Beat the rush, bang the maudlin drum...

[Kaos]

 

http://www.al.com/sports/index.ssf/2011/05/alabama_football_season_will_b.html

But there will be a feeling that surrounds the stadium, the campus, the city and the area that has not been felt before.
   
There will be a different atmosphere, a different approach, a different understanding that goes along with the cheers and tradition.
   
Simply put, no season before will be like the one just ahead.

[Townhallsavoy]

Imagine how shitty they'll look when the team losing a game incites fury and pandemonium. 

[JR4AU]

Any team that beats them in Tuscaloser will probably be vilified by the press for being cold and heartless.

[Kaos]

Any team that beats them in Tuscaloser will probably be vilified by the press for being cold and heartless.

LSU's baseball coach apologized for winning there last week. 
 

[AU_Tiger_2000]

Any team that beats them in Tuscaloser will probably be vilified by the press for being cold and heartless.

Brad Nessler: "There's another run by Knile Davis!  I tell you he is just tearing up the Tide D tonight!"

Todd Blackledge: "He is just running like he has a huge tailwind behind him!  Look at the pat of destruction he is leaving behind him!"

Nessler: 

Blackledge: "Let me tell you about where I ate last night."

[Kaos]

Brad Nessler: "There's another run by Knile Davis!  I tell you he is just tearing up the Tide D tonight!"

Todd Blackledge: "He is just running like he has a huge tailwind behind him!  Look at the pat of destruction he is leaving behind him!"

Nessler: 

Blackledge: "Let me tell you about where I ate last night."

Nice.   Can I do Ace and Gary? 


Fat Vern:  Gaaahhh Baaahhh Bleeehhh TUSCALOOSA, ALABAMA, where Gene Stallings and the Crimson Tord take on the OLE MISS REBELS!

Gary:  I think they're calling them Black Bears now.  And Nick Saban. 

Fat Vern:  ghahh, braahreg.  Now Gary, Bear wasn't black, but he did integrate the entire state of Alabama in 1970 when he took down the schoolhouse door, allowing Martin Luther the King to enroll in a drama class at Forrester Auditerriam.  King went on to set several rushing records and was the inspiration for the beloved movie Bubba Gump.

Gary:  Thanks Verne.  We've got to talk about this.  The Cam Newton story was the biggest of the century.  Meteorologists have determined that the magnetism of his personality was largely to blame for the unstable atmospheric conditions that led to the tornadoes that have saddened this community.  Newton's father was aware that his son's star shined that bright, but Cam was kept in the dark. 

Fat Vern:  There's no excuse for that in football.  Yes.  Double mayo and extra salami. 

Gary: CBS Sports has learned that the NCAA will not review the Newton tornado case, but they are leaving the investigation open pending hurricanes or earthquakes. 

Fat Vern:  They're playing some rap music over the PA!  I'm gonna dance. 

Gary:  Mark Ingram's father was in prison.  He made my license plate.

Fat Vern:  Look at that Johnny Musso fella go.  He's bowling through the Blue Bears like a tornado through Alberta City.  Nothing but destruction there.  Ha HAAAAA! 

Gary: Over to Tim Brando in the CBS Studio. 

[JR4AU]

Nice.   Can I do Ace and Gary? 


Fat Vern:  Gaaahhh Baaahhh Bleeehhh TUSCALOOSA, ALABAMA, where Gene Stallings and the Crimson Tord take on the OLE MISS REBELS!

Gary:  I think they're calling them Black Bears now.  And Nick Saban. 

Fat Vern:  ghahh, braahreg.  Now Gary, Bear wasn't black, but he did integrate the entire state of Alabama in 1970 when he took down the schoolhouse door, allowing Martin Luther the King to enroll in a drama class at Forrester Auditerriam.  King went on to set several rushing records and was the inspiration for the beloved movie Bubba Gump.

Gary:  Thanks Verne.  We've got to talk about this.  The Cam Newton story was the biggest of the century.  Meteorologists have determined that the magnetism of his personality was largely to blame for the unstable atmospheric conditions that led to the tornadoes that have saddened this community.  Newton's father was aware that his son's star shined that bright, but Cam was kept in the dark. 

Fat Vern:  There's no excuse for that in football.  Yes.  Double mayo and extra salami. 

Gary: CBS Sports has learned that the NCAA will not review the Newton tornado case, but they are leaving the investigation open pending hurricanes or earthquakes. 

Fat Vern:  They're playing some rap music over the PA!  I'm gonna dance. 

Gary:  Mark Ingram's father was in prison.  He made my license plate.

Fat Vern:  Look at that Johnny Musso fella go.  He's bowling through the Blue Bears like a tornado through Alberta City.  Nothing but destruction there.  Ha HAAAAA! 

Gary: Over to Tim Brando in the CBS Studio.

You got a lot in in a short read.  Good work.

[Snaggletiger]

Nice.   Can I do Ace and Gary? 


Fat Vern:  Gaaahhh Baaahhh Bleeehhh TUSCALOOSA, ALABAMA, where Gene Stallings and the Crimson Tord take on the OLE MISS REBELS!

Gary:  I think they're calling them Black Bears now.  And Nick Saban. 

Fat Vern:  ghahh, braahreg.  Now Gary, Bear wasn't black, but he did integrate the entire state of Alabama in 1970 when he took down the schoolhouse door, allowing Martin Luther the King to enroll in a drama class at Forrester Auditerriam.  King went on to set several rushing records and was the inspiration for the beloved movie Bubba Gump.

Gary:  Thanks Verne.  We've got to talk about this.  The Cam Newton story was the biggest of the century.  Meteorologists have determined that the magnetism of his personality was largely to blame for the unstable atmospheric conditions that led to the tornadoes that have saddened this community.  Newton's father was aware that his son's star shined that bright, but Cam was kept in the dark. 

Fat Vern:  There's no excuse for that in football.  Yes.  Double mayo and extra salami. 

Gary: CBS Sports has learned that the NCAA will not review the Newton tornado case, but they are leaving the investigation open pending hurricanes or earthquakes. 

Fat Vern:  They're playing some rap music over the PA!  I'm gonna dance. 

Gary:  Mark Ingram's father was in prison.  He made my license plate.

Fat Vern:  Look at that Johnny Musso fella go.  He's bowling through the Blue Bears like a tornado through Alberta City.  Nothing but destruction there.  Ha HAAAAA! 

Gary: Over to Tim Brando in the CBS Studio.

My secretary just came back to find out what I was laughing at.

[AUTiger1]

Nice.   Can I do Ace and Gary? 


Fat Vern:  Gaaahhh Baaahhh Bleeehhh TUSCALOOSA, ALABAMA, where Gene Stallings and the Crimson Tord take on the OLE MISS REBELS!

Gary:  I think they're calling them Black Bears now.  And Nick Saban. 

Fat Vern:  ghahh, braahreg.  Now Gary, Bear wasn't black, but he did integrate the entire state of Alabama in 1970 when he took down the schoolhouse door, allowing Martin Luther the King to enroll in a drama class at Forrester Auditerriam.  King went on to set several rushing records and was the inspiration for the beloved movie Bubba Gump.

Gary:  Thanks Verne.  We've got to talk about this.  The Cam Newton story was the biggest of the century.  Meteorologists have determined that the magnetism of his personality was largely to blame for the unstable atmospheric conditions that led to the tornadoes that have saddened this community.  Newton's father was aware that his son's star shined that bright, but Cam was kept in the dark. 

Fat Vern:  There's no excuse for that in football.  Yes.  Double mayo and extra salami. 

Gary: CBS Sports has learned that the NCAA will not review the Newton tornado case, but they are leaving the investigation open pending hurricanes or earthquakes. 

Fat Vern:  They're playing some rap music over the PA!  I'm gonna dance. 

Gary:  Mark Ingram's father was in prison.  He made my license plate.

Fat Vern:  Look at that Johnny Musso fella go.  He's bowling through the Blue Bears like a tornado through Alberta City.  Nothing but destruction there.  Ha HAAAAA! 

Gary: Over to Tim Brando in the CBS Studio.

OUTSTANDING!!  I literally spit coffee all over my desk.  Thanks.

[Saniflush]

F-U-C-K-I-N-G    C-R-Y-I-N-G!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Snaggletiger]

ghaahh braahreg

Bear wasn't black?