2016, 09:32:18 AM »
We're so close that I can feel the fans pain
I feel so bad I bought myself another BMW just to feel better
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ssgaufan

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #8 on: September 21, 2016, 09:38:04 AM »
bammer fans are calling him, our Mike Shula.   :sad:
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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #9 on: September 21, 2016, 09:42:09 AM »
bammer fans are calling him, our Mike Shula.   :sad:

At least his offense could score 20+ in SEC games.
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dallaswareagle

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #10 on: September 21, 2016, 10:13:21 AM »

don't you mean "hope your write"?


Posting from my TV remote, so it auto corrects.
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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'

The Six

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #11 on: September 21, 2016, 12:34:44 PM »
Yup, then Leonard Fournette starts getting big chunks of yardage.

Next Tuesday at Coach Malzahn's presser..."We have to do a better job at getting them ready, the game plan didn't work as well as we'd hoped, we're close, so close...like the closest ever. Know how close we are? Really close."

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WiregrassTiger

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #12 on: September 21, 2016, 12:37:58 PM »
Yup, then Leonard Fournette starts getting big chunks of yardage.

Next Tuesday at Coach Malzahn's presser..."We have to do a better job at getting them ready, the game plan didn't work as well as we'd hoped, we're close, so close...like the closest ever. Know how close we are? Really close."
Are you trying to say that we aren't close?
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jmar

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #13 on: September 21, 2016, 08:19:25 PM »
Are you trying to say that we aren't close?
We are distancing ourselves from the pack.
Nothing can stand in our way.
Only Aubie beat Aubie, WDE!
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The Prowler

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #14 on: September 21, 2016, 09:47:25 PM »
Are you trying to say that we aren't close?
So close...no matter how far away...
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"The HUNH does cause significant Health and Safety issues, Health issues for the opposing fans and Safety issues for the opposing coaches." - AU AD Jay Jacobs

Buzz Killington

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #15 on: September 21, 2016, 10:46:58 PM »
Are you trying to say that we aren't close?
Just as close as I am to dating Olivia Munn.  So close!
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Snaggletiger

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #16 on: September 21, 2016, 10:59:48 PM »
Just as close as I am to dating Olivia Munn.  So close!

You're dating Olivia Munn?  Damn, that gym membership is really paying off.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Buzz Killington

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Re: Let's Simplify Things
« Reply #17 on: September 21, 2016, 11:02:17 PM »
You're dating Olivia Munn?  Damn, that gym membership is really paying off.
I'm huge, Jerry!
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.