Announcer: Today we salute you, Mr. Delusional, Irrational Alabama redneck football Fan....
Announcer: Season after season, year after year, you try to justify how Bama is back and ask why aren't we ranked higher.
Backup singer: Why aren't we number one??
Announcer: You scramble to make futile attempts explaining why the Tide cannot keep a coach longer than it takes Bear Bryant to take a dump
Backup singer: Hope he wipes my face with his toilet paper!
Announcer: Inevitably, you'll bring up the past, and boast of championships won 20 years before you were born.
Backup singer: We wore leather helmets!!
Announcer: You will point out that you have dominated college football and won 12 national championships.
Backup singer: So does Minnesota and Harvard!
Announcer: Be proud that the last seven years Alabama is eighth in the conference in SEC wins going 26-30.
Backup Singer: That's two more than Ole Miss!!!
Announcer: Go on, ignore that home loss to La Tech, Central Florida, Northern Illinois along with never beating Auburn in Tuscaloosa .
Backup Singer: That's what I call a home field advantage.
Announcer: And lets not forget not beating the "mediocre" team from the same state in the last 5 years.
Backup singer: That's about 2200 days since a win!!
Announcer: And continue to believe that you'll actually win a National Championship in three years with Savior O Saban
Backup singer: Not worth the 32 million with no buyout clause!!!
Announcer: So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, oh Emperor of Excuses, and take comfort knowing that when you don't finish in the top 25, you'll be guaranteed to be back to championship status when the season comes back around next year.
Backup singer: Mr. Delusional, Irrational and Hopelessly Pathetic Crimson Tide Fannnnnnn!
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