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The Sharing Of Marriage

loyadyBed

The Sharing Of Marriage
« on: August 09, 2012, 01:28:19 PM »
The Sharing Of Marriage (humor)
 
The old man placed an order for one hamburger,
French fries and a drink.
 
He unwrapped the plain hamburger and
carefully cut it in half, placing one half in front of his wife.

He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife.
 
He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them
.... As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people around them were looking over and whispering.
 
Obviously they were thinking, 'That poor old couple - all they can afford is one meal for the two of them.'
 
As the man began to eat his fries a young man came to the table and politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple. The old man said, they were just fine - they were used to sharing everything
 
People closer to the table noticed the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite. She sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink.
 
Again, the young man came over and begged them to let him buy another meal for them.
This time the old woman said 'No, thank you, we are used to sharing everything..'
 
Finally, as the old man finished and was wiping his face neatly with the napkin, the young man again came over to the little old lady who had yet to eat a single bite of food and asked 'What is it you are waiting for?'
 
She answered
« Last Edit: August 09, 2012, 02:41:44 PM by Godfather »
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Buzz Killington

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #1 on: August 09, 2012, 01:29:39 PM »
WHAT THE HELL DID SHE SAY?????????????!?!?!?!?!?!?
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Snaggletiger

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #2 on: August 09, 2012, 01:46:08 PM »
Wait for it....
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Saniflush

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #3 on: August 09, 2012, 01:49:26 PM »
She said...


"Me so horny."
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Snaggletiger

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #4 on: August 09, 2012, 01:58:32 PM »
She said...


"Me so horny."

Turn around, stick it out, even white boys have to shout
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

djsimp

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #5 on: August 09, 2012, 02:09:07 PM »
Now I know why this was not posted in the "Joke of the Day" thread.
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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #6 on: August 09, 2012, 02:26:10 PM »
Arrrggghhhhhh this is driving me nuts.


What the fuck did she say?!!!!
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"That's what." -She

Godfather

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #7 on: August 09, 2012, 02:41:09 PM »
The Teeth
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Gus is gone, hooray!
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Kaos

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #8 on: August 09, 2012, 02:42:58 PM »
She said....

We're cool. I just poisoned his ass. 
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If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

djsimp

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #9 on: August 09, 2012, 02:45:14 PM »
The Teeth

Thats not even funny.


By the way, I see you looking at me.
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Buzz Killington

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #10 on: August 09, 2012, 02:50:35 PM »
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #11 on: August 09, 2012, 02:55:34 PM »
Oh Gawd.

They share the teeth. They fucking share the teeth.

Arrrgggghhhhhhhhh..... :puke:
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"That's what." -She

AWK

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #12 on: August 09, 2012, 03:24:22 PM »
penisboob.
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Redskins cornerback DeAngelo Hall said, "Guys don't mind hitting Michael Vick in the open field, but when you see Cam, you have to think about how you're going to tackle him. He's like a big tight end coming at you."

Buzz Killington

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #13 on: August 09, 2012, 03:26:50 PM »
Worst first post EVAR?

Nevermind...I forgot about Jake.
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Snaggletiger

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Re: The Sharing Of Marriage
« Reply #14 on: August 09, 2012, 03:29:05 PM »
Worst first post EVAR?

At first, I thought Jake's song was the worst.  But then after listening a few more times I realized...Good hip hop does still exist.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."