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Flora-Bama

Flora-Bama
« on: June 01, 2011, 09:50:46 AM »
Headed to Orange Beach next week with the wife and friends, and the friends are dying to go to Flora-Bama.

What can I expect from this place?  I've heard it's the Mecca of rednecks, cougars, and debauchery, but I'm going with my wife.  So, um, cougars and debauchery are probably off the list of things to do. 
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wesfau2

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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #1 on: June 01, 2011, 10:07:37 AM »
Headed to Orange Beach next week with the wife and friends, and the friends are dying to go to Flora-Bama.

What can I expect from this place?  I've heard it's the Mecca of rednecks, cougars, and debauchery, but I'm going with my wife.  So, um, cougars and debauchery are probably off the list of things to do.

Overrated in my opinion.  Especially after the storm destroyed it.  Rednecks are guaranteed, though, but that goes without saying in GS/OB.
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #2 on: June 01, 2011, 10:21:47 AM »
Headed to Orange Beach next week with the wife and friends, and the friends are dying to go to Flora-Bama.

What can I expect from this place?  I've heard it's the Mecca of rednecks, cougars, and debauchery, but I'm going with my wife.  So, um, cougars and debauchery are probably off the list of things to do.
We stay within a mile of it every year in OB, and I have never made it inside.  I can tell you to expect many leather-clad bikers, based on the contents of their parking lot every time we drive by though.
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #3 on: June 01, 2011, 10:35:56 AM »
It's a walled in spot on the beach that sells alcohol located on the Florida Alabama line.  What do you expect it to be like?  Wear galoshes.
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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #4 on: June 01, 2011, 10:43:18 AM »
So far, I'm not liking the sound of this place.

I guess I can fake sick, and then command the wife to take care of me.  Then have the condo to ourselves while the friends go get drunk.   :pb:
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Jumbo

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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #5 on: June 01, 2011, 10:44:27 AM »
The only bar I've ever been kicked out of.
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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #6 on: June 01, 2011, 11:35:20 AM »
So far, I'm not liking the sound of this place.

I guess I can fake sick, and then command the wife to take care of me.  Then have the condo to ourselves while the friends go get drunk.   :pb:
Just make sure you chain the door.
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

AWK

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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #7 on: June 01, 2011, 11:47:19 AM »
The only bar I've ever been kicked out of.
I have also been kicked out.  It's nothing spectacular...rednecks and old whures.
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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #8 on: June 01, 2011, 12:05:22 PM »
The Place is a shit hole, With a ton of security.
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Godfather

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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #9 on: June 01, 2011, 02:15:14 PM »
The only bar I've ever been kicked out of.

Not an easy challenge I would imagine.
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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #10 on: June 01, 2011, 02:30:13 PM »
The only bar I've ever been kicked out of.

Jimmy Buffett threw me out. 
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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #11 on: June 01, 2011, 02:37:48 PM »
Jimmy Buffett threw me out.

I think I remember that story. 
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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #12 on: June 01, 2011, 05:30:23 PM »
The Place is a shit hole, With a ton of security.

Being the "landmark" that it is, the clientele is quite diverse.  Bikers, skanks, college chics, cougars, Frat boys, construction workers, tourists of all stripes.  It's "convention time" down there too, so could be anybody there.  The District Attorneys Assoc. has our conference at the Perdido Resort around the 4th of July every year.  I usually go there one night with a group.  Bottom line is it looks like a refuge camp where you can get beer, and at night it's crawling with cops.   
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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #13 on: June 01, 2011, 05:43:25 PM »
I'm going to be down in Gulf Shores for a week starting on June 18th.  Hint Snaggle and Wes.
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Redskins cornerback DeAngelo Hall said, "Guys don't mind hitting Michael Vick in the open field, but when you see Cam, you have to think about how you're going to tackle him. He's like a big tight end coming at you."

Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #14 on: June 01, 2011, 06:11:54 PM »
Being the "landmark" that it is, the clientele is quite diverse.  Bikers, skanks, college chics, cougars, Frat boys, construction workers, tourists of all stripes.  It's "convention time" down there too, so could be anybody there.  The District Attorneys Assoc. has our conference at the Perdido Resort around the 4th of July every year.  I usually go there one night with a group.  Bottom line is it looks like a refuge camp where you can get beer, and at night it's crawling with cops.   

Cops scare me. 

I had a problem at Innisfree one night with a drunk guy who thought it was funny to grab my wife's friend's ass.  I told him to stop and he threw a beer bottle at me.  When we were leaving, he run up behind me and grabbed me and tried to start a fight.  I stumbled into the road and two cops grabbed us. 

If the bouncer at the door hadn't come out to plead my case, I think I would have gone to jail that night.  I have no desire to experience that again. 
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wesfau2

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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #15 on: June 01, 2011, 09:45:09 PM »
I'm going to be down in Gulf Shores for a week starting on June 18th.  Hint Snaggle and Wes.

Hint nothing, motherfucker.  You're hell and gone from the promised land.  Have fun at bammerbeach.
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Snaggletiger

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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #16 on: June 02, 2011, 09:15:24 AM »
GS is the same drive as B'ham for me.  Go east young man.
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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #17 on: June 02, 2011, 12:15:05 PM »
/Sad Face
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Redskins cornerback DeAngelo Hall said, "Guys don't mind hitting Michael Vick in the open field, but when you see Cam, you have to think about how you're going to tackle him. He's like a big tight end coming at you."

Tiger Six

Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #18 on: June 02, 2011, 12:21:11 PM »
Jimmy Buffett threw me out.
I heard that...

Jimmy got caught smoking a joint out behind the bar, sitting in his car and they took him to jail.

The tip jar paid his bail.
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Re: Flora-Bama
« Reply #19 on: June 03, 2011, 06:31:14 AM »
I heard that...

Jimmy got caught smoking a joint out behind the bar, sitting in his car and they took him to jail.

The tip jar paid his bail.

I think Mick Jagger wrote his name on a woman's bathroom stall.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."