One of the most consistent things about me is my hatred of bammer. It is a significant part of me and who I am. It is constant and unwavering in its ferocity and depth. Never - NOT ONE TIME - in my entire forty years on this planet have I EVER wanted bammer to win in anything. Ever. EVER.
But there are certain times in a woman's life where she has to take a stand.
I will state in writing and for the record on the perpetual innerwebs that I hope bammer administers a First Class Ass-raping to Mississippi State this weekend.
I want Mark Ingram to have the best game of his career.
I want Greg McElroy to look like Cam Newton.
I want Marcel Dareus to lay a hit on the QB that makes his hit on Colt McCoy look like a game of tickle tickle slap.
And I want Dan Mullen to have to be carried off the field because the magnitude of the defeat his team suffers will cause him to lose both his ability to speak and all feeling below the waist.
Once that happens, and the game is over, things go back to normal. Fuck bammer. Bring on the turds. Nothing to see here...
But for one small moment, for one small wrinkle in the space-time continuum, I will be pulling for bammer.
God help me.