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If You...

Snaggletiger

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If You...
« on: September 04, 2013, 10:37:57 AM »
want to get some still shots of Jake "Dead Cockroach" Holland on his back, Saturday night should give you plenty of opportunities.  It appears ASU will come at you with run after run after run.  Looks like we'll see the complete opposite of what Leach threw at us.  coppage de la pasta al. I am a gay twerker that has no balls!!!!  I also have no idea how to use the quote function to post stories, so I annoy the piss out of others.  I like male genatalia in and around my mouth.

The pass-happy attack Washington State employed against Auburn on Saturday left the Tigers' linebackers out of their comfort zone and sometimes entirely off the field.  But that likely won't be the case against Arkansas State.

Facing off against a Red Wolves offense that ran the ball 57 times in its season-opener, Auburn needs much more production out of its linebacker trio of Kris Frost, Jake Holland and Cassanova McKinzy on Saturday. "I was disappointed with some of the things they did against the run, but they weren't always the problem," defensive coordinator Ellis Johnson said. "We had some busted stunts. We had some other fit issues that weren't the linebackers."

For the most part, McKinzy never got a chance, playing just 19 snaps in the opener. Auburn spent most of its time in a dime package to counter Washington State's four and five-receiver sets, and in the dime, the "Will" linebacker comes of the field in favor of a sixth defensive back. McKinzy made two tackles in his 19 snaps, less than a fourth of the 88 plays the Cougars ran.

He'll get more chances to play his brand of physical football against Arkansas State. Even last season, McKinzy thrived against running teams, where his aggressive, downhill nature matches the style of play. At this point, he's not a candidate to play the Mike position in the Dime.

"We were playing six DBs the vast majority of the game," Johnson said. "The will linebacker was not even on the field."  Washington State's scheme put all of the linebacker pressure on the Mike, a role shared by senior Jake Holland and sophomore Kris Frost on Saturday.

Frost and Holland split the reps, although Frost replaced Holland twice on second-half drives after a big Washington State gain on the first play of the series.  Frost finished with four tackles, nearly matching the five he made in limited action all of last season, although he also struggled at times to diagnose receivers out of the backfield. Holland, on the other hand, failed to record a defensive statistic and missed several tackles in the open field, although he had fewer mental busts than Frost.)

"I think Frost probably had a little bit more production, but he had a couple of (missed) mental assignments that Jake didn't have," Johnson said. "I thought their play against the run was B-minus, C-plus. Got to improve."

Auburn is going to need a better performance on Saturday against Arkansas State.  The Red Wolves produced four 100-yard rushers in their season-opening blowout of Arkansas-Pine Bluff, and lead back David Oku is a former Tennessee runner who has big-time talent.  Now, after a week where the secondary rose to the occasion, Auburn turns to its linebackers, along with the front four.

"We'll learn a lot more against more of a running team," Auburn coach Gus Malzahn said. "Sometimes when teams pass the ball as much as they did, it takes the linebackers kind of out of the game. I think we'll learn more as we go, the more we face running teams."
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

bottomfeeder

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Re: If You...
« Reply #1 on: September 04, 2013, 10:42:04 AM »
CGM should move Jake to offense with all of his jukes and janks.  :facepalm:
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Saniflush

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Re: If You...
« Reply #2 on: September 04, 2013, 10:47:27 AM »
CGM should move Jake to offense with all of his jukes and janks.  :facepalm:

When we need to stop the clock we could give him the ball and he could spike himself.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

bgreene

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Re: If You...
« Reply #3 on: September 04, 2013, 10:53:56 AM »
When we need to stop the clock we could give him the ball and he could spike himself.

 :haha:
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"Men are made stronger on the realization that the helping hand they need is at the end of their own arm."

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WiregrassTiger

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Re: If You...
« Reply #4 on: September 04, 2013, 11:23:25 AM »
When we need to stop the clock we could give him the ball and he could spike himself.
^^In the words of the late and great Johnny Carson, "Good stuff".
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dallaswareagle

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Re: If You...
« Reply #5 on: September 04, 2013, 11:36:13 AM »

 Holland, on the other hand, failed to record a defensive statistic and missed several tackles in the open field, although he had fewer mental busts than Frost.)

Motherfuck me running, he wasn't even in position to fall on a pile and get 1/2 credit.  :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:
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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'

Snaggletiger

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Re: If You...
« Reply #6 on: September 04, 2013, 11:44:36 AM »
Leave Jake the hell alone, people.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Kaos

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Re: If You...
« Reply #7 on: September 04, 2013, 11:58:48 AM »
Motherfudge me running, he wasn't even in position to fall on a pile and get 1/2 credit. 


We've been over this.  Did you not believe me the first two times I said no tackles, no assists and provided the chart as proof?
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WiregrassTiger

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Re: If You...
« Reply #8 on: September 04, 2013, 12:08:39 PM »

We've been over this.  Did you not believe me the first two times I said no tackles, no assists and provided the chart as proof?
Well, no, he didn't. And the rest of us didn't but now that Snaggs put it up, we know it's true.
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jmar

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Re: If You...
« Reply #9 on: September 04, 2013, 12:15:05 PM »
Well, no, he didn't. And the rest of us didn't but now that Snaggs put it up, we know it's true.
Do we or don't we receive extra credit for visual aids? That's all I want to know.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: If You...
« Reply #10 on: September 04, 2013, 12:15:49 PM »
Hear me now but believe me last Tuesday.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

dallaswareagle

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Re: If You...
« Reply #11 on: September 04, 2013, 12:31:54 PM »
Leave Jake the hell alone, people.

We should, he leaves everybody alone.
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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'

dallaswareagle

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Re: If You...
« Reply #12 on: September 04, 2013, 12:34:50 PM »

We've been over this.  Did you not believe me the first two times I said no tackles, no assists and provided the chart as proof?

Yes, I believed you, I just can't fathom it, but after watching the DVR last night I understand. I truly believe he is afraid of contact. Even on the first interception where he had a chance to peel back and block he simply put out one hand and pushed the guy.   
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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'

WiregrassTiger

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Re: If You...
« Reply #13 on: September 04, 2013, 12:46:03 PM »
Yes, I believed you, I just can't fathom it, but after watching the DVR last night I understand. I truly believe he is afraid of contact. Even on the first interception where he had a chance to peel back and block he simply put out one hand and pushed the guy.
Look, he just doesn't like conflict. That's all. He'll make the tackles when they really count. During the SEC champ game, he'll be an impenetrable wall.

 Unfortunately, he will likely be playing touch with some sorority girls back in Auburn while that game is being played. But, still I bet they won't score on him.
« Last Edit: September 04, 2013, 12:48:28 PM by WiregrassTiger »
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Saniflush

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Re: If You...
« Reply #14 on: September 04, 2013, 12:46:09 PM »
Even on the first interception where he had a chance to peel back and block he simply put out one hand and pushed the guy.

See this is completely what I don't understand.  As a defensive guy I would be looking for blood on an interception.  You can get a head of steam and basically fuck somebody up.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

bgreene

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Re: If You...
« Reply #15 on: September 04, 2013, 12:53:37 PM »
See this is completely what I don't understand.  As a defensive guy I would be looking for blood on an interception.  You can get a head of steam and basically fuck somebody up.

But Jake is a sweet, compassionate person.  He cares about the birds in the sky, and the little bugs on the ground.  He wouldn't hurt a soul!
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"Men are made stronger on the realization that the helping hand they need is at the end of their own arm."

                -Sidney Phillips

jmar

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Re: If You...
« Reply #16 on: September 04, 2013, 12:54:40 PM »
Look, he just doesn't like conflict. That's all. He'll make the tackles when they really count. During the SEC champ game, he'll be an impenetrable wall.
Perhaps we can fit him with a cloaking device.

Too nerdy?
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jmar

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Re: If You...
« Reply #17 on: September 04, 2013, 12:57:10 PM »
But Jake is a sweet, compassionate person.  He cares about the birds in the sky, and the little bugs on the ground.  He wouldn't hurt a soul!
He's also well spoken.
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dallaswareagle

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Re: If You...
« Reply #18 on: September 04, 2013, 01:03:34 PM »
He's also very concerned about the environment.


They never have to wash his uniform.
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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'

WiregrassTiger

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  • Don't touch Tappy, he's a service tiger.
Re: If You...
« Reply #19 on: September 04, 2013, 01:06:09 PM »
He's also very concerned about the environment.


They never have to wash his uniform.
See, now I'll have to admit that this is funny. Some of your better stuff is about Jake. At the same time, I really am concerned that he is going to hunt you down and whip that ass after he graduates. That's why I don't make fun of Jakester. I take up for him. On second thought, this shit wasn't funny. It was mean. You are a meany.
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