So, if you're Johnny Fucking Football...

[Tiger Wench]

What do you do during your half game suspension?

Sit in the stands and sign autographs? (h/t The New Girl)

Nail all the hot female cheerleaders... oh, wait.  Never mind... (h/t Jarhead)

Any others?

[CCTAU]

Stay in the locker room and be announced as the second half starter coming out of the tunnel after the half. Smoke, band, cheerleaders, etc..

Screw the NCAA. Act like it never happened.

[Buzz Killington]

Take in the first half of the Texas game.

[noxin]

Take in the first half of the Texas game.

Then he should arrive at midfield in a helicopter during the halftime show

[Kaos]

Go to Tuscaloosa by jet and twerk AJ's girlfriend. 

[Buzz Killington]

Go to Tuscaloosa by jet and twerk AJ's girlfriend.

/Thread

[Townhallsavoy]

What should he do?

Stand on the sidelines and help his 2nd string quarterback run the office while listening to what Coach Sumlin says.

What will he do?

See how many times he can helicopter his penis before someone asks him to stop. 

[noxin]

Go to Tuscaloosa by jet and twerk AJ's girlfriend.

He rides a horse, she rides a cowboy

[dallaswareagle]

What do you do during your half game suspension?

Sit in the stands and sign autographs? (h/t The New Girl)

Nail all the hot female cheerleaders... oh, wait.  Never mind... (h/t Jarhead)

Any others?

Set up a table on the concourse and sign autographs with a donation jar to under privilege NCAA quarterbacks.