No offense, K, but i wouldn't want your ass in the Oval Office either.
Now wait just a minute. My platform would include:
A full investigation of the Alabama football program by the FBI and IRS including all current and former players. That would be followed by the abolition of the program, seizure of BDS and the destruction of the same.
I would then eliminate the IRS and replace it with a sales tax on all items save groceries and clothes. To make it so that the poor would not scream the percentage would be weighted so that "sin" items like alcohol, cigarettes, weed and porn as well as items deemed "luxury" would be taxed at a higher rate.
I would end federal regulation of and interference in education and morality. States rights would be returned to the state.
I'd eliminate half the federal agencies and use the money saved to boost defense spending and the federal highway programs.
I'd ban houndstooth.
I'd use my position to bang coeds at every college campus in the USofA. Except the all male colleges, that is.
I'd make a great president, definitely better than Hillary.