Looking for something new and gave two new series a shot.
DigSeries openers should give you enough to pull you in and hook you. They should give you a reason to want to come back for more. I realize you can't give the entire story away in the opener, but the viewer should not sit there at the end of it and go "what the fuck was that about?"
Good acting with the exception of Anne Heche. Interesting locations. But just too much of a miasma of swirling stories that will probably eventually be connected, but are pretty far apart right now.
Huge, huge problem I had? Girl reminds main character of his long lost and presumed dead daughter. She's the spitting image apparently. So he follows her and tries to fuck her. I'm sorry, but a grieving dad isn't going to try to fuck his daughter's look alike.
The show swizzled red cows, hasidic jews, dead clones, pentecostal preachers, Gale Boetticher, a fake jessica chastain, bright red heads, muslims, sacrificial lambs, chanting, the ark of the covenant and anne heche getting a stiff weiner while fully clothed.
Just too much going on to be cohesive. It didn't leave me hooked and wanting more, it left me confused and not really caring all that much.
The Returned Yes, I realize that for a show that focuses on people who return four years after they died without having aged and unaware that they've been gone you have to suspend reality. But...
People have to act in ways that would make some sort of rational sense.
The first returnee is a teenage girl. Her room is exactly as she left it four years ago, her bed is made up and sheets fresh enough to sleep in and her robe is still hanging on a hook on the back of the door. No dust has gathered, no sagging fabric. It's just exactly as it was, no worse for wear. And her toothbrush is there, ready to use. This despite the fact that mom has divorced dad and shacked up with Jeremy Sisto during her absence. The house is so exactly the same that she didn't notice anything amiss.
And the mom is just like... oh, cool, you're back. This is weird, but let me hug you and put you to bed.
If somebody who died four years ago walked back into my house I'd have a nervous breakdown probably. I wouldn't just go "hey, baby..." and let them walk upstairs to take a bath. I wouldn't calmly call my ex wife and say "hey, come over. daughter's home..." And the Jeremy Sisto psychiatrist guy wouldn't be all "hey, just get some rest and if you want to talk we sure can!" Hell no. Utterly stupid reactions and in no way realistic. They didn't call ANYBODY, no cops or doctors or hospitals or FBI or CIA or anything. Just "come on, honey, hop into bed and get you some rest.." Bullshit.
The second one who shows up is some young boy. And this doctor woman just takes him in. Lets him stay with her. Pretends like she's going to call the cops but doesn't. That's bullshit. Nobody is going to let a random kid into their house, feed them and then let them sleep on the couch. The allegations of sex abuse would start before dawn. Having that as a reasonable and rational response to a strange kid standing at a bus stop is absolutely absurd.
The complete and total lack of realism in the reactions of those seeing the returned put me off. I don't think I can watch this any longer.
And that brings me to...
Bonus!
Helix I no longer care about this ridiculous story at all. The muddled mess that was the end of the snow season has transmuted over to an island setting with even more asinine setups. I've come to hate Beardy McDoctorfuck and his rage-face brother. But I record it and watch it every week for a few small things.
1. Jordan. I think the immortal Jordan Hayes as Sarah Jordan is really damn cute. She's not stop you dead gorgeous or super sexy or anything, but she's just cute. I enjoy watching her.
2. Japanese guy
Really bad dialogue and almost indecipherable accent, but delivered so seriously that it takes on a life of its own.
3. The other immortal
Not really that hot, but a really good lower half. Nice legs and midsection.
Eh, you take what you can get.
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