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Alabama Destinations

AUTiger1

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #60 on: June 03, 2011, 04:18:16 PM »
Why? Had she been Doing Jay?

and why haven't you contributed a good drunk story to this thread yet?
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Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

There are gonna be days when you lay your guts on the line and you come away empty handed, there ain't a damn thing you can do about it but go back out there and lay em on the line again...and again, and again! -- Coach Pat Dye

It isn't that liberals are ignorant. It's just they know so much that isn't so. --Ronald Reagan

djsimp

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #61 on: June 03, 2011, 04:23:09 PM »
and why haven't you contributed a good drunk story to this thread yet?

Because they're still a part of pending court cases.
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AUTiger1

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #62 on: June 03, 2011, 04:29:25 PM »
Because they're still a part of pending court cases.

Very well could be the truth. 

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Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

There are gonna be days when you lay your guts on the line and you come away empty handed, there ain't a damn thing you can do about it but go back out there and lay em on the line again...and again, and again! -- Coach Pat Dye

It isn't that liberals are ignorant. It's just they know so much that isn't so. --Ronald Reagan

Tiger Six

Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #63 on: June 03, 2011, 04:33:03 PM »
Big Lots is calling yore name boy!



You know why commercials for above ground pools are only 30 seconds?  Because that is the maximum amount of time you can show people haveing fun in an above ground pool.

"Ok, now what?  Should I throw the ball to Billy?  Or put on some goggles and look at his knees?"
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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #64 on: June 03, 2011, 04:37:10 PM »
and why haven't you contributed a good drunk story to this thread yet?

When I was co-oping in Atlanta there were a couple of guys that I hung out with who had been hired in right out of school (one from Miss St, the other USCe - the Jam Master Jay drunk caller) so we would drink and talk a lotta smack after work about the SEC.   Well my next to last day we started at lunch by going to this  :tits: bar in Marietta called Boomers (it also had an all you can eat buffet, and you can bet there was some high quality there, both on the stage and on your plate). 

After work we went to this Mexican restaurant that had free chips and salsa, gigantic mugs of beer, and karaoke.  We finished up at the house these two guys were splitting up in Woodstock.  His place was the perfect just out of college house, hardwood floors, huge bonus room, a half working pinball machine, a cheap pool table, and an old glass bottle dispensing Coke machine full of cheap beer. 

Some other people from work showed up and I was already pretty well smashed by then.  We started doing shots of tequila except for this one guys wife who refused, so I started drinking her shots also.  Next thing I know I had crawled out onto his back deck and had my chin resting on the railing so I could puke 15 feet down to the ground.  The sober wife is freaking out that I am going to die, which seemed like a pretty good idea at the time.  They got me back inside and that's the last I remembered for a while. 

I woke up about 8:00 the next morning (we were supposed to be at work at 7:30) and stood up.  I had fallen asleep in the middle of his living room floor (hardwoods remember?) and something was killing my chest.  I looked down and somebody had pulled my shirt off and rolled me onto some twist off beer caps two of which were at this point were imbedded into my chest.  I went to go puke again in the bathroom, I tried opening the door to his hall bath but it would only move about 6" and then stop.  Things were getting dire at that point so I started throwing my shoulder into the door and finally I heard from the other side, "Stop it, man."  USCe guy had decided to just pass out in the bathroom and I was crushing him up against the cabinet.  I went to wake up the homeowner (Miss St guy) and he was asleep buck naked on top of his covers. 

We made it to work about 9:30 with me in the same clothes I had spent most of the night puking in.  One guy came in and gave me a, "Hey, B! Heard yall tied...."  He then got a whiff and turned and high tailed it out.  I didn't get a lot of people coming up to shake my hand and tell me bye, they mostly did it from a distance.


There was also the time I took a nap while my friends went around looking for me under a truck in the AGR parking lot at Auburn.


Or the time that we had a party at my apartment at Concourse Apt's and Chris Porter showed up, which was kinda like having Snoop Dogg and Shaft all rolled into one showing up at the revenge of the nerd's frat house.
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You meet a man on the Oregon Trail. He tells you his name is Terry. You laugh and tell him: "That's a girl's name!" Terry shoots you. You have died of dissin' Terry.

AUTiger1

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #65 on: June 03, 2011, 04:59:47 PM »
The sober wife is freaking out that I am going to die, which seemed like a pretty good idea at the time.  They got me back inside and that's the last I remembered for a while. 

 Things were getting dire at that point so I started throwing my shoulder into the door and finally I heard from the other side, "Stop it, man."  USCe guy had decided to just pass out in the bathroom and I was crushing him up against the cabinet. 

That is killing me, b/c first I have uttered the words, "please just let me die"  and have passed out on the bathroom floor thinking before I passed out "oh sweet jesus, this is cold on my face."
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Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

There are gonna be days when you lay your guts on the line and you come away empty handed, there ain't a damn thing you can do about it but go back out there and lay em on the line again...and again, and again! -- Coach Pat Dye

It isn't that liberals are ignorant. It's just they know so much that isn't so. --Ronald Reagan

Snaggletiger

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #66 on: June 03, 2011, 05:26:32 PM »
You drunk bastards. 

Back in my much...uh....younger days, I had been known to partake of the herbal essence.  This is not a too drunk to function story but more one of those Cheech & Chong WTF just happened occasions.  Playing baseball and coming back from a road trip from scenic Selma, Alabama one night, me and 2 other guys had listened to a doobie brothers song and were kicked back, gotten kind of quiet.  I was in the back seat and just kind of staring out the window while we drove down this winding country road.  All of a sudden, the lights hit this huge cow right on the side of the road.  Must have missed him by 3 inches....it was like there and gone in a flash.

I sat up real quick and noticed that neither of the other two guys said anything or gave any reaction.  So, in my current altered state, I started questioning whether that was real or just my mind playing tricks on me.  But damn, I know I saw it.  How could they not have seen....I ain't sayin' anything.  But I know I.....it was like 2000 pounds 3 inches from the car....they had to see it......what the hell?

We drove on for about 10 more miles and no one said a word until the driver goes..."Hey...did you guys see that cow?" 

Nobody could stop laughing til we got home. 
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

AUTiger1

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #67 on: June 03, 2011, 05:31:29 PM »
I have a couple that I might share later, depends on how much I have to drink tonight.....................
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Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

There are gonna be days when you lay your guts on the line and you come away empty handed, there ain't a damn thing you can do about it but go back out there and lay em on the line again...and again, and again! -- Coach Pat Dye

It isn't that liberals are ignorant. It's just they know so much that isn't so. --Ronald Reagan

AUTiger1

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #68 on: June 03, 2011, 06:37:06 PM »
Snaggle:  I used to love those "deep thoughts by Jack Handy" moments when partaking of the herb.  I once had a lengthy discussion about how my right hand gets jealous of my left hand b/c it gets to draw, write, throw a ball, hold a fork....etc...etc...etc while my left hand doesn't do anything.  Also talked about "what if" the world was actually living in a drop of dew on a single blade of grass.  Good times!
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Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

There are gonna be days when you lay your guts on the line and you come away empty handed, there ain't a damn thing you can do about it but go back out there and lay em on the line again...and again, and again! -- Coach Pat Dye

It isn't that liberals are ignorant. It's just they know so much that isn't so. --Ronald Reagan

wesfau2

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #69 on: June 03, 2011, 06:44:41 PM »
Or you (and me, and the bro in law) scrounging around kappa sig stealing people's booze after the season opener last year.

Amateurs.

Godfather and I waltzed into the broadcast crew's breakfast, loaded our plates in the middle of everyone, and walked right out.

Ole Miss game two years ago.
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #70 on: June 03, 2011, 07:41:29 PM »
Snaggle:  I used to love those "deep thoughts by Jack Handy" moments when partaking of the herb.  I once had a lengthy discussion about how my right hand gets jealous of my left hand b/c it gets to draw, write, throw a ball, hold a fork....etc...etc...etc while my left hand doesn't do anything.  Also talked about "what if" the world was actually living in a drop of dew on a single blade of grass.  Good times!

I don't know why the call them fingers, I've never seen them fing.  Oh, there they go.
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You meet a man on the Oregon Trail. He tells you his name is Terry. You laugh and tell him: "That's a girl's name!" Terry shoots you. You have died of dissin' Terry.

djsimp

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #71 on: June 03, 2011, 09:01:08 PM »
Amateurs.

Godfather and I waltzed into the broadcast crew's breakfast, loaded our plates in the middle of everyone, and walked right out.

Ole Miss game two years ago.

I think that would actually be fun. CBS, Lincoln, ESPN?
« Last Edit: June 03, 2011, 09:02:12 PM by djsimp41 »
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chinook

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #72 on: June 04, 2011, 12:50:10 AM »
I lived at Tamarack for two years...

i lived there from fall of '92 - spring '93.   can't say how many knocks on the door... axing for donations.  they promised it was going towards food for the family.  the ice cream truck...well let's just say they served more than 31 flavors. 
« Last Edit: June 04, 2011, 12:51:49 AM by chinook »
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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #73 on: June 04, 2011, 01:02:35 AM »
i lived there from fall of '92 - spring '93.   can't say how many knocks on the door... axing for donations.  they promised it was going towards food for the family.  the ice cream truck...well let's just say they served more than 31 flavors.

My wife lived there from '96-'98, that damn ice cream truck was still running in the project 10 hours a day in the middle of winter.
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You meet a man on the Oregon Trail. He tells you his name is Terry. You laugh and tell him: "That's a girl's name!" Terry shoots you. You have died of dissin' Terry.

Saniflush

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #74 on: June 04, 2011, 06:36:18 AM »
I think that would actually be fun. CBS, Lincoln, ESPN?

I will testify to this, cause they cut me out.  We were in the new student union and due to amount of imbibed alcohol the previous evening and that very morning, I had to get to the facilities for I had to pee outta my butt.  When I finally get out of the bathroom the motherfuckers have already gone into this room and helped themselves.
Weskie did make up for it though by leaving the stadium at halftime of the Ole miss game, going to the car, refilling the seat cushion with bourbon, and coming back in before second half kickoff.  I don't remember much after that.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

djsimp

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #75 on: June 04, 2011, 09:14:53 AM »
I will testify to this, cause they cut me out.  We were in the new student union and due to amount of imbibed alcohol the previous evening and that very morning, I had to get to the facilities for I had to pee outta my butt.  When I finally get out of the bathroom the motherfuckers have already gone into this room and helped themselves.
Weskie did make up for it though by leaving the stadium at halftime of the Ole miss game, going to the car, refilling the seat cushion with bourbon, and coming back in before second half kickoff.  I don't remember much after that.

Peeing out of the butt is never fun but it is a sign that the previous nights drinking goals were met. I am curious as to what TV crew it was because if it was the one old Verne Lundquist is a part then GF and Wes were putting themsleves in danger.
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Saniflush

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #76 on: June 04, 2011, 09:27:11 AM »
Peeing out of the butt is never fun but it is a sign that the previous nights drinking goals were met. I am curious as to what TV crew it was because if it was the one old Verne Lundquist is a part then GF and Wes were putting themsleves in danger.

I can't remember.  Not even sure it was on TV.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Tiger Wench

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #77 on: June 04, 2011, 11:20:56 AM »
i lived there from fall of '92 - spring '93.   can't say how many knocks on the door... axing for donations.  they promised it was going towards food for the family.  the ice cream truck...well let's just say they served more than 31 flavors.

I lived there from fall 1990 until June 1992.  But I never had that experience - of course, I was in grad school and had a lot of night and weekend classes, so I was never home.  Also, my two best friends (guys) were always with me when I was around - one was Special Forces Reserves and the other was a very large Criminal Justice major with a DO NOT FUCK WITH ME attitude - I have never been safer.
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wesfau2

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Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #78 on: June 05, 2011, 11:46:25 AM »
I can't remember.  Not even sure it was on TV.

I think it was LF.  Otherwise I don't know if we'd have been there for breakfast.

That said, the halftime run to the tailgate feels like it occurred in the late afternoon, which would make it the CBS game.  My recollection of the day took a huge hit in the 2nd half.
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

djsimp

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  • Why don't you blow me ump!
Re: Alabama Destinations
« Reply #79 on: June 05, 2011, 03:10:50 PM »
I think it was LF.  Otherwise I don't know if we'd have been there for breakfast.

That said, the halftime run to the tailgate feels like it occurred in the late afternoon, which would make it the CBS game.  My recollection of the day took a huge hit in the 2nd half.

Sounds like a good day.
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