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Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1

wesfau2

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Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1
« on: March 20, 2013, 03:08:30 PM »
So we're in the midst of this year's edition of spring break here on the Emerald Coast and here are my thoughts:

1) Whoever brought back the high-waisted, 1982 denim short look should be strangled.  These fine female forms are being distorted by shitty fashion;

2) This year's crop may be the least responsible, most littering bunch of shitheads we've ever had.  Except the Auburn fans...as noted in the "Isolated Incident..." thread

3) This is the first year when I really, truly cannot tell if the kids are in high school or college.  They all look 16.

4) For all the hassle, I'm happy to trade drunken teenagers for the tight-fisted, grouchy, and generally unpleasant snow birds.
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Re: Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1
« Reply #1 on: March 20, 2013, 03:17:33 PM »
Are you in Destin?

I just got back from Rosemary Beach and spent a good bit of time in Seaside. 

1.  I noticed the denim shorts and first thought, "wow, redneck," then noticed tight asses hanging out the bottom of them amongst the frayed ends and thought, "wow, hot redneck asses." 

2.  Rosemary Beach is the classiest beach I've ever been to, and honestly, I don't think I'll ever stay anywhere else unless money is the issue.  I noticed more Auburn fans there than anywhere I've ever been on the Gulf Coast, and the only bammer I saw was this shithead kid that used my lunch table at a restaurant to brace his Mountain Dew so he could open it. 

3.  This was the year where I decided to say, "I don't care if she's 16." 

4.  Agreed.  Seaside at night was miserable.  Hundreds of high schoolers just running around like it was recess.  I avoid Gulf Shores and Orange Beach because of the riff-raff rednecks and teenagers, and I don't want to experience that shit on 30a. 
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The Guy That Knows Nothing of Hyperbole

wesfau2

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Re: Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1
« Reply #2 on: March 20, 2013, 03:32:37 PM »
Are you in Destin?


Yep.  Living the dream.

Rosemary is nice, Mr. Fancypants.
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Re: Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1
« Reply #3 on: March 20, 2013, 03:35:01 PM »
Yep.  Living the dream.

Rosemary is nice, Mr. Fancypants.

Rich friends let us use their place for free.  More like Mr. Blessedpants.  In fact, we've been three times in the last year without paying a dime.
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The Guy That Knows Nothing of Hyperbole

wesfau2

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Re: Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1
« Reply #4 on: March 20, 2013, 03:36:11 PM »
Rich friends let us use their place for free.  More like Mr. Blessedpants.  In fact, we've been three times in the last year without paying a dime.

And nary a phone call.

Not feeling the love, yo.
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Saniflush

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Re: Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1
« Reply #5 on: March 20, 2013, 03:37:33 PM »
And nary a phone call.

Not feeling the love, yo.

He'll fill the cup.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Snaggletiger

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Re: Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1
« Reply #6 on: March 20, 2013, 03:43:52 PM »
My penis is throbbing with envy. 

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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Re: Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1
« Reply #7 on: March 20, 2013, 03:56:14 PM »
My penis is throbbing with envy.

Don't worry.  I'm sure Wes will save some tight-fisted, grouchy, and generally unpleasant snow birds for you. 
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The Guy That Knows Nothing of Hyperbole

Snaggletiger

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Re: Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1
« Reply #8 on: March 20, 2013, 04:22:59 PM »
Don't worry.  I'm sure Wes will save some tight-fisted, grouchy, and generally unpleasant snow birds for you.

Put some lotion in that tight fist and it's on.  I'm not choosey. 
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Vandy Vol

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Re: Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1
« Reply #9 on: March 20, 2013, 06:21:17 PM »
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"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on." - Dean Martin

CCTAU

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Re: Observations from Spring Break 2013, pt 1
« Reply #10 on: March 21, 2013, 03:39:25 PM »
Rich friends let us use their place for free.  More like Mr. Blessedpants.  In fact, we've been three times in the last year without paying a dime.

We got a name for people like you.......


Family!
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Five statements of WISDOM
1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the wealth out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friends, is the beginning of the end of any nation.