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The Bama fan was disappointed...

Kaos

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The Bama fan was disappointed...
« on: January 18, 2016, 11:13:24 PM »
When he went to the Great Wall of China and didn't find a buffet.
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If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

wesfau2

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #1 on: January 19, 2016, 09:07:26 AM »
 :facepalm:
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Snaggletiger

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #2 on: January 19, 2016, 09:38:33 AM »
ROR
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

GH2001

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #3 on: January 19, 2016, 09:48:57 AM »
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WDE

Buzz Killington

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #4 on: January 19, 2016, 10:03:35 AM »
Dey jest angry cause dey gots all dem teefbrushes and no teef
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Kaos

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #5 on: January 19, 2016, 10:37:05 AM »
When he went to the Job Fair and couldn't get any cotton candy. 
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If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #6 on: January 19, 2016, 10:40:23 AM »
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The Guy That Knows Nothing of Hyperbole

Buzz Killington

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #7 on: January 19, 2016, 10:41:52 AM »
This guy walks into a bar in Tuscaloosa and orders a white wine. Everybody sitting around the bar looks up, surprised and the bartender looks around and says: “You ain’t from around here, are ya… where ya from, boy?”
The guy says, “I’m from England.”

The bartender asks, “What th’ hell you do in England?”

The guy responds, “I’m a taxidermist.”

The bartender asks, “A taxidermist… now just what th’ hell is a taxidermist?”

The guy says, “I mount animals.”

The bartender grins and shouts out to the whole bar, “It’s okay boys, he’s one of us!”
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

WiregrassTiger

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #8 on: January 19, 2016, 10:54:45 AM »
Why did we need to start a new bad jokes thread? Did we lose some gigabyte storage or something?
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Snaggletiger

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #9 on: January 19, 2016, 10:58:24 AM »
I was in London the other day and got mugged by two Chinese guys.

The police have it narrowed down to 45,000 suspects. 


Bada Bing.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

dallaswareagle

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #10 on: January 19, 2016, 03:36:51 PM »
What is 20 feet long and has 5 teeth?

 The funnel cake line at the Alabama state fair
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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'

Kaos

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #11 on: January 19, 2016, 03:52:37 PM »
When he went to Shoe Carnival and there were no clowns.


Format dammit.  Format.
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If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

The Prowler

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #12 on: January 19, 2016, 04:31:52 PM »
A blind man walks into a bar, a table and a chair.
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"Patriotism and popularity are the beaten paths for power and tyranny." Good, no worries about tyranny w/ Trump

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Pell City Tiger

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #13 on: January 19, 2016, 04:38:45 PM »
when he showed up at the family reunion and realized he'd left his pack of condoms in the pocket of his other pants.
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"I stood up, unzipped my pants, lowered my shorts and placed my bare ass on the window. That's the last thing I wanted those people to see of me."

Snaggletiger

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #14 on: January 19, 2016, 04:49:21 PM »
when he tried to press any key to continue, he couldn't find a key that said "any".
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Token

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #15 on: January 19, 2016, 04:53:58 PM »
When he clicked on the movie thread to see which new movies were worth watching, only to find someone's head smashed on the asphalt with their eyes popped out. 
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Buzz Killington

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #16 on: January 19, 2016, 04:58:56 PM »
When he clicked on the movie thread to see which new movies were worth watching, only to find someone's head smashed on the asphalt with their eyes popped out.
FORMAT!  Oh wait...
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

The Six

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #17 on: January 19, 2016, 04:59:28 PM »
when he showed up at the family reunion and realized he'd left his pack of condoms in the pocket of his other pants.

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"I'm sick of following my dreams...I'm just going to ask them where they are going and hook up with 'em later." - Mitch Hedberg

Snaggletiger

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #18 on: January 19, 2016, 05:15:38 PM »
when he found out Fleetwood Mac was not a new hamburger at McDonald's.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

The Six

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Re: The Bama fan was disappointed...
« Reply #19 on: January 19, 2016, 07:43:39 PM »
when he logged into eHarmony.com and was automatically redirected to Ancestry.com.
« Last Edit: January 19, 2016, 08:03:21 PM by The Six »
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"I'm sick of following my dreams...I'm just going to ask them where they are going and hook up with 'em later." - Mitch Hedberg