Eating an lime sorbet at a cafe with outdoor seating. Love eating outdoors. Minding my own business.
Bama Bubba strolls by.
"Ya'll having ya'lls sprang game today?" Mr 13 asks.
"No. Next week." Return to the sorbet, which is delicious.
"Hmmm. Reckon why ya'll have it on the same day we do? Seems like ya'll would wanna move it so's you might get some better attendance. Hell, our game's gonna be on ESPN and everahthang. Jest don't seem like a good idear to try to go up head to head on the Tide like that.
"What kinda game ya'll gonna do anyways? Seems like I heard ya'll only had 30-something kids out there. Can't hardly even split into squads like that. I seen where Bama had somethin' like 35 five star kids and gonna bring in like a dozen more. Be somethin' else to see nothin' but five stars on both sides of the ball.
"So what ya'll think about this spring? I'd love to go to it, but I reckon I'll be like most folks and either watch Bama's game on ESPN or try to get up there for it. Think ya'll will still have a scrimmage? "
I paused from eating my magnificent lime sorbet, which I was enjoying greatly in the heat, looked Bama Jimmy Joe Jim Bob square in the eye and said:
"I heard we had 27 - 28 players ready to go. That ought to be enough."
He puzzled over that for a minute and toddled off.
Fucking idiots.